Wedding Woes

Tuesday

SSDD vibes here, hope everyone else is okay!
VarunaTT
«1

Re: Tuesday

  • Mostly SSDD.

    Last night DH took one for the team and attended the local board of education meeting while I hearded cats (prepped dinner, got kids to shower and ready for bed) and he got home as they were in PJs.  Our local school district is faced with a budget deficit and the current proposal on the table is to eliminate 3 elementary school teachers, the tech ed program at the elementary school level and other cuts at the middle and high school levels that I did not get to see because I Zoomed the meeting while getting dinner going.

    The opinion I have and that of many parents of children in district is that these are unacceptable cuts and sadly the money needs to be found somewhere.  No one wants higher taxes however the answer is not to increase class sizes or programs that are going to be detrimental to the kids' education.

    And our town in the area has previously been praised for its good school system.  So my opinion is also that cuts like these are also detrimental to the town because if you make incremental changes to the school system you're ultimately making the town less attractive for home buyers and devaluing your own property.    I'd like to see concessions in places and further review of where there may be an opportunity to borrow and or bargain with other employees if that can be an option.  But many parents are loathe to simply accept that cutting education this way is the solution.


  • I am not a good WFH person, especially when i dont' have a ton to do yet (i'm only on one project, cant move forward without inputs from others at this point). So after i reviewed all my work yesterday i rearranged some furniture and kids stuff and totally cleaned our main floor. It looks awesome and i'm no longer anxious and claustrophobic in our living room. The boys seemed to like it too bc they played with more stuff and more nicely together last night than they literally ever have. Love it. 

    H and I ordered dinner after kids were asleep on Sunday and they accidentally sent us home with our order and someone else's. The other ppl ordered very well so we all shared filet mignon, potatoes, and chicken piccata for dinner last night. 

    My pilates class on Saturday was awesome and then i ran errands child free for a couple hours - i'm so glad we are getting to the point with the kiddos that it's not totally overwhelming to be alone with them for a few hours. we also just never really got practice at that because we were all together all the time during the pandemic.

    I want to sign up for a pilates membership, but when i went to check out classes yesterday - they are booked out solid with a waiting list for like 4 weeks. I can't justify $$ per month to *maybe* get into the few classes that work in my schedule. Decided to sign up for a few individual classes over the next month to see how the waiting list works and if it dies down after January.  

    Having lunch with my 2 fave coworkers today and i'm excited for a vent session.  
    MyNameIsNotshort+sassylevioosaVarunaTT
  • I know it's similar to an old saying, but it's still true.  I wish we lived in a country where schools got the money they needed to properly educate and prepare the next generation.  And the Army had to hold bake sales to buy their next tank.  I realize that is not how government budgets work.  But still, yeah.

    Real estate updates:

    My two closings are both being held up by major construction projects (sigh).  But the projects are both starting this week.  One duplex needs a new roof and that is happening on Thursday.  The actual inspection for that duplex has not been done yet.  The other duplex had a normal and video inspection done and it needs all new piping under the slab.  That work is starting tomorrow.  It will take about 7-10 days, but then it will be another 2 weeks for the city to inspect it.  Really, really unexpected because I also did a video inspection before I bought the property 3.5 years ago and it was fine at that time.

    Not only is it delaying our closing by about a month, but the repair costs $17K.  I was expecting it to be $12K.  Which was bad enough!  But, we got three quotes, and $17K was our favorite company and the lowest.  It was extremely upsetting and I'm still sick about it.  I was expecting the whole inspection to be great and the rest of it was.  But this was in "worst case scenario" territory.  Now I'm worried about the plumbing for the other one.  Please, please do not let it have the same problem after I just had to deal with putting a brand new effing roof on it.

