My wife and I (both early 40s) have one child and a comfortable lifestyle, but it doesn’t seem like “my” lifestyle. I feel like I went to sleep and woke up in another man’s life. Corporate job, living in the suburbs of a mid-western city. I have never had a strong calling or dream job (I recall when I was about 5 I wanted to be both Jacques Cousteau and a veterinarian, but that didn’t last), so I find it hard to argue against suggestions from my wife. (Moving to the mid-west because of a job offer for her, for example).
My question is, is it fair to argue against something when you don’t have a good alternative? We usually get to the point of my wife saying “well, if you don’t want to do that, what do you want to do?”, to which I have no good answer. She seems content to work corporate jobs and climb the ladder, but I feel like I am dying inside a little bit every day that I spend on 4+ hours on zoom meetings. We used to have vague plans of starting a business and/or moving abroad for a while, but they seem to be easily forgotten when they are just maybe sometime in the future. We have a child coming up to Kindergarten age, so I am not advocating for sub-Saharan Africa or off the beaten path in South America. Any advice for someone who doesn’t know what they want to be when they grow up, but they know this isn’t it?
— Reluctant Suburbanite