Wedding Woes

Happy Friday (observed) to many of us!

Today’s goal is to do as many nonsense work tasks as possible since I definitely won’t be focused on complex things. Hope everyone else is having a better than usual Tuesday!
mrsconn23MissKittyDangerMNNEBrideei34levioosa

Re: Happy Friday (observed) to many of us!

  • My boss is already out for the rest of the week and I'm not even sure who on my team is here.  I am just waiting for 4:30.  

    DefConn does have school tomorrow.  I may sneak off to Trader Joe's super early tomorrow. Then DH and I are going to pick out a new floor lamp for our living room and have a lunch date.  

    SSDD.  I could go for a nap.  LOL 
    MissKittyDangerMNNEBrideei34levioosa
  • I've been prepping a serious overhaul of our pantry soon. After xmas I'm going to do a search - likely starting with dollar store - for bins etc. I feel like our pantry needs a serious upheavale and it's just ... idk. Feels like it could be better organized.
    I think step 1 is to get a can sorter. I feel like that would be a great beginning.

    I'm also moving stuff around in our front hall - much to M's dismay.
    I think over Christmas holidays, I'm going to try and get stuff to the garage that can go to trash {or curb for anyone who wants it} because I know there's a trash pick up just before new years.
    Some stuff we could probably try and sell, but other stuff likely not.
    I told M I wanna really declutter.

    Anyways .... we think BK is growing. Yesterday she ate so much at my mum's and actually napped! She rarely naps there lately. Last week she did but we figured just recouping from being sick.


    Side note found a song on tiktok I am LOVING
    "Nothing" by Brian Major
  • Kids are off tomorrow!  

    Our state is currently going through a spike in the positivity rate so my fingers are crossed that we both make it through today with no calls that the kids need to quarantine and all of next week.  Chiquita's party is a week from Saturday and then Monday the kids get their 2nd shots.  They could still be forced to quarantine in that 2 week period but we don't have plans until Christmas and then for Radio City on the 30th.

    Now that Chiquita's camping trip is postponed I'm happy to look into fun activities this weekend.  Our town's holiday stroll is Saturday so I think we may do some outdoor stuff and then will plan to Christmas-up the house. 

    Not sure who saw that the principal emailed yesterday notifying us that Chiquito's teacher resigned for the last day they're in school this year.  I'm hoping it's a blessing in disguise because I didn't love her.  She wasn't bad but I was skeptical of her approach and understanding of what is normal behavior for a 7 year old and she lacked the enthusiasm that you really need when teaching young kids.  Chiquito has yet to have a "normal" school year and some continuity would be helpful. 
    MissKittyDangerSTARMOON44ei34levioosa
  • It's weird being a Canadian working for an American company, because today feels like Friday, but I still have a full work week to go!  At least things will slow down and I can take time to get caught up on stuff.  
    The weekend was lovely for me - I had take-out at my favourite restaurant, then went out to eat with my parents, then also went to a work party.  We went for a walk with the dog to an area that I wanted to go to with hubby (it's apparently a questionable area, but the walking area looks so nice) and it was pouring, but it was still nice.  We saw someone walking with their hawk!  Very cool.

    MissKittyDangerSTARMOON44ei34levioosa
  • Yesterday, I did the whole morning routine, got ready, got the car packed up and then kids. As soon as I buckled my 5-year old she threw up all over. Unpacked everything called Husband, work, school and switched gears to stay at home. I did end up getting another wall of wallpaper down. My 2 year old happily played with play-doh and kept bringing me her creations and 5yo was hunkered down on the couch for the morning. Luckily she now successfully makes it to a bowl and is otherwise pretty low-maintenance while sick.

    I am at work today and tomorrow finishing up my 2-weeks and will start back at the old/new job on Monday. My mom has shingles and we volunteered to host Thanksgiving since my parents usually are the hosts (and my brothers place is tiny) My mom is on the mend and hopeful she will not be contagious (rash healed over) by thanksgiving, but I think it’s best for her to take it easy this year.

    That being said, we have a lot on our plate now. Traditionally my in-laws come over for Brunch and then we would go to the zoo (his family’s 30+ year traditional), well last 2 years and this year the zoo is now closed. We are still having them over and will now take a walk instead. H is in charge of turkey and I will make stuffing, mashed potatoes, green beans, etc.

    I really don’t know how we are going to get everything done but hopefully it will all work out. It would be easier if we could just have everyone for dinner but unfortunately our parents do not get along at all and do not wish to be around each other, sigh.


    MissKittyDangerSTARMOON44mrsconn23levioosa
  • MNNEBrideMNNEBride Midwest member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited November 2021
    Happy Friday to most!  I have to work tomorrow but then off for a 4 day weekend.  I'm headed to the office this afternoon for a few hours so I need to put on dress pants and shoes!  I need to get my ID picture updated and then have an eye exam at another site.  Hoping I can find close parking.

