Wedding Woes

Hold firm on qutting and doing what's best for you.

Dear Prudence,

I have been a busy person in the last couple years. I have been planning to go to grad school in a new field, and while working part time in my old field, I got another part time job in this new field. Great foot in the door, right? Well, now that I am planning to attend school full time in the fall, I want to leave the old part-time job, and I told my boss as much in December, to prepare her for this eventuality. I would rather work just the one part time job, in the field I actually want to be in, rather than essentially full time work plus school.

I recently gave four-weeks notice. My boss started crying. She likes me and we work well together. She said she would not be able to find anyone else because “no one wants to work anymore” (that old chestnut), she thinks my job requires specialized knowledge that someone else would not be able to pick up, she thinks she could not trust a new person since she has a lot of expensive merchandise at the store, and she is afraid of theft. It is a very small, specialized business (think stamp collecting or something similarly niche), so yes, it does require knowing about the product, and would take some time to learn.

Did I mention I have been her only employee through the whole pandemic? And she doesn’t want to hire someone else as she is looking to retire soon and she thinks that’s not fair to the new person. I told her this is what temp agencies are for but she says temps are untrustworthy.

She wants me to stay on until December, and I reluctantly agreed. But I really don’t want to, and I would prefer to leave in August. I can’t continue to BE her whole business, while starting a new career and school. The job classifies me as an independent contractor as well, so I can leave at any time, but I don’t want to burn bridges since I’ve been there for many years (and I do like my boss, in spite of this!). Help?

— I Know I Gotta Go

Re: Hold firm on qutting and doing what's best for you.

  • Omg grow a back bone. Tell her today “actually Sheila I shouldn’t have let you talk me into staying until December. That doesn’t work for me. My last day is august 1.”  Send her an e-mail confirmining that. And then do not show up after august 1. 
    VarunaTTmrsconn23ei34short+sassy
  • Your boss is manipulating you yet when she sells her business what is her plan?  Do not allow your feelings to be manipulated into her business decisions. 
    STARMOON44VarunaTTmrsconn23
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Well this was oddly familiar. LW posted the same question on ask a manager. 

     https://www.askamanager.org/2022/05/my-boss-talked-me-out-of-quitting-addressing-hiring-managers-by-their-first-names-and-more.html

    "No one wants to work anymore" is code for "no one wants to be treated like shit at work anymore." 
    VarunaTTbanana468
  • Leave in august when you want. You have her WAY more notice than is expected or necessary. Do what works best for you. 
    mrsconn23
  • I understand LW wanting to give this person a head's up, but the way advanced notice created this mess.  At this point, if you want to leave in August, leave in August.  

    One thing you could do is post your position, then hire and train your replacement if she'll agree to it.   If she won't, then that's literally her problem. 

    And know that in the future you never want to be someone's one and only employee. 
    banana468downtondivalevioosashort+sassy
  • mrsconn23 said:
    I understand LW wanting to give this person a head's up, but the way advanced notice created this mess.  At this point, if you want to leave in August, leave in August.  

    One thing you could do is post your position, then hire and train your replacement if she'll agree to it.   If she won't, then that's literally her problem. 

    And know that in the future you never want to be someone's one and only employee. 
    Yes to all of this. I think offering to train a replacement is a great idea. If staying until December is not viable for you, LW, then you really should leave sooner. However you may feel about your employer, you need to put your needs first at this point. 

    Generally speaking, an employer is owed a good day's work every day that you are working, and no more than that. Try to remember that in the future.
    image
    mrsconn23ei34
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