Step-Mother-In-Law as Bridesmaid

knottie26d23131a112a1c8

I’m needing advice!  One of the bridesmaids I’d prefer is my step mother in law. She’s a young soul and has been amazing to me and a confidante in so many ways. However, there’s been bad blood between her and FH’s mother. It’s very awkward when they’re at events together and although the Step is very mature, the bio mom can be petty and often gets drunk and will become loose lipped about how much she doesn’t like the step. She’s done it to me before. The bio mom doesn’t know how close I am with the step and I’m afraid of exacerbating the issue by having the step mom in my wedding party. A part of me is like IDAF it’s my day and anyone who wants to start drama can get TF out, and the other part of me doesn’t want to be the source of additional drama. 

Thoughts? I’d love an outside perspective.

Jen4948

I would ask your stepmother-in-law-to-be to be in your wedding party. That's your decision (and I think it's a great one). 

With regard to your mother-in-law-to-be, it sounds like she would cause "drama" no matter what you do, and as your FIL-to-be's wife, your stepmother-in-law-to-be would be at the wedding anyway.  You and your FI are going to have to work out how you will deal with her "drama" after your marriage. But I would exclude considerations of "creating drama" from your decision about attendants. Any "drama" that results from your decision is your MIL-to-be's responsibility, not yours.

But I would have security on hand to escort her away or take whatever other action is necessary should she or any other guest behave inappropriately.  

MesmrEwe

I'd recommend consulting your FI and decide based upon their assessment of the situation as it's not just you when it comes to the drama factor that the FMIL is prone to do (which it sounds like she'll do anyway)...