Therapy and stop putting this on him.

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,

I recently saw a post about how perfect faces and bodies age, but a beautiful soul will remain the same. Well, I’ve been in a relationship with a beautiful soul for six years.

Here’s the issue. He is 28 years my junior; I’m 63, he’s 35. My biggest concern is my more apparent aging as of late. I continue to keep myself in top shape, but I cannot stop the inevitable. I’m seeing big changes in my skin and I’m becoming very self-conscious about it, especially, being with a younger man. My worries are never being able to be comfortable in my own skin, literally, around him. I worry about being in public, as well. I don’t want to live a daily life of being embarrassed of my age because I’m with him. He says none of that matters to him and he loves me and I will always be beautiful.

What if I can’t get over my fear? What if I always feel on guard with my appearance, especially in intimate situations? It scares me and I don’t know what to do.

—Youngish Love

banana468

Not only therapy but be honest with your partner.  His job isn't to boost your own self worth but part of being in a relationship is being vulnerable.  So go to him about your concerns!

charlotte989875

Therapy for you to mange the feelings of aging but also to help you understand why you’re not trusting what your partner is telling you. You’ve been together 6 years and if he’s never given you any reason to doubt his love and commitment to you, it’s unfair to him (and to you) to do that now. 

STARMOON44

Honestly I think you should break up. It’s too big an age gap. 

mrsconn23

STARMOON44 said:

Honestly I think you should break up. It’s too big an age gap. 

I agree.  Even if he's into LW, they clearly can't handle it. 

I try to not be too judgmental of age-gap relationships, even if it's a decision I would not make, but LW's BS is one of the reasons they often don't work. 

VarunaTT

I had some issues with this, with K.  Being mistaken for their mother was not the greatest thing ever.  But that wasn't my or K's problem, that was the person's problem, so I learned to let it go and after awhile, it even would make me laugh.

That's double the age gap K and I had, and I think that would be hella hard.  If LW still wants the relationship, they're going to need therapy to learn how to reframe things and trust in their partner.  That still might not be enough, so it's time to figure out what the path forward looks like.