    The third duplex has a showing tomorrow.  The other two had a lot of interest.  They do earn a lot more in rent, per month.  But they are also a bit bigger and had higher list prices to reflect all of that.  This third one has a lower listing price, but there just hasn't been as much interest. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    VarunaTT
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I'm exhausted today. I was off yesterday for my "make up" holiday from last week, so I agreed to go with my sister to this boot camp work out that she'd been wanting to try but was intimidated to go alone. I had no intention of joining, but I really liked it and signed up for a 4 week trial. So I got up extra early and went to a 6:30 class today. Even though I normally walk or run before work, this kicked my ass. I want a nap so bad. 

    Otherwise, SSDD. My book club is doing a "retreat" thing at a cabin this weekend, so working on what I need for that. It's going to be cold!
    Casadena
  • banana468 said:
    Mostly SSDD.

    Last night DH took one for the team and attended the local board of education meeting while I hearded cats (prepped dinner, got kids to shower and ready for bed) and he got home as they were in PJs.  Our local school district is faced with a budget deficit and the current proposal on the table is to eliminate 3 elementary school teachers, the tech ed program at the elementary school level and other cuts at the middle and high school levels that I did not get to see because I Zoomed the meeting while getting dinner going.

    The opinion I have and that of many parents of children in district is that these are unacceptable cuts and sadly the money needs to be found somewhere.  No one wants higher taxes however the answer is not to increase class sizes or programs that are going to be detrimental to the kids' education.

    And our town in the area has previously been praised for its good school system.  So my opinion is also that cuts like these are also detrimental to the town because if you make incremental changes to the school system you're ultimately making the town less attractive for home buyers and devaluing your own property.    I'd like to see concessions in places and further review of where there may be an opportunity to borrow and or bargain with other employees if that can be an option.  But many parents are loathe to simply accept that cutting education this way is the solution.


    Having spent a lot of time working in this field, it’s higher taxes or cutting personnel. Other employees are for sure happy to bargain for raises but that’s not a viable way to cut costs. 
    Casadenacharlotte989875
  • banana468 said:
    Mostly SSDD.

    Last night DH took one for the team and attended the local board of education meeting while I hearded cats (prepped dinner, got kids to shower and ready for bed) and he got home as they were in PJs.  Our local school district is faced with a budget deficit and the current proposal on the table is to eliminate 3 elementary school teachers, the tech ed program at the elementary school level and other cuts at the middle and high school levels that I did not get to see because I Zoomed the meeting while getting dinner going.

    The opinion I have and that of many parents of children in district is that these are unacceptable cuts and sadly the money needs to be found somewhere.  No one wants higher taxes however the answer is not to increase class sizes or programs that are going to be detrimental to the kids' education.

    And our town in the area has previously been praised for its good school system.  So my opinion is also that cuts like these are also detrimental to the town because if you make incremental changes to the school system you're ultimately making the town less attractive for home buyers and devaluing your own property.    I'd like to see concessions in places and further review of where there may be an opportunity to borrow and or bargain with other employees if that can be an option.  But many parents are loathe to simply accept that cutting education this way is the solution.


    Having spent a lot of time working in this field, it’s higher taxes or cutting personnel. Other employees are for sure happy to bargain for raises but that’s not a viable way to cut costs. 
    Stuck in the box - agreed.  Essentially my point is that if there is no other way to get to at least maintain what the schools are offering and there is no "money somewhere" then a tax increase is needed.

    I'm understanding that many people in town have lived there for years but I also cannot support the concept of not raising taxes because the costs to maintain your home (taxes, monthly expenses, capital improvements etc.) so the alternative is that the town should make cuts because you're house poor.  It by no means implies I think the answer is raise taxes all the time on those with a fixed income, but if inflation, rising healthcare costs and additional basic expenses are costing more simply to maintain then there's your answer.

    But it certainly is not to remove the para professionals, cut teachers and tech programs and increase class sizes because the vocal boomer population wants their expenses to stay the same. 
    STARMOON44
  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited January 10
    Casadena said:
    I'm having a really hard time getting over the fact that my former boss pulled a "you don't have enough experience to apply for this promotion" even though i have been doing the majority of that job for literally 5.5 years and then hired a woman (who is great, this isn't a slam on her at all) with less than 2 yrs and very similar but less prior experience than me. Especially because he's always given me great reviews and never had major negatives about my performance or capabilities.