    I'll be joining my Mom & brothers at my cousin's home for Thanksgiving Day.  Friday we'll decorate at home and then join some friends from out of town for pizza.  Saturday I'm making pies (an apple and a pumpkin) for my immediate family Thanksgiving on Sunday.  DH's birthday is Tuesday so we'll celebrate with family on Sunday.  

    It's supposed to be in the upper 40s here today and tomorrow so I need to get a few outdoor Christmas things in the ground before it freezes hard.  

    I feel like I'm behind on gifts - I need to make a list of who we need to shop for this year.  Nephew is now 18.  We've always gotten him gifts so will probably continue this year.  Do any of you have college-age nieces and nephews?  Do you still get them Christmas gifts?  We don't buy for our siblings but have always bought for the "kids".

    image
    STARMOON44MissKittyDanger
  • @MNNEBride as the only grandchild/niece child on one side and oldest by 7yrs on other side, I appreciated more thoughtful gifts as I got older or gift cards for stores I liked.
    I know giftcards are iffy, but I always thought of it as "oh they know I like the store but don't know what I'd want/need"
  • @Jstump2 ugh that's the worst, sorry!  Hope that no one else gets the stomach bug.
    @banana468 agree with it being a blessing in disguise that your son will be getting a new teacher.  I hate complaining about teachers bc I know how hard they(we) work but early childhood is a real niche...one of my kids had a nursery teacher who had been a former middle school teacher.  She was pleasant enough but absolutely didn't "get" 3-year-olds and her expectations were severely off.  I hope that his new teacher is a better fit!
    @MNNEBride all but one of STBXH's nieces and nephews are teens now, the niece is still pretty easy but for the nephews I go with small giftcards to playstation or amazon, they appreciate them.  

    Today is my Thursday I guess, school is in session tomorrow.  The kids don't have religion after school though, so I'm able to dive into my cooking.  Fresh cranberry sauce and the sweet potatoes are happening tonight.  
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Not my Friday! Still have to work the majority of tomorrow.

    I’m not sure what I’m doing with neices and nephews when they turn 18… right now it’s no siblings gifts but I do get for their kids. 

    I’m so tired. I can’t wait to go home to sleep.  Have a great last day of work for anyone who has it!

    MissKittyDanger
  • @ei34 that's how I feel about the teacher.  I don't see her as a bad person and I'd guess that there may be a better fit for her somewhere.  But when you're at the elementary level you have to go into it with an energy level AND an understanding that there's going to be off the wall behavior and curiosity. 

    Our parent-teacher conference seemed to lack a lot of enthusiasm and her email to me a week and a half ago that Chiquito was asking questions like, "What if an intruder had a lock pick" were IMO really normal questions that you need to expect from a 7 yo when presenting them with lockdown scenarios in a classroom.  
    charlotte989875ei34
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    banana468 said:
    @ei34 that's how I feel about the teacher.  I don't see her as a bad person and I'd guess that there may be a better fit for her somewhere.  But when you're at the elementary level you have to go into it with an energy level AND an understanding that there's going to be off the wall behavior and curiosity. 

    Our parent-teacher conference seemed to lack a lot of enthusiasm and her email to me a week and a half ago that Chiquito was asking questions like, "What if an intruder had a lock pick" were IMO really normal questions that you need to expect from a 7 yo when presenting them with lockdown scenarios in a classroom.  
    100%, he’s a thinker - and should be praised for it!

    banana468ei34Casadena
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I am at work but zero percent checked in mentally. Our second favorite stray cat outside is really sick. I think she caught whatever the boy cat had. I’m upset and hope she makes it. She was the previous owner’s cat and they abandoned her when they moved. So ever since we moved in we’ve been providing some food and water for her and she hangs out and talks to us outside and is a general sweetie. But she’s so sick. We caught her and I picked up some antibiotics from the feed store to try as a Hail Mary. I wish I had known about them for the boy cat. They’re definitely not vet prescribed but it’s as much as we can do without spending thousands of dollars for cats that aren’t really ours. So since Saturday twice a day we’ve been giving her meds and trying to get her to eat. I hope she makes it. 

    Yesterday was also a clusterfuck of PMDD anxiety which felt extra justified when something from my past life popped up. I didn’t do anything wrong, and I shouldn’t have any responsibility with any of it but I’m suspicious that people might try to throw me under the bus. Ultimately I’m in the clear for multiple reasons but it’s enough to potentially cause me a lot of heartache in the meantime. I’m still stressing about it hard. This year can fuck right off. 

