Tuesday

ei34

Hi all.  Subbing my last day of the summer program for the year right now.  So far only 1/3 students have shown up, they're all on vacation.  Oh well, I'm getting paid either way    had a long, weird day with stbxh yesterday with two separate visits...he wrote me a long dramatic text about being in Denver (?!?!) and kept the story going for a few days, so kids and I popped by the house which he's been holed up in yesterday...nope, he's there. I wish he'd move to Denver.  Or Denmark would be even better!
Letting that go though.  Tomorrow kids and I leave for our annual summer trip to NH.  It'll be my first time as the only adult, and my first time driving solo.  I hate admitting that I'm a bit nervous about it.  I know people in other parts of the country drive 300 miles like it's nothing, but that's really far for me.  But, looking forward to being there nonetheless, it's truly a happy place.

Hoping everyone has a good day and those who were feeling unwell are on the mend!

MissKittyDanger

Day 1 of our plan - aka positive reinforcement - went well. Her daily reward for yesterday was chips. Which may sound odd, but she asked for it when M took her to the store. She asked for 2 bowls, but really barely ate the 2nd bowl.

She picked 2 stickers for the day - Kristoff and Sven because they "go together" - and we've already decided that we'll accept 3 days, but hoping for 4 days before a big end of the week reward.

Unfortunately it mixes with her covid shot Saturday lol but one of my bff's has a fun-day thing by her place. So if BK is up for it, we'll be going after her shot.
Also depending on stuff, there's another fun-day by my mum's.

CharmedPam

@ei34 I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again - stbx is a real peice of work!  Good luck on the drive! Make it fun and stop off at gas stations.  Kids love gas stations! Lol. So do I actually…. Some have updated state of the art “make your own blizzard” machines.  I think  it’s the Love’s stations but i’ve seen them at Shell too.  Not that I’m advocating to load them up with sugar on a long car ride, but I’m kinda advocating to load them up with sugar on a long car ride….

My weekend was, for the most part, good.  Got to spend time with the nephews. They’re a lot of fun but the three of them cannot play together.  They’re only fun if you separate them. No way can 1 person look after the three. SIL looks to be doing good.  If you saw her, you’d have no idea what she’s going through.  I volunteered next weekend too but there’s so much drama between my parents and brother that part of me wants to stay here and out of it.  But if I don’t make it up this weekend or next, Sept 17th is my next free one. 

My neck hurts like a mofo. I think it was from sleeping on high pillows the last 2 days, then going back to my flat one.  But I do have a facial today, and in the past this esthetician has given me a neck massage with it.  I’m at her own place of practice now, so hopefully that stays the same.

charlotte989875

I get it, I don’t love long highway drives @ei34. The good part is once you get further upstate traffic ia calmer. By driving alone you get to go at your own speed and no one else gets to say anything to you!

Casadena

@ei34 that is so weird - why would lie about something like that?  I hope this is over for you soon. 

G *hopefully* starts his next chemo phase tomorrow so H and I are downtown all day with him at the hospital.  We have to wait for lab results before they start anything so hopefully they are good enough this week!  Otherwise we'll have a long commute just to eat "hospital potatoes" (G LOVES to get breakfast at the cafeteria and really likes the breakfast potatoes, lol).  

My parents are visiting this weekend and i'm so excited to have them.  H and I are both feeling really burned out and overwhelmed and they're always really helpful with kiddos and house stuff.  

My boss is starting interview later this week for my new boss, ugh.  I'm glad he was up front with me about the fact that this job is higher level than they would consider me for, but it still stings.  And I am not excited about working for someone else, especially when they're putting an extra level between me and the executive team so it feels like a demotion even though my title/salary won't change.  I also feel stuck bc H is not working right now and i can't leave the company without really fucking up our health insurance.  

mrsconn23

He's just...ugh... @ei34.  Please update us when you can about next steps and when you can get back to the house.  (I'd love a front row seat to the sheriff tossing his shit out, LOL) Good luck on the drive.  I don't love being on the road alone, but I hope the trip goes well and the drive isn't as nerve-wracking as it feels at the moment.  

