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FRIDAY!

mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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in Wedding Woes
DefConn started school yesterday.  (Yes, I know it's early...but we have a balanced calendar with longer breaks during the school year, but it means an 8 week summer break).  He was all nervous and "I don't want to go back to school!" beforehand.  He came home and was super happy/excited about middle school and all it entails.  Let's hope we keep up that enthusiasm. 

I got a super nice message from one of my dad's BFF's whom they stayed with for a night during last week's trip.  He said how much he and his wife enjoyed DefConn and that he's a great kid.  It means so much coming from him because both of my dad's BFF's did not have their own kids and we've been their 'nieces'.  To see them enjoying my kids too is just wonderful. 

And to close out, a funny.  So I found new pantiliners to try.  They're organic cotton and weren't cheap, but what I was using I didn't like and I knew that buying cotton was going to be $$.  I tried one last night and things felt 'cool'.  I was concerned that I was having some sort of reaction.  I went to look at the label and I missed when I bought them that they're infused with essential oils, aloe, lavender, and MINT.   Definitely feeling that last one. 

Anyway, this is a 'catch up' weekend.  We were all OOT last weekend, DH was with the global head of his dept this week, back to school, and so on and so forth...we just haven't had time to do shit around the house and we're both feeling itchy about it.  Also, they have to do some repair work on DefConn's dirt bike.  

Happy Friday! Have a great weekend!
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Re: FRIDAY!

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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    Our showings have still been such a slog (sigh).

    The two women I was kinda excited about who were moving here from OH, didn't finish the application process.  One women sent me hers, but the other one was supposed to have sent it yesterday morning and still hasn't.  I assume they found something else.

    We got three applications in yesterday.  None of them were very good.  Two didn't meet our income requirement and the third ended up having a really squirrely landlord reference check.

    We did end up accepting a deposit this morning from one of the applicants whose income didn't meet our requirements.  That would normally be a rejection but, where she is currently living, she has been paying a much higher rent for over a year.  When I spoke to her landlady, I verified the rent she's been paying.  The landlady also said she'd been a great tenant and always paid her rent on time.  Without my prompting, she also verified the story of why that tenant had to move out (property needed renovations).  So we're taking a chance.

    -------
    If you want a story this morning, this is a summary of the squirrely landlord reference from the other applicant.

    I check property records before I call landlord references.  Because I want to make sure the person I'm talking to actually owns the property and isn't the potential tenants buddy, ie a fake reference.  I've caught people lying about 4x doing this, so it's my "secret" trick.

    If the name I am given doesn't match the property records, I ask about it.  There can be good reasons for it.  In a nutshell, if they can tell me who owns the property, check.  But the liars don't know that answer.

    Here's about how the phone call went:


    Asked my usual, reference check questions.  All of that was fine.  Then (paraphrasing)

    Me:  I noticed there is a different owner in the property records.  Do you manage this property?

    Him:  No, I own it.

    Me:  Oh, okay.  Do you know the name of the other person who would be on the property records?

    Him:  I recently bought the house, so it might be the old owner.

    (NOLA sucks at a lot of things, but the assessor's office is outstanding and updates records quickly.  So I'm already side-eying this answer...but I'm still keeping it friendly)

    Me:  Do you happen to remember the previous owner's name?  (He doesn't) so then I say, "I can totally understand that, instead would mind telling me about when you bought the property?"

    Him:  You know, you called asking me about XYZ.  And I already answered those questions.  But now you're asking a lot more that really aren't your business.

    Me:  I'm sorry about that.  I don't mean any offense to you or XYZ but, when I see a discrepancy on the property records, I just want to make sure I'm speaking to the property owner and not a potential applicant's friend because I have had that happen to me before.

    Him:  I don't have any friends.

    Me:  Thank you so much for your time.  Have a good rest of the day.

    Him (more pleasant now):  You too.  Have a blessed day.


    We even told XYZ about the property record discrepancy and asked if there was a previous landlord we could contact instead.  He didn't provide us with a previous landlord, though didn't say he wouldn't, but told us his landlord is kind of sketchy.  That he thinks there are other family members who own the house also.  But he'd talk to the guy and tell him to cooperate with me.

    I got a phone call back from the same number at 10:30pm last night.  10:30 at night?  Really?  He left a message saying he was sorry our previous phone call had been cut short, but to please give him a call back.

    And the plot thickens even more.  The message was only a couple sentences and it did come from the same phone number I'd previously called, but I would SWEAR it was a totally different voice.
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    MissKittyDangerMissKittyDanger member
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    @mrsconn23 what a great compliment :)
    Also what does the adjusted year look like? BK gets typical about 9 weeks of summer break when in school - end of school is last day of June, and then goes back Tuesday after labor day.

    @CharmedPam hate when you love a person but hate the hours :\ 
    Good luck to her for opening her own business!!