    Otherwise SSDD. It’s a (questionable) work potluck today. Some of the food is catered, which is what I’ll be grabbing and then heading back to my office to eat. I was able to talk to BFF this morning and catch up a little. I miss her and wish we lived closer. Then it’s just one more day until a four day weekend. Whew. 


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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    It's my Friday and I'm following the nonsense work advice. I've finished my BS annual trainings, decluttered my desk, organized my inbox, and helped a teammate figure out his phone problem. 

    I'm looking forward to the weekend. We're heading out tomorrow morning to go spend the holiday with BIL. Then Friday afternoon we'll hop over to my home town to visit my grandma, since BIL just happens to live less than two hours away. It's going to be a busy one, but I'm looking forward to spending time with both sides of the family. 
    levioosashort+sassy
  • It’s my Friday but I have real actual work to get done. Baby M was awake from 1-4. I’m exhausted. 
  • Still decorating and cleaning to get ready for Thursday. I plan on baking a pumpkin pie and making the cranberry relish tomorrow. DS2 came home last night and is working remotely today and tomorrow. DS1 and DIL  are coming home tomorrow night and leaving Saturday (they don't normally come here at Thanksgiving). I'm a bit salty about that because they were suppose to stay until Sunday. They also were suppose to be here Christmas Day (they alternate between us and her parents) but now aren't coming at all at Christmas because according to DS1 it is too long of a trip for such a short time (he doesn't have vacation this year). Well, now that they are leaving Saturday it is the exact same length of time. I get the not having vacation, but their reason for coming at Thanksgiving was because it would be a longer stay. I'm venting because I need to. I can feel my self hardening toward them because they seem to prioritize seeing her parents over us. Her parents live about an hour from them, and we live closer to 5 hours away. Naturally they see her parents more often than us, but they only come here once a year while we travel to them a couple of times a year. I guess I think that since DH and I traveled to see our parents who were 10 and 12 hours away, I don't get why 5 hours is such a big deal. Ok vent over! 
    mrsconn23
  • flantasticflantastic The Midwest member
    Ninth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Still decorating and cleaning to get ready for Thursday. I plan on baking a pumpkin pie and making the cranberry relish tomorrow. DS2 came home last night and is working remotely today and tomorrow. DS1 and DIL  are coming home tomorrow night and leaving Saturday (they don't normally come here at Thanksgiving). I'm a bit salty about that because they were suppose to stay until Sunday. They also were suppose to be here Christmas Day (they alternate between us and her parents) but now aren't coming at all at Christmas because according to DS1 it is too long of a trip for such a short time (he doesn't have vacation this year). Well, now that they are leaving Saturday it is the exact same length of time. I get the not having vacation, but their reason for coming at Thanksgiving was because it would be a longer stay. I'm venting because I need to. I can feel my self hardening toward them because they seem to prioritize seeing her parents over us. Her parents live about an hour from them, and we live closer to 5 hours away. Naturally they see her parents more often than us, but they only come here once a year while we travel to them a couple of times a year. I guess I think that since DH and I traveled to see our parents who were 10 and 12 hours away, I don't get why 5 hours is such a big deal. Ok vent over! 
    I'm going to text him and tell him you're mad at him (jk I have no idea whether his number is even the same)

    I feel like I do this a little, but as the older sister. One of my brothers is far away, visits little, and stays not long. We try to visit them too, but it's quite the hike with the little guys. I just have to kinda keep telling myself that it's their choice, and the natural consequence of it is that they're probably not going to be as close to us (as a whole family), and especially to my kids, as other people are.
    ILoveBeachMusic
  • Ugh, I'm sorry @ILoveBeachMusic.  How frustrating.   I hope you have a good holiday in spite of being let down by their decision.  

    We get frustrated with BIL/SIL that live just over in Cincy.  They're so reluctant to make plans.  Part of it is they have senior dogs and don't like boarding them and another part was it was more difficult when their kids were younger, but it's hard to feel like you're always reaching out or going to them vs. them reciprocating it.  
    charlotte989875
  • Still decorating and cleaning to get ready for Thursday. I plan on baking a pumpkin pie and making the cranberry relish tomorrow. DS2 came home last night and is working remotely today and tomorrow. DS1 and DIL  are coming home tomorrow night and leaving Saturday (they don't normally come here at Thanksgiving). I'm a bit salty about that because they were suppose to stay until Sunday. They also were suppose to be here Christmas Day (they alternate between us and her parents) but now aren't coming at all at Christmas because according to DS1 it is too long of a trip for such a short time (he doesn't have vacation this year). Well, now that they are leaving Saturday it is the exact same length of time. I get the not having vacation, but their reason for coming at Thanksgiving was because it would be a longer stay. I'm venting because I need to. I can feel my self hardening toward them because they seem to prioritize seeing her parents over us. Her parents live about an hour from them, and we live closer to 5 hours away. Naturally they see her parents more often than us, but they only come here once a year while we travel to them a couple of times a year. I guess I think that since DH and I traveled to see our parents who were 10 and 12 hours away, I don't get why 5 hours is such a big deal. Ok vent over! 