It's rainy today, but SSDD otherwise.  DefConn's having some 6th grade/middle school 'growing pains'.  A lot more homework and a lot more self-reliance is stressing him out.  He'll figure it out, plus DH and I are more than happy to sit down with him every night and work through stuff.  

Work is all right.  Calmer this week so far.  Last week was a stressfest. 

charlotte989875

Fingers crossed for G’s labs @casadena. That sucks about the job too. Why are they adding another layer? That’s such a bummer to know you weren’t even considered (even if they were upfront about it). I’m sorry. 

charlotte989875

Things are fine; we’re going to the OBX next week so I’m rushing to finish up things before I’m out. 

M is in his second new room at daycare, and while it’s fine I’m annoyed. They made a big deal about getting him ready & transitioning him to the first room but then they changed it and he’s in a different one. So of course now he’s back to crying, hard, every morning at dropoff. And I don’t like this teacher as much. She’s good, just not as good at updating throughout the day. 

mrsconn23

So jelly of your OBX trip @charlotte989875!  We loved it there.  

Casadena

charlotte989875 said:

Fingers crossed for G’s labs @casadena. That sucks about the job too. Why are they adding another layer? That’s such a bummer to know you weren’t even considered (even if they were upfront about it). I’m sorry. 

My boss is a VP of our small team, but recently took over as VP of another much larger but related finance division as well.  So now he has a combined title/responsibility for what used to be 2 separate VP level jobs reporting to the CFO.  So it makes sense that they're adding another person to the team as he takes on more management of the other division too.  I'm annoyed that i'm not being considered but at the same time am a bit relieved that I dont' have to manage this team with all the personal stuff going on right now.  It's a weird place to be.  

Casadena

@charlotte989875 is this the same daycare you've been going to?  Have you thought more about making a switch?

charlotte989875

Casadena said:

charlotte989875 said:

Fingers crossed for G’s labs @casadena. That sucks about the job too. Why are they adding another layer? That’s such a bummer to know you weren’t even considered (even if they were upfront about it). I’m sorry. 

My boss is a VP of our small team, but recently took over as VP of another much larger but related finance division as well.  So now he has a combined title/responsibility for what used to be 2 separate VP level jobs reporting to the CFO.  So it makes sense that they're adding another person to the team as he takes on more management of the other division too.  I'm annoyed that i'm not being considered but at the same time am a bit relieved that I dont' have to manage this team with all the personal stuff going on right now.  It's a weird place to be.  

I get it. The timing’s bad and taking that on plus ALL THE THINGS you have. But also it sucks not to be considered. 

charlotte989875

It is the same daycare @casadena. We knew about the first change in class and we really liked the new teacher so we passed on making the switch. Then halfway through the first week they told us he needed to move to a different class and while we still like everything overall I would have preferred him to stay in the other one. 

M is a sweet kid, but he’s also had 1:1 attention until the past April so he struggles a bit with new people and he needs a little extra help taking naps there. The new teacher is fine, just a little more IDK cooler? Direct? Than the others. Im sure we’ll all adjust. He had *just* stopped crying at drop off with the new class and now he’s sobbing all over again in the second new class. 

mrsconn23

Daycare woes are hard @charlotte989875.  It's all a phase and will be better soon, but when you're in the thick of it, it can be so draining.  We had DefConn with the same in-home sitter for 3.5 years and she was like 'second' mama to him.  He had all his little friends and we got to know their parents a little bit, plus our next door neighbor's son who was the same age went there too.  When we moved, we put him in a center and almost pulled him out because his first teacher was a bitch that had no business teaching toddlers.  She left after a little bit and he got much better, more loving/caring, teachers. 

But knowing your kid doesn't want to be there (and doesn't understand why he has to be there) and cries when you leave him is absolutely a daily struggle. You just want to scoop them up and take them home.  

