Dear Prudence,
I’m an autistic woman in her early fifties who can “pass” as non-autistic; I’m fine with people knowing, but don’t otherwise mention it. But I have certain food aversions, and by aversions I don’t mean “just take a bite” things but vomit-if-I-put-it-in-my-mouth things. Unfortunately, they’re common foods, including all fruits, many vegetables, most desserts, and anything flavored with alcohol. Sometimes, a new acquaintance will invite me over for a get-together and have prepared food for us that I can’t eat, or a friend will bring over a dish I can’t eat, or I’ll be at a party, or in a restaurant where something gratis shows up, etc. How do I decline these offerings without insulting the host or hostess (and without getting into a lengthy discussion about autism)?
—No Thank You