    I know those aren't the only things that matter to getting hired, but damn it's frustrating. I'm even more glad that i moved to another team bc there is very little chance I would have been able to overcome my attitude about it and work with her effectively. It will be hard enough to help train her.  

    I know this happens all the time, and i need to get over it, but i'm very in my feelings about it today. 
    I am resentful every day in my current job over a similar issue.  I ran the entire Procurement department for five years.  But now that they hired THREE additional people, I am kept completely out of the loop on the new things and responsibilities that those people are taking on.

    I still have my same tasks, but it just feels like so much bullshit that I'm not even being cross-trained on the new procedures.  Not to mention, they brought someone else in to spearhead it.

    The other part of what I do is for the steel department.  Which, unfortunately, is slow right now.  I've been told it is going to heat up in March and I sure hope so.  I like the steel work better and I'm more appreciated in that department.  When I'm busier in that department, I don't stew as much.

    That's another reason I'm glad I'm moving.  Whether it's WFH or working for a new company, at least my time is relatively short to have to see it all in front of my face every day.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Casadena
  • I woke up at 5 am and made myself get up.  I puttered around, doing the stuff I usually do in the evening, this morning.  But now I want a nap.  I'm also reading really boring over my head science research, so that's not helping.  

    Mostly SSDD.  I can't think of anything new.  Mostly just existing and trying to get rebalanced after all of the holidays and various shennanigans the last few months.
    levioosa
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    That’s some BS @Casadena, I’d feel those feels too. 
    Unpopular opinion here, that’ll probably cause a lot of debate here, but i’ll say it anyway.  
    How about taking away the dependent tax break parents get, and put that towards the schools before raising the taxes for everyone, even the ones without kids? And I totally get how taxes raise the value of your area because of good schools and yadda yadda yadda, but there’s a reason why some people remain childless. 

    CasadenaMyNameIsNot
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I was trying to compose a similar response @banana468 but you phrased it very well. BTW, I am a late boomer and I understand the need to fund schools even though I no longer have children in the public schools. My friends all feel the same way. Of course, we were the involved parents when our kids were in school. My daughter asked me why I cared so much about the schools (this was after she and her brothers were no longer in school) and I pretty much said what you did.
    banana468charlotte989875ei34STARMOON44
  • Thanks @ILoveBeachMusic.  Believe me I've also seen and don't support tax increases in the name of kids as a blanket rule but the alternative isn't that the kids don't  get a planetarium or a sauna.   The results of these cuts have documented detrimental academic development in kids.   
    charlotte989875ILoveBeachMusicei34STARMOON44
  • 1st quarter is our busy season and I have to get all of my reviews done and submitted this week.  Our volume is super high and my director has her sights on that, so I'm feeling the pressure to try to shift stuff around as much as I am able and also encourage my team to work the offered OT to get us back to our expected turn time.   It does not help that I have 2 people on leave and one more going out at the end of next week.  To say my team is stretched thin is an understatement.  I do have some pinch-hitters we've picked up from another team and I'm hoping there's some stuff I can offload soon, but it's been a week already and it's only Tuesday, right? 

    Other than that, SSDD...I think?  We're so behind on packing for our ski trip this weekend.  I guess we'll be cramming for that tomorrow night and I'll be trying to do shit between reviews on Thursday. I get my first review in my new position. I don't think there will be any surprises, but I'll be interested to see what I should focus on/strive for this year. 
    VarunaTT
  • I'm also a childless by choice and I support education b/c of the same reasons @banana468 stated.  Honestly, most of the time when this happens, I start making noise about how much the administrators make.  While I don't think the admnistrators aren't important, the bureacraucy of education should take the hit before the actual educators, support system for the eductators, and any other direct to the children services should. 

