I’m somehow 30 but having a problem I haven’t had since 17: having a crush on a straight friend. Last year, a grad school friend “Tara” moved back to my city, and we developed one of those ultra-close, more than slightly homoerotic friendships that I had in high school. I realized pretty quickly that I was becoming romantically attached, but I can’t figure out how to take a step back to kill the crush without killing the friendship. Tara may or may not be actually straight (it’s very hard to tell), but either way she’s publicly interested in men, and this is clearly not going anywhere healthy for me. My teen-self would cling to this until it imploded, but I know I can do better as an adult. How, though?
—Trying to Get Untangled