    I say this not directly to you, but also something for you to keep in mind.

    When it comes to holidays, someone will always be upset. It doesn't matter how planned out or if anything changes. Someone will always feel the shaft.
    In our family - my mum feels it from me and SFIL and MIL feel it from BIL. Neither are intentional.
    Thanksgiving my mum and I had an argument about similar situation. I've decided after this year we are just doing snacks through afternoon and people can come over. I'm not doing run around. {we also don't live hours away from family}
    Casadena
  • I am exhausted.  The new software went live yesterday FINALLY.  While I'm glad we're here, the journey forward is still long, just getting everyone trained and adapted.  And some people are just being assholes about it and it's frankly tiresome.  Grow up and be a professional.

    I wanted to take tomorrow off, but that won't be possible with the new software.  Otherwise, Thursday I'm staying home and doing some cleaning.  Friday I'm having a small group of all vaccinated women friends over and we're eating junk food, indulging in some herb, i say wine, but I'm not even really sure anyone will want it, and then watching stupid movies and laughing all day...in our PJs.  Then more days off to relax and hopefully start realigning myself to feeling better professionally.
    charlotte989875ei34
  • Still decorating and cleaning to get ready for Thursday. I plan on baking a pumpkin pie and making the cranberry relish tomorrow. DS2 came home last night and is working remotely today and tomorrow. DS1 and DIL  are coming home tomorrow night and leaving Saturday (they don't normally come here at Thanksgiving). I'm a bit salty about that because they were suppose to stay until Sunday. They also were suppose to be here Christmas Day (they alternate between us and her parents) but now aren't coming at all at Christmas because according to DS1 it is too long of a trip for such a short time (he doesn't have vacation this year). Well, now that they are leaving Saturday it is the exact same length of time. I get the not having vacation, but their reason for coming at Thanksgiving was because it would be a longer stay. I'm venting because I need to. I can feel my self hardening toward them because they seem to prioritize seeing her parents over us. Her parents live about an hour from them, and we live closer to 5 hours away. Naturally they see her parents more often than us, but they only come here once a year while we travel to them a couple of times a year. I guess I think that since DH and I traveled to see our parents who were 10 and 12 hours away, I don't get why 5 hours is such a big deal. Ok vent over! 
    I'm going to text him and tell him you're mad at him (jk I have no idea whether his number is even the same)

    I feel like I do this a little, but as the older sister. One of my brothers is far away, visits little, and stays not long. We try to visit them too, but it's quite the hike with the little guys. I just have to kinda keep telling myself that it's their choice, and the natural consequence of it is that they're probably not going to be as close to us (as a whole family), and especially to my kids, as other people are.
    LOL I thought of you @[email protected] when I was venting. Yes his number is still the same! I know he will have to live with family consequences but it just bums me out. You may remember how nuts I am about the holidays.  @mrsconn23, one would think traveling would be easy for them since they don't have kids or dogs. They do have a cat but can leave her for several days with their automatic water and feeding station. I'll get over it but definitely feel the distance growing between him and the rest of the family.
    charlotte989875
  • That’s so tough @ILoveBeachMusic. Before we moved back to Buffalo we were always the ones traveling and it gets tough but we knew we’d rather be exhausted then miss out on family time. There were definitely holidays we missed (mainly Easter, a few Thanksgivings) when we were in NC and didn’t have a break. Our thing was though if we were making the trip we were going to stay as long as we could to make it worth it. 

    I’m sorry you’re disappointed he isn’t able to stay longer or make the trip at Christmas. You seem to really love holidays with your family! 
  • I'm sorry about that @ILoveBeachMusic.  I'll admit that bc STBXH and his sisters aren't close and don't really see each other, we did end up spending most holidays with my family, and my mother always acknowledged how grateful she felt that she had us for every holiday.  Once married, adult children do usually have to split their time.  However the feeling that it's uneven isn't fair to you, you have every right to feel disappointed.

    @VarunaTT your Friday sounds phenomenal, enjoy!
    charlotte989875
  • Thanks for the support y'all. Yes I know adult children have to split time - H and I alternated holidays with our parents. That is to be expected and the right thing to do. Today is his birthday, so I will get a cake and smile. I won't complain to him because that will do no good and probably cause more issues than it would help.
    MissKittyDangercharlotte989875flantasticei34
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    @ILoveBeachMusic, my parents are dealing with the SAME thing! SIL’s family over ours.  It’s a hot button with them. I feel ya

    ILoveBeachMusic
  • I feel for you @ILoveBeachMusic. 5 hours isn't that long.
    ILoveBeachMusic
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