    There was some noise here from people b/c "all the kids are getting IPads/Chromebooks to take home!!"  Yes, they are (they're usually donated).  It's 2020 (at the time), how TF do you think these kids are going to be able to work in the world if they aren't computer literate?  Unfortunately the education system has to be able to  make all the kids equitable and equal, so yeah, they're all getting effin' IPads, shut your face.

    Now we could talk about how I get irked that it feels like our education system is just churning out workers for capitalism instead of thinkers, but that's a whole 'nother bag of worms
    charlotte989875levioosa
  • VarunaTT said:
    I'm also a childless by choice and I support education b/c of the same reasons @banana468 stated.  Honestly, most of the time when this happens, I start making noise about how much the administrators make.  While I don't think the admnistrators aren't important, the bureacraucy of education should take the hit before the actual educators, support system for the eductators, and any other direct to the children services should. 

    There was some noise here from people b/c "all the kids are getting IPads/Chromebooks to take home!!"  Yes, they are (they're usually donated).  It's 2020 (at the time), how TF do you think these kids are going to be able to work in the world if they aren't computer literate?  Unfortunately the education system has to be able to  make all the kids equitable and equal, so yeah, they're all getting effin' IPads, shut your face.

    Now we could talk about how I get irked that it feels like our education system is just churning out workers for capitalism instead of thinkers, but that's a whole 'nother bag of worms
    @VarunaTT I think our town applied for grant money and budgeted for the laptops and tablets.  K-2 have tablets and everyone up has a laptop.  There are also assignments through web-based applications like Google Classroom for upper grades or Seesaw for lower grades that require the gadget access.  

    I do not live in a poor town.  I'm not saying that to throw around affluence but my point is that our town is one where people cite that one of the reasons to move here IS for the schools.  Years ago when a blue pill drug company was going through a hiring surge our town was one of the largest ones experiencing a surge in residents due to its location to the company, property values and excellent school system.  

    We absolutely have a sizable population that needs financial assistance that should not be ignored.   But those needing financial assistance are generally those who aren't homeowners and and are living in various apartments in town.  But please spare me DH's former manager who is both collecting a 401K and Pension (DH knows this because of how their employer structured retirement benefits) has 3 cars and is single and tell me about how you're crying on a fixed income.  Your income is fixed but not low.  We also have a decent amount of homes that are right out of a home magazine worth what I can only dream about.  

    From what I can see, the salaries of the superintendent is large but in line with surrounding towns.  And many of the members of the board of ed do so on a volunteer basis.  The current person in charge is great and I actually have some sympathy for his position.  His kids attend the town schools so he has an active interest in these decisions.  The biggest concern I have is that the board of ed has to pass its budget to the board of finance and the board of finance often forces further cuts. The superintendent knows this.  The rest of the town voters are going to need to implore the board of ed to not propose the cuts and then to the board of finance that these positions must remain. 
    VarunaTTei34
  • That’s some BS @Casadena, I’d feel those feels too. 
    Unpopular opinion here, that’ll probably cause a lot of debate here, but i’ll say it anyway.  
    How about taking away the dependent tax break parents get, and put that towards the schools before raising the taxes for everyone, even the ones without kids? And I totally get how taxes raise the value of your area because of good schools and yadda yadda yadda, but there’s a reason why some people remain childless. 

    So I get where you're coming from but disagree because that tax break doesn't cut it for how expensive raising kid(s) can be especially with inflation.

    Want your kid in activities? That's $300

    Work and no one can watch your kid?
    For us doing 3 weeks of day camps, that's $800

    The dependent break isn't a lot in comparison.
  • Hey, I did say it was an unpopular opinion.  And to be fair, I didn’t say we should STOP paying what we are, but if more is needed, maybe lower the dependent credit given.  Just my opinion, and I’m allowed to have it.  🤷🏻‍♀️ 
    You're allowed to have it and I'm allowed to poke holes in it and tell you why it's short sighted - and likely not financially sound.  