VarunaTT

My depression has come roaring in.  I'm not upset with myself and I expected it; it's still kinda funny how you can expect it and still be all, WTF?!?!  I was late to work today because I just couldn't get out of bed.  I made it in by 10, and I'm going to call that a win.  Or at least achieving a goal.  I have a lot of work to do today and I'm struggling with caring at all.

Otherwise, SSDD.  I am setting up a handyman appointment for my mother today, I pick up my sleep study tomorrow and I HAVE to do it the same night, so that was a bit inconvenient to find out.  Hopefully it gets me some answers though.  This not getting enough sleep and good sleep is wearing me out right now and I really need a solution.

Casadena

@charlotte989875 oh man that's so hard.  Have they told you why he needed to switch again? Maybe if you bring it up there is room for him to go back to the room you liked?  It's incredibly hard when they have hard time going *hugs*.

I totally get the 1:1 attention thing too, G was home with us until 14 months and has been home with us again for at least half this year.  He is so much more reserved around new people and much less independent during play than N (who's been at daycare consistently since 12 weeks).  

kerbohl

@VarunaTT I'm sorry to hear you are having a rough day.  Hopefully the sleep study figures things out for you though!  A good night's sleep makes such a big difference.

@ei34 Enjoy the trip!  I'm one of those people that like driving for long distances.  I hate traffic though, so I'm more country highway kind of thing.  When I was a sales rep in Ohio, I absolutely loved driving across the state.  I miss that - it's why I want to do a castle crawl across Ohio.  It isn't because there aren't good castles in other American states, it is also because I have fond memories.  

Work has been killing me lately.  Due to my training class up and quitting, I have to do another one directly after this one.  And they booked it in a way that I think they were trying to get me not to take vacation.  Which ... I booked two months ago off of work, and booked my accommodations already, so too bad, so sad, I'm gone that week.  They keep doing that to me this year, booking me for things that means I can't take time off of work.  

My rabbit is sick again, and twice in one week means a vet appointment.  On the plus side, while trying to book the appointment I found out that there is a vet that handles rabbits much closer to me, so that was wonderful to find out.  Now if I have an emergency it is a 15 minute drive as compared to a 45 minute drive.  

short+sassy

I am incredibly upset and just despondent over insurance woes.

I found out yesterday at 4:10pm that, apparently, my property insurance company for one of my rentals had dropped me as of July 31st.  They sent me ONE e-mail at the end of June.  That's it.  No phone call.  No letter.  And I didn't catch that e-mail until I was specifically looking for it yesterday.

They even CHARGED me for August already.  Supposedly, they will be refunding me.  But not even that was a clue.  Because I was charged the same amount I always am.  It was actually my lender who informed me, because THEY were sent an effing letter.  But not me.

It is sickening to think that I could have been...and still could be...financially ruined if I have the bad luck to have something happen while I've been without insurance for 9 days.

This insurance was directly through the company, not with an agency.

------------------------------------

That's the immediate scary stuff and I'm just hoping and praying I can get a policy put in place today.

But there's more.

Another insurance I had...this one is through an agency...went into receivorship on July 15th.  That basically means the government shut them down.  It temporarily transferred to another insurance company, but will move to Louisiana Citizen's in September.

Louisiana Citizen's is a "last resort" insurance company.  It sucks and is expensive.

I'm also PO'ed at my Homeowner's policy.  They decreased my coverage, while also massively jacking up my rates this year.

So I figured, while I'm shopping the one insurance, I'd shop those other two.

I've talked to two different agencies.  Including the local one I already have a couple other policies with.  Still waiting for a call back from a couple more.  Both of them told me they don't have any insurance companies that cover NOLA anymore.  The only thing they can offer is Citizen's.

I can't even believe it.  Don't get me wrong, it has ALWAYS been crazy expensive to get property insurance here.  And part of that is because few companies offer policies here.  But I've always had choices.  And now I don't.