    I'm trying to build myself up for being excited. Next year - next fall specifically - M & I are joining a gym. They have a lot of great amenities and family options, plus a pool.
    One of my bffs A is joining too.
    I've gotta wait because my big loan is paid - which should be spring, and then give myself summer to chill, and save also.
    BK has some summer stuff I gotta pay for, plus it's just nice to chill sometimes. I don't like extra plans during summer when I don't have to.

    ANYWAYS
    I'm doing grocery pick up tonight because tomorrow is fairly busy. And I need to throw laundry in.
    Our realtor use to have little drop in events at her place before the pandemic and obv we haven't been since December 2018 or 2019, so I told M I'd like to stop into her first event since then. Ice cream and popsicles.
    Honestly we love our realtor. I would suggest her to anyone and keep using her lol
    That's at 12

    Then we're dropping BK off at IL's - I think SFIL is gone for most of the day because he's driving BIL & SIL to airport about 4hrs away. MIL is home.
    BK is staying the weekend, because M & my 7yr anniversary is Monday.
    We haven't done anything since getting married really, so we're doing stay-cation at a fancy hotel and fancy dinner on Sunday.
    We can't check in until 3pm so that gives us time.

    Since fancy dinner is Sunday, we're probably doing a light on parliament Saturday night.

    Home Monday.
    I'm trying to see if my mum can stop and feed Penny on Sunday
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    @MissKittyDanger, early congratulations for your anniversary!  Your all's staycation sounds like a fabulous weekend.
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    banana468banana468 member
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    charlotte989875 said:
    Y’all it’s been a tough week; we got some bad news about H’s cousin (I’ll share below with a TW: infertility, pregnancy loss) earlier this week and again today. I’m exhausted and not sleeping. Some of it is still recovering from being sick and a lot of it is work stress. I need time to just relaxing and veg out. But I’m going to Bills training camp with a good friend tomorrow so that should be a ton of fun! 

    TW


    H’s cousin (who we vacation with and saw last weekend at camp) has been trying to get pregnant with her husband for like 4 years now. All the fertility + IVF and just about to move forward on adoption found out she was pregnant the Monday before we all went to camp. Surprise she’s 5 months along! She was so so excited. Then this Monday found out the baby had Trisomy 18 or Edwards syndrome and won’t survive. It’s been an awful week. They’ll deliver him soon so they can meet him but it’s just effing horrendous. I know this happens so much more than I probably know. 


    So many hugs to them.

    I'm not sure if you remember but BIL and SIL went through this with their last two pregnancies.   It's a lot to go through and it sounds like you're trying to be there for her which is exactly what they need because this takes SUCH a huge physical and emotional toll on the best of couples.  
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    CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    Oh hell @charlotte989875 that’s awful news. I feel so bad for them :(
    why does life have to do this to some people? 

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    kerbohlkerbohl member
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    I'm so sorry to hear that, @charlotte989875.  What a roller coaster for them, to finally be pregnant and then to have this happen.  

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    charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    Thanks everyone. It’s so awful. 

    Thanks @banana468 for sharing that, I thought it was similar. 

    It’s hard too because of our small group of cousins/wives there’s been 3 babies in 2 years (baby M included) and it’s already been hard for them but then this. 
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    @charlotte989875, I'm so sorry to hear about what's happened to your cousin.  After every thing they have been through, it's just devastating.  I know things have been rough in your personal life also for the last few weeks.  I hope that gets better for you.

    Have fun tomorrow at the Bills training camp.  Hopefully you can veg out and recharge on Sunday.  I know it's hard to take a vacation day when there is a lot going on at work, but maybe you need to for your own emotional health.  Leave M in daycare and just take a day, totally for yourself.
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    VarunaTTVarunaTT member
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    @CharmedPam I adore getting my lashes lifted/tinted.  It's the ultimate in self care for me and I always feel so amazing when I have it done.

    @charlotte989875 What a horrific tragedy.  I'm so sorry.

    Listen, being an adult is just too effin' hard and I need a damn break.  Between the weekly allergy shots, having to keep track of bills/money, taxes, household chores, all of these other doctors appointments I have, helping my parents...I'm just over it.  

    I went with my parents to my father's cardiology appointment this morning.  Mom asked me to come help.  Dad is just so weak, he can really barely move at all.  He's also terribly balanced.  The cardiologist was...IDK really how to describe it.  He was pretty blunt with us, but he was also fair, compassionate, and a great patient's advocate, which was really comforting, both to me and my mother I think.  IDK how Dad felt about it.  Dad basically has 2 heart issues going on.  The doctor told us we were at a branch with his care.  Dad either needs to get very aggressive with medical care and fighting his issues or he needs to become less aggressive overalla and let things be how they are. But either way, we are now at end of life, and it's time to decide how Dad wants the remaining life to be.  Dad asked me what I thought he should do.  I told Dad I didn't think he should do anything; I don't want to lose him, but I also want his remaining days to be as peaceful and comfortable as possible and not filled with us running him to doctors appointments and making him feel terrible being poked, prodded, pills being poured down his throat, etc.  