    VarunaTTSTARMOON44
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    banana468 said:
    Hey, I did say it was an unpopular opinion.  And to be fair, I didn’t say we should STOP paying what we are, but if more is needed, maybe lower the dependent credit given.  Just my opinion, and I’m allowed to have it.  🤷🏻‍♀️ 
    You're allowed to have it and I'm allowed to poke holes in it and tell you why it's short sighted - and likely not financially sound.  


    Yup.  And tbh, I see both sides, and I like hearing both sides. 

    banana468VarunaTT
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    That’s some BS @Casadena, I’d feel those feels too. 
    Unpopular opinion here, that’ll probably cause a lot of debate here, but i’ll say it anyway.  
    How about taking away the dependent tax break parents get, and put that towards the schools before raising the taxes for everyone, even the ones without kids? And I totally get how taxes raise the value of your area because of good schools and yadda yadda yadda, but there’s a reason why some people remain childless. 

    So I get where you're coming from but disagree because that tax break doesn't cut it for how expensive raising kid(s) can be especially with inflation.

    Want your kid in activities? That's $300

    Work and no one can watch your kid?
    For us doing 3 weeks of day camps, that's $800

    The dependent break isn't a lot in comparison.
    The point of the tax break is not to fund the cost of raising kids. 

    I'm all for funding education, because I see the value of an educated population for society as a whole, and I'm always on board with leveling the playing field. But I don't think that same logic applies to wanting to put your kid in activities and day camp. 
    VarunaTTCasadenaMobKaz
  • That’s some BS @Casadena, I’d feel those feels too. 
    Unpopular opinion here, that’ll probably cause a lot of debate here, but i’ll say it anyway.  
    How about taking away the dependent tax break parents get, and put that towards the schools before raising the taxes for everyone, even the ones without kids? And I totally get how taxes raise the value of your area because of good schools and yadda yadda yadda, but there’s a reason why some people remain childless. 

    So I get where you're coming from but disagree because that tax break doesn't cut it for how expensive raising kid(s) can be especially with inflation.

    Want your kid in activities? That's $300

    Work and no one can watch your kid?
    For us doing 3 weeks of day camps, that's $800

    The dependent break isn't a lot in comparison.
    The point of the tax break is not to fund the cost of raising kids. 

    I'm all for funding education, because I see the value of an educated population for society as a whole, and I'm always on board with leveling the playing field. But I don't think that same logic applies to wanting to put your kid in activities and day camp. 
    I really go back and forth on this issue.  Part of me is, "hey, you chose to have the kid and yeah, they're expensive."  BUT, and it's a big but, having children should not be a class issue.  I mean, I don't get the drive to have children b/c I simply never had it, but I've watched friends of all genders have ticking biological clocks, and I don't think that money should be the thing that holds back being a parent in a civilized society. 

    Plus, let's be honest, part of what's happening in the employment world right now is b/c Boomers and older generations are retiring/dying and there's simply not enough of us to keep most companies going at the same levels (there's some super interesting economic research being done on this issue).  For countries/societies/companies to run/exist...we need folx.

    Basically, I usually come down on, for the US as it currently exists, there should be a healthy baseline for every child that we support.  Education, child care, health care, etc. and I have a vested interest in helping parents maintain that baseline.  Other things are going to have to come from the parents and until the US pulls it's head out of it's ass about how to run the country for all of us....well yeah, it's expensive and it's going to make things unequal, unfair, and not equitable.  I think there is still a lot of that even in countries with UI and the like.
    Casadenamrsconn23MyNameIsNot
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I do not have kids, most likely will never have kids, and tbh I’m not really a fan of them. (They’re lovely and I’m happy for people who love them, but I’d rather not have them in my space). That being said, I want the best for children. Just because I don’t particularly like them doesn’t mean I don’t want to educate them and give them healthcare and basic needs. I’ve never thought twice about my taxes going to schools because we need an educated population. I have more of an issue with taxes (in general) being mismanaged and the enormous amount in whole that goes to a military which actively fights against education because they want to keep the economic status where it is, but I digress. 


