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We've picked our "non-wedding" date?

knottied0b933f5623c1cf7knottied0b933f5623c1cf7 newb
First Comment
edited January 2023 in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Hello there!
My fiancé and I always knew we would elope; we do not want anything lavish or to make it a big "to-do".  We want the people closest to us to witness our union, but we don't want anyone to feel surprised when the see we've gotten married.  Is there such a thing as a "non-wedding"  save the date type thing?  We've selected a date to marry but have chosen to not have a weddding sorta thing?  IS THIS EVEN A THING?  I'm trying to be sympathetic to family and friends but at the same time, may be over-thinking... I'm good at that! 

Everyone keeps talking about " but you'll have a party after, right?"  I think our family and friends want this more than we do - so if we decide to do this, do we just send invites for that event and call it good?

I need some advice, please.  Thank you, kindly!
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Re: We've picked our "non-wedding" date?

  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    knottied0b933f5623c1cf7 said:
    Hello there!
    My fiancé and I always knew we would elope; we do not want anything lavish or to make it a big "to-do".  We want the people closest to us to witness our union, but we don't want anyone to feel surprised when the see we've gotten married.  Is there such a thing as a "non-wedding"  save the date type thing?  We've selected a date to marry but have chosen to not have a weddding sorta thing?  IS THIS EVEN A THING?  I'm trying to be sympathetic to family and friends but at the same time, may be over-thinking... I'm good at that! 

    Everyone keeps talking about " but you'll have a party after, right?"  I think our family and friends want this more than we do - so if we decide to do this, do we just send invites for that event and call it good?

    I need some advice, please.  Thank you, kindly!
    Are you saying that you've picked a date to have a party honoring that you've tied TK? 


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  • knottied0b933f5623c1cf7knottied0b933f5623c1cf7 newb
    First Comment
    edited January 2023
    We only want our closest, most immediate family will attend this JOP event.  my question:  Is it a thing to send a "we chose the date but aren't having a wedding".  At some point, yes, we will have a gathering to celebrate but overall we don't want people to feel left out of knowing we've chosen the date to wed.  Like i said, I may be over-thinking.  
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    No you wouldn't send anything to people who aren't invited.   What you can do is send announcements that simply say you are married once that's done.  
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  • knottied0b933f5623c1cf7knottied0b933f5623c1cf7 newb
    First Comment
    Thank you! This is what I was looking for.  
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Congratulations on your upcoming marriage.  To clarify, you are not eloping.  You are having a small, intimate wedding.  If you have a party later to celebrate, just be aware it is not a belated wedding reception.  Your wedding reception will be what you do host for the guests that attend your small, intimate wedding.
    Once married, there are lots of templates to use to announce your wedding to family and friends.  It can be casual or formal, but just gives the basic details of the wedding.

    (insert your names) would like to announce
    That we were married
    On month/date/year
    In city/state
    Thank you so much for
    Your love and support
    That brought us to this day!
    Report Reply
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