How do I balance my kid’s negative self-talk about their body with both the messaging that “fat” isn’t bad, but also, there can be connections between what you eat and how your body feels and looks? I have a very sensitive 11-year-old boy who struggles with anxiety and depression, and he has expressed recently that he is unhappy with his body, that his belly is too big, and his arms aren’t strong enough. We’ve talked about all bodies are good bodies; that what you see on TV and online isn’t reality; that the professional athletes he admires focus their entire lives on diets and exercise because that’s what their bodies need to perform; that all of us are bigger or smaller or stronger or not at times, and it’s very normal to sometimes compare ourselves to others and feel sad or worried about it.
And at the same time, this kid inhales candy and sweets like there’s no tomorrow and has to be constantly redirected towards fruits, vegetables, and proteins. I don’t restrict any foods, and don’t make judgments about good or bad. But I’m struggling to hold all of this. I want him to feel good about himself, I don’t want to make things worse, and I would love it if he laid off the candy a bit.
—Fat Isn’t Bad, but Fruit Is Good