    image
    VarunaTTCharmedPamMyNameIsNot
  • That’s some BS @Casadena, I’d feel those feels too. 
    Unpopular opinion here, that’ll probably cause a lot of debate here, but i’ll say it anyway.  
    How about taking away the dependent tax break parents get, and put that towards the schools before raising the taxes for everyone, even the ones without kids? And I totally get how taxes raise the value of your area because of good schools and yadda yadda yadda, but there’s a reason why some people remain childless. 

    So I get where you're coming from but disagree because that tax break doesn't cut it for how expensive raising kid(s) can be especially with inflation.

    Want your kid in activities? That's $300

    Work and no one can watch your kid?
    For us doing 3 weeks of day camps, that's $800

    The dependent break isn't a lot in comparison.
    The point of the tax break is not to fund the cost of raising kids. 

    I'm all for funding education, because I see the value of an educated population for society as a whole, and I'm always on board with leveling the playing field. But I don't think that same logic applies to wanting to put your kid in activities and day camp. 
    With our breaks, the ideal is the break even.

    The logic should apply to activities and day camps. Otherwise the kid is home solo and unsafe? Also many of them teach kids things and can influence how they are in the coming year.
    I mean if you're opting for day camps when the kid is old enough to be home alone long period of time - then that's different.

    Otherwise the tax breaks would be higher with one parent not working and it supplements the income.
  • Hey, I did say it was an unpopular opinion.  And to be fair, I didn’t say we should STOP paying what we are, but if more is needed, maybe lower the dependent credit given.  Just my opinion, and I’m allowed to have it.  🤷🏻‍♀️ 
    My post was not targeted at you, @CharmedPam.  I totally understood you weren't saying that people who don't have school-aged children should pay nothing.

    Public education is just a hot button topic for me because it feels like the government doesn't take it as seriously as it should and wastes so much of their money on less important stuff.  Like the military, smh.  The military, in general, is important.  But it's not important that we be many magnitudes larger and more powerful than any other country.

    Ah!  Though I think I misunderstood one piece of it.  I initially thought you meant non-parents of school-aged children should pay less property taxes than parents of school-aged children.  But it sounds like you're saying the dependent tax credit given should be less and that extra money "so to speak", should go directly to the nation's school systems.  If it could actually be a way to give more money to the school systems, I could see the argument.

    But I'm also really jaded in how government funds are allocated.  It seems to rarely turn out to be a $X-->$Y solution.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    VarunaTTMissKittyDanger
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Correct @short+sassy, I think you worded it better than I did. 

    short+sassy
  • That tax credit is how DH and I view at as well @ei34.  Previously I had Chiquita in daycare for the early morning drop off because I worked out of the house and needed before and after care. 

    Now that I work in the house I no longer need daycare but I do need coverage in the summer.  Yes I *could* have two kids sitting in the house with nothing to do for the entire summer but that's not good for them OR for me and believe me I did it in 2020 so I can speak from experience.  That doesn't mean that the potential $1500/week overnight GS camp we may send Chiquita to this summer I consider why I have a dependent tax credit but I will consider the town's summer camp and aftercare as part of it because most residents and parents aren't off for the summer months. 



    Thanks for the encouragement too.  We know it's going to be a lot of meetings for the next few months so we're hoping that there will be strength in numbers. 
    ei34
  • @ei34 maybe? Here during march break and summer, they have all day camps at varying places.
    BK is doing day camps at her tumbling place and gymnastics - they do themes so it's not just tumbling and gymnastics all day, they have other stuff happening.

    When I was about 11, the local public school had a drop in day camp for kids who weren't old enough to be home all day but older than some day camps. They had varying stuff and it was pretty fun.
    My bff and I would go daily and play ping pong or make crafts.
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