Wedding Woes

Tuesday

Good morning to everyone on the rough day, hope it’s smooth for all. 

Re: Tuesday

  • ei34ei34 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    ExH is up to his usual antics but I’m sort of not letting it bother me? Really busy week as far as kid activities after work but I guess it’ll at least go fast? Trying to be positive
  • Happy Tuesday. I'm going to visit my nephew at his school lunch today and am sort of excited about it. That's usually my mom's thing, but she's out of town. So I get to go have lunch with the fourth graders today and the first graders tomorrow. At least today is normal time. My niece's lunch is at 10:30!!
  • Trying to figure out with DH how he wants to handle this looming situation with the infusion that the insurance said they'd cover but the hospital refuses to resubmit to the insurance company without an authorization # and the case worker we have doesn't have the #.  It's been a PITA circle and the insurance is in DH's name but he hates being on the phone. 


  • G's hospital was hit with a major cyber attack in January and i still cannot access med recs or pay bills or check appt schedules. I feel so bad for everyone - they've been on EMR so long that most of the providers haven't even ever worked with paper charts. Everything is slow and they only got email back about a week ago. I feel your pain on the insurance stuff @banana468 and hope you can resolve it soon!

    We are finally accessing some therapy resources for the whole family - H and I had an intake consultation with a peds therapist yesterday and got some good idea for how to talk to him about cancer a little more. The whole facility is geared toward families affected by cancer, H and i have access to individual & couple therapy, and the kiddos can do play groups and therapy dog sessions and all kinds of things. I'm very excited to get more involved and i think we could all really use the extra mental health support. 

    Also, super random, but i've decided I want a tattoo. I don't know what i want and will probably take years to actually go through with it, but it really want to do it. How do you all decide what tattoos to get? 
  • @MyNameIsNot that sounds adorable! And i will never understand kid lunch times being so early. 
  • @Casadena picking my first one was easy, finally.  I had wanted one for years, but couldn't decide.  Then my favorite comic came out and people started getting tattoos based on the stamps that are part of the plot in said favorite comic.  After that one, I just have a list now of what I want.  Some people go for meaningful, some people just go for art that they like.

    My birthday party was a wonderful success.  Everyone had a great time trying all of the different things.  My friend who DJ'd did an amazing job.  Everyone was so complimentary.  I had stepped outside to get a break and to smoke and when I came back, I suddenly thought, Man, 16-22 year old Varuna would be so stoked right now to know I was having a party like this at 47.  Everyone got there around 6 and were gone by 10:30 and I crashed.  Now I have plenty of syrups and things to make my own mocktails at home and that's fun too.

    I did my first round of cluster shots.  That's where they do a bunch of the allergy shots in one day.  So I had 3 shots, waited an hour, then did 3 more.  I did have a reaction, but it was mild...to me anyway.  The doctor wanted to hit me with the epi and send me to the hospital and I said no.  My eyes were a bit swollen and that was really it.  She said my lungs sounded fine, but she was concerned b/c I was coughing.  I convinced them to let me go home and just take a large dose of Benadryl, which knocked me out for the day.

    Back at work.  I'm still not feeling it, but it's another short week for me.
  • @Casadena oh shit, hospitals are bad :\ 

    @VarunaTT Did I miss your bday? Happy belated then! Yay party went well :)

    @banana468 dying lmaoooo!
  • short+sassyshort+sassy member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 27
    @VarunaTT, I'm glad your party was such a success!  I know you were really looking forward to it.  I hope you're feeling better today after all the allergy stuff yesterday.

    I need more medical care, but have been flaking on talking to my medical insurance.  It's a high deductible plan anyway, but I guess I get their discounts so I assume it's worth it to use a provider in their network.  A nutritionist and a therapist, to be specific.

    For the nutritionist, I want to find out if I can eat fewer calories than I am since I'm only 5'0", but while still getting all the nutrients I need and without slowing my metabolism to a crawl.  I have an appointment with my endocrinologist in early April and I am going to ask him those questions first and then see a nutritionist.  I'll ask him for some recommendations also and hopefully one of those people are in my insurance network.

    I have been having weird bouts of depression for the last month.  I've always had trouble with motivation, but it has been so much worse lately.  Which also makes it harder to do even the simplest things sometimes, including eating a balanced diet with lots of water.

    I've had some instances over the last few weeks where it's like a wave of hopelessness with a bit of panic washes over me and I have to force myself to not just burst into tears for no reason in the middle of Costco or my workday.  I've rarely had this happen in the past.