----------------------------------

I don't have the Citizen's quotes back yet.  But all of this just makes me want to pick up my marbles and go home anywhere else.

At least right now 4 out of my 6 properties are under non-Citizen policies.  Though that includes my personal home, where I'm not happy with the policy.  But how long will that last?  I've already seen in my current crisis that an insurance company can say at any time "screw you, we're cancelling your policy".

I hate my job.  I hate my city.  I just want to sell all my properties and move somewhere else.

I know I keep threatening it, but I'm going to look for a remote job.  At least if I had regular income that didn't tie me to NOLA, it would be a lot easier to leave.

kerbohl

@short+sassy That is really scary to be without insurance!  Why is it so bad there?  We have so many options in Ontario for insurance, I can't imagine not being able to shop around.

MissKittyDanger

kerbohl said:

@short+sassy That is really scary to be without insurance!  Why is it so bad there?  We have so many options in Ontario for insurance, I can't imagine not being able to shop around.

We really do.

short+sassy

kerbohl said:

@short+sassy That is really scary to be without insurance!  Why is it so bad there?  We have so many options in Ontario for insurance, I can't imagine not being able to shop around.

Because it's in "Hurricane Alley".  Florida has similar problems with high property insurance, for the same reasons.

I asked both agents why it has suddenly gotten so much worse.

One of them told me rates have gone up across the country because building supplies and construction costs have gone up so much in the last year or so.  Which makes carriers even more hesitant for "higher risk" areas, like NOLA.

I've been dealing with the other agent, via e-mail.  Here is what she wrote:

We have had majority of the carriers close for new business. and 4 carriers go insolvent in the last 2 months. The rates have skyrocketed and its just been very tough.

The italics are mine.  This is an area that already had limited amounts of insurance carriers here.  Apparently even some of those won't write new policies anymore.  And one of my properties was covered by one of those carriers that went insolvent, aka the recievorship I mentioned.

banana468

Yikes @short+sassy.  I'll have to ask DH to look into ours.  We're not in hurricane zones like you but we were in major shock at the cost to insure our house when we bought 11 years ago which was 5 years after Katrina and since then we were in the path of Irene and Sandy.   

CharmedPam

From what I’ve been told, insurance will go up everywhere.  I bought a house out of a flood zone, but someone at work told me that won’t matter and everyone will be slapped with higher flooding insurance.

So pick your state, and pick your natural disaster.  We all have one!
edit: or maybe we talked about it on the boards? And I turned that into a RL discussion at work? Lol I dunno, i’m losing it.

short+sassy

CharmedPam said:

From what I’ve been told, insurance will go up everywhere.  I bought a house out of a flood zone, but someone at work told me that won’t matter and everyone will be slapped with higher flooding insurance.

So pick your state, and pick your natural disaster.  We all have one!
edit: or maybe we talked about it on the boards? And I turned that into a RL discussion at work? Lol I dunno, i’m losing it.

I'm the one that told you all flood insurance is going up nationwide, lol. 

None of my properties are in a flood zone  Though some of them flooded in Katrina (I didn't own property back then).

For previously existing policies, FEMA can't raise the rate by more than 18%/year.  But 18% is already a lot!  And they will keep raising it by 18% every year, until it reaches what the rate "should" be.

short+sassy

I got my quotes.  It's really ugly, y'all.  About $4100/year, per property.  And that's for only about $200K in coverage, per property.

The one where the company went into receivorship is about double under Citizens.

The one that got cancelled is almost tripled.  I was previously paying about $125/month for insurance and now I will be paying $340/month.

Edited to add:  One agent I spoke to suggested I might be better off getting a commercial insurance line.  I e-mailed him all the info he needed and am ANXIOUSLY waiting to hear back.

banana468

The way I'm understanding some of this is that if you live kind of near water your insurance is going up.  If you're living in a flood area you're buying flood insurance which is a payment plan.

And do not expect a deal.  Bah!