Classic: Should I edit my parents feed?

mrsconn23

My parents recently got invited to a neighborhood Facebook group that, alongside garage sales, traffics heavily in racist fake news concerning real and imagined crimes by “African youths.” Challenging them on facts doesn’t work. (“Why would someone post it if it wasn’t true?”) Would it be wrong of me to sneakily grab their phone and unfollow the worst offenders? They are pretty hopeless with technology, so they won’t notice, but the world would be a better place if their news feed reverted to baby photos and cat videos.

Casadena

Honestly, I'd do this for sure if you have access to their phones.  I wouldn't feel bad at all.  

levioosa

Casadena said:

Honestly, I'd do this for sure if you have access to their phones.  I wouldn't feel bad at all.  

I’d probably block the group too for good measure so they can’t even find it to rejoin. “What happened to my group?” “I don’t know, sometimes groups get deactivated.” 

charlotte989875

Honestly- yah go right ahead. No shame. 

banana468

This isn't really addressing the issue.  It's doing to parents what parents do to young kids by refusing to let them learn anything controversial.  

Only in this situation, the issue is that the parents are grown adults.    They should be engaging in a dialogue about why the group and their views are dangerous and why they don't support it. 

levioosa

banana468 said:

This isn't really addressing the issue.  It's doing to parents what parents do to young kids by refusing to let them learn anything controversial.  

Only in this situation, the issue is that the parents are grown adults.    They should be engaging in a dialogue about why the group and their views are dangerous and why they don't support it. 

It sounds like LW has done that though. They say they’ve challenged their parents and presented the facts and nothing has changed. 

banana468

levioosa said:

banana468 said:

This isn't really addressing the issue.  It's doing to parents what parents do to young kids by refusing to let them learn anything controversial.  

Only in this situation, the issue is that the parents are grown adults.    They should be engaging in a dialogue about why the group and their views are dangerous and why they don't support it. 

It sounds like LW has done that though. They say they’ve challenged their parents and presented the facts and nothing has changed. 

Then that isn't going to solve the issue of their parents.  Maybe they won't be local racists.  They'll just be FoxNews racists.  And if the parents get out of the house and talk eventually they'll run into local friends who will say, "Did you see the latest about what happened on "Evil Street"? 

levioosa

banana468 said:

levioosa said:

banana468 said:

This isn't really addressing the issue.  It's doing to parents what parents do to young kids by refusing to let them learn anything controversial.  

Only in this situation, the issue is that the parents are grown adults.    They should be engaging in a dialogue about why the group and their views are dangerous and why they don't support it. 

It sounds like LW has done that though. They say they’ve challenged their parents and presented the facts and nothing has changed. 

Then that isn't going to solve the issue of their parents.  Maybe they won't be local racists.  They'll just be FoxNews racists.  And if the parents get out of the house and talk eventually they'll run into local friends who will say, "Did you see the latest about what happened on "Evil Street"? 

Eh. I think of my dad. He doesn’t have cable and so he doesn’t watch the news. He gets all of his “news” from Facebook and that really works him up. He’s easily influenced by the posts and believes them over what I say/different perspectives offered. So you better believe that hiding them from his feed would make him a better person and a happier person too. 

banana468

levioosa said:

banana468 said:

levioosa said:

banana468 said:

This isn't really addressing the issue.  It's doing to parents what parents do to young kids by refusing to let them learn anything controversial.  

Only in this situation, the issue is that the parents are grown adults.    They should be engaging in a dialogue about why the group and their views are dangerous and why they don't support it. 

It sounds like LW has done that though. They say they’ve challenged their parents and presented the facts and nothing has changed. 

Then that isn't going to solve the issue of their parents.  Maybe they won't be local racists.  They'll just be FoxNews racists.  And if the parents get out of the house and talk eventually they'll run into local friends who will say, "Did you see the latest about what happened on "Evil Street"? 

Eh. I think of my dad. He doesn’t have cable and so he doesn’t watch the news. He gets all of his “news” from Facebook and that really works him up. He’s easily influenced by the posts and believes them over what I say/different perspectives offered. So you better believe that hiding them from his feed would make him a better person and a happier person too. 

Ahh  - and I think of my ILs.  They listen to FoxNews and my FIL is also active in town and on social media.  Sometimes he fumbles technology and DH shakes his head but he talks to enough locals that blocking a site is like putting earmuffs on my kids so they don't hear me swear but still let them have unrestricted TV access. 

levioosa

banana468 said:

levioosa said:

banana468 said:

levioosa said:

banana468 said:

This isn't really addressing the issue.  It's doing to parents what parents do to young kids by refusing to let them learn anything controversial.  

Only in this situation, the issue is that the parents are grown adults.    They should be engaging in a dialogue about why the group and their views are dangerous and why they don't support it. 

It sounds like LW has done that though. They say they’ve challenged their parents and presented the facts and nothing has changed. 

Then that isn't going to solve the issue of their parents.  Maybe they won't be local racists.  They'll just be FoxNews racists.  And if the parents get out of the house and talk eventually they'll run into local friends who will say, "Did you see the latest about what happened on "Evil Street"? 

Eh. I think of my dad. He doesn’t have cable and so he doesn’t watch the news. He gets all of his “news” from Facebook and that really works him up. He’s easily influenced by the posts and believes them over what I say/different perspectives offered. So you better believe that hiding them from his feed would make him a better person and a happier person too. 

Ahh  - and I think of my ILs.  They listen to FoxNews and my FIL is also active in town and on social media.  Sometimes he fumbles technology and DH shakes his head but he talks to enough locals that blocking a site is like putting earmuffs on my kids so they don't hear me swear but still let them have unrestricted TV access. 

That’s my in-laws too. Total Fox News enthusiasts and their social circle is the same. I do wish there was a way to block websites from FMIL though. Because even FFIL knows that she has some bat shit crazy views that she finds in rabbit holes online.  But no one can convince her otherwise and it causes significant distress to her (in addition to just being flat out wrong). 

ETA: a lot of the websites she visits are also very predatory. (You need this supplement for your unknown hidden condition you definitely have! Here’s pine needle tea at a 3000% mark up as the antidote to Covid! But also Covid isn’t real and the vaccines and all vaccines are poison!)

ILoveBeachMusic

If the parents are in their right minds, LW shouldn't do that. If I as a parent ever found out my children did something like that to me, I'd be angry. Also a parent should do that to adult children either (minor children, it's fine). LW should just continue having discussions about why this site is inappropriate. If it gets too bad, perhaps LW should limit contact with parents.