    I took an online depression test and it said I have moderate depression (sigh).  I suspect I've had mild depression at different times in my life, but I've always ignored it.  It's this sudden escalation I find concerning and feel it is finally time to try therapy.

    I feel like online therapy will be more my cup of tea because dragging myself to someone's office feels like too much and is probably too expensive if I end up finding it helpful and want to do it for a longer haul.  Do any of you all have recommendations?  It's okay if they don't take insurance.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • @Casadena - This is going to sound incredibly dorky, but ChatGPT. I got my first one on a whim at 18 and don't really like it, so I spent 20+ years agonizing over what I should get next. Last year, I was playing with chatGPT for tattoo ideas and plugged in some of my interests/loves. It gave me some vague ideas that was at least a starting point. Then I talked to the artist who fleshed it out into a real design.
  • Helloooo.  I had such a shit day yesterday.  I'm so glad today is better. 

    Ugh to your ex, @ei34
    I feel your H and his avoidance of phone calls, but I also know it annoys my partner @banana468...Also, the straw conversation is amazing. 
    Oh no, @Casadena.  That sucks and is frustrating. 
    Take it easy @charlotte989875. I cannot imagine being that sick postpartum with a 2mo old.  The last 2 times I had strep, I could barely be upright for at least 2 days.  

    SSDD otherwise.  Waiting on these storms that are supposed to hit us tonight.  
  • @MyNameIsNot that's actually a great idea.  I'm struggling with loving some of the wonderful uses of AI, but then being so irritated by the "creation" portion of it.

    @short+sassy, that can also be perimenopausal stuffs.  I was so mad, the other day I found out that itchy ears can be a perimenopausal symptom.  LIke, WTF is all of this nonsense even, I'm already tired of it and still averaging a period about every 6 weeks, so assuming menopause is still far away.
  • I found my therapist on Psychology Today @short+sassy . You can search by symptoms, level of degree, other specialties, and contact ones you are interested. Most are/ should be willing to do an introductory call to see if you’re both good fits. Mine doesn’t take my insurance so I pay OOP but I resubmit invoices to have it count against my out of network insurance deductible. You can ask them if they’ll do phone/video sessions, mine does. We started remote in the pandemic but she does now see patients in person again but I’ve opted to remain by phone. 
  • @mrsconn23 I played the video for her and I just couldn't get over how it's just SO MUCH.

    DH did call into the insurance case worker.   I absolutely hate that in the current state not only will Chiquita need to make sure she maintains a job, but she'll also need to be great at record keeping and note taking  with the additional bandwidth for phone calls OH and the long appointments every few weeks!  All while our insurance company posted $55 billion in profits last year.  

    I'm all for making a profit and I'm not in favor of single payer but really wish there was some kind of happy medium with additional regulation so that this wasn't just the expected process. 
  • @VarunaTT, perimenopause!!!  Again possibly causing random issues!  Thanks for the suggestion, though.  It's at least nice to know a potential cause.  Ugh, why must this be a years long process?  Just shut the factory down already, lol.  I've heard menopause initially sucks, but then the body calms down and it's great.

    @charlotte989875, thanks for the recommendation!  I'll check them out.  I've tried reading reviews for different online mental health providers.  But they tend to be very hot and cold, without much in between.  It's been hard to identify a clear winner.

    That's why I asked the group.  I definitely value your all's opinions much more than random online reviews.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • sorry @short+sassy but I’m also voting for perimenopause once you’ve rule out other life stressors and medical (like thyroid) issues. Yay having a uterus. On the upside, if you decide to try medications, some of the SSRIs are also helpful for hot flashes…when those eventually come…because yay, hateful uterus. 


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  • ei34ei34 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Sending the love your way @short+sassy and sorry that you have been feeling so down 

    Happy to hear that your birthday party was a success @VarunaTT
  • banana468 said:
    @mrsconn23 I played the video for her and I just couldn't get over how it's just SO MUCH.

    DH did call into the insurance case worker.   I absolutely hate that in the current state not only will Chiquita need to make sure she maintains a job, but she'll also need to be great at record keeping and note taking  with the additional bandwidth for phone calls OH and the long appointments every few weeks!  All while our insurance company posted $55 billion in profits last year.  

    I'm all for making a profit and I'm not in favor of single payer but really wish there was some kind of happy medium with additional regulation so that this wasn't just the expected process. 
    YUP. 

    (I am for single payer but otherwise completely agree). We just got the bill for J’s second hospital stay that lasted 3 days. Billed our insurance $87,698. Our portion is “only” $5k. At least we hit our deductible in the first month of the year. 
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