Advices needed on excluding someone from my wedding

knottie8b7fa7d2f560cf43

This dynamic is a bit complicated. My family is friends with another family, The Smiths. The Smiths consist of John and Marsha, their adult son Sam and their adult daughter, Sara. John and Marsha have been friends with my dad since they were all in high school. Their son Sam is much older than me, he is married, and only my parents went to his wedding (I was a kid at the time and they had a childless wedding), and I don’t know him very well. But their daughter Sara and I are about the same age (27). I was at Sara’s wedding along with my parents. During special occasions (holidays and graduations) I often see Sara and her parents but Sam is never around. I hardly see him and don’t know his wife at all. Is it rude to invite John and Marsha and Sara and her husband to my wedding but not Sam and his wife to my wedding? Since we’re all adults with our own households I didn’t think much of it and didn’t even think to invite Sam. My parents are inviting John and Marsha as their friends and I’m inviting Sara and her husband as my friends, but since Sam would be the only member of their family not invited, would that look bad? I’ve just sent out save the dates so I could still send them an invite but my fiancé and I really don’t want to add anyone else to our list. 

*names used in this post are fake

MyNameIsNot

There's no reason to invite Sam. It sounds like you barely even know him. Of course, John and Marsha would get an invitation to their home, while Sara and spouse would get their own invitation. 

banana468

You don't need to invite Sam.   You're all adults now and this isn't like you're excluding just one cousin - it's someone you don't know. 

downtondiva

I think it's fine not to invite Sam. You don't know him like you know the others. 

For what it's worth, I think my husband and I had a similar situation with our wedding, where we only invited one of the adult children of a friend of my in-laws'. It wasn't a problem. 

ei34

It's fine to not invite Sam.  My youngest sister and her H, and my parents, attended a wedding a few months ago for a family friend who was friendly with all of us but closest to my sister (and the parents all got along).  Zero hurt feelings from my other siblings or me.

Jen4948

I think it's fine to exclude Sam. You're not close, and he is an adult and not part of a social unit with his parents or his sister. It shouldn't generate any hurt feelings.