    So, it's been kind of a shitty Friday, so I just ordered a buttload of lunch food from one of my favorite restaurants for L and me.  And I'm going to try and see a movie tomorrow and hopefully I won't fall asleep.

    �
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    charlotte989875charlotte989875 member
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    Oh @VarunaTT I’m so sorry. I’m glad the doctor was compassionate but damn that’s still really hard information to receive. I hope you can have a comfort weekend. 
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    short+sassyshort+sassy member
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    @VarunaTT, I'm sorry to hear about what is happening with your dad.  It's up to your dad (of course), but I would feel the same way you do.  If time is short either way, enjoy the time that is left as much as possible, instead of trying to extend it a bit.
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    levioosalevioosa member
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    short+sassy said:
    @VarunaTT, I'm sorry to hear about what is happening with your dad.  It's up to your dad (of course), but I would feel the same way you do.  If time is short either way, enjoy the time that is left as much as possible, instead of trying to extend it a bit.
    Ditto S+S. I told my grandfather that as much as I want him around as long as possible, I also want him to have a good quality of life, and for him to be able to enjoy the time that’s left, whatever that means for him. It sucks when there’s really no cure or even status quo in sight. *hugs*


    image
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    Oh @charlotte989875 and @VarunaTT, I'm so sorry.  I'm glad you both have plans you're looking forward to this weekend.  Take care. 
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    CharmedPamCharmedPam member
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    edited July 2022
    @VarunaTT I don’t know what to say.  News like that would make anyone shakey about adulthood.  He obviously respects your opinon to ask and you told it like it is.  Take tomorrow off for you!

    GL on that departure @levioosa

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    MissKittyDangerMissKittyDanger member
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    @charlotte989875 oh jeez :( that's rough and just a lot.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    edited July 2022
    MissKittyDanger said:
    @mrsconn23 what a great compliment :)
    Also what does the adjusted year look like? BK gets typical about 9 weeks of summer break when in school - end of school is last day of June, and then goes back Tuesday after labor day.

    By state law, 180 days of school are required.  Fall break is something many districts have done for a long time, in which time is taken off after the first 9 weeks of school.  When I was in school, it was a long weekend.  Some schools started doing a week when the kiddo was in school.  And then we had some year-round schools start popping up.  A lot of districts didn't want to go to a full year-round schedule, so they decided instead to expand breaks they already had built into the school year and call it a 'balanced' calendar.  So now we have 2 weeks of time off at fall break and an additional week at spring break, bringing that to a 2 week chunk of time off.  So instead of 10 weeks-ish of summer break, we have three 2 week breaks (including Christmas) and then 8 weeks in the summer.  If we didn't have those additional breaks, we'd start middle of August.  We're almost always out of school the week of Memorial Day.

    I'd be OK starting a week or two later, and then going into June, but not enough to raise it as an issue or whatever.  If they asked parents, I'd suggest it.  But we start so early to line up semesters 1 and 2 at 18 weeks for each and the 9 weeks coinciding with breaks.  
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    MNNEBrideMNNEBride member
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    @VarunaTT and @charlotte989875 - I'm so sorry.  

    image
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    ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
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    @charlotte989875, I'm so sorry! That is just tragic. @VarunaTT, very sorry about your Dad. It is so difficult dealing with that sort of thing.

    Not much here. H and his college room mate were at the track today so friend's wife and I went to lunch at a tea room. It was fun - I love that place. Then last night we all went to a popular steak house (tradition for us). The service was sub par. This place is not a national chain but a local place known for its service and food. I was not happy. No bread was offered (don't need it but still), didn't keep our water filled, got orders mixed up and didn't put enough Woodford Reserve on the dessert. I know FWPs, but when you pay those kind of prices for a meal, you expect service. I suspect they are having the same hiring issues as everyone else because our waiter was very young and not the kind of waiter we usually have there. At least the steak was prepared correctly. I haven't had a steak in forever so it was delicious! Hope all of y'all have a great weekend.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
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    @ILoveBeachMusic, was it Peterson’s or St. Elmo’s? I’m drawing a blank on any other steakhouses that are local to just this area. Either way, disappointing service is always so frustrating. 
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    ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic member
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    mrsconn23 said:
    @ILoveBeachMusic, was it Peterson’s or St. Elmo’s? I’m drawing a blank on any other steakhouses that are local to just this area. Either way, disappointing service is always so frustrating. 
    Harry and Izzy's. We've always had excellent service there but it was disappointing last night.
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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    @charlotte989875 I'm so sorry for your cousin. How heartbreaking. 

    @VarunaTT I'm sure that had to be such a hard conversation to have, both to hear it from the doctor, and give your dad your opinion. I'm praying for you and your family. 
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