fake, fake, fakey, fake

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,

My boyfriend is a filmmaker and an artistic genius! I believe he is a great talent and that someday he’ll be a star Hollywood producer. But his production company has recently fallen on hard times, and he has taken to using my 900-square-foot apartment as a studio. I was excited when he moved in, because I love him like a puppy dog, and he promised that he would film scenes in the apartment only while I was at work. When I came in the other day, he was filming a scene from a script, The Death of Marat, where he gets stabbed in the bathtub. I walked in and thought he was stabbed in a puddle of blood in my bathtub! I just don’t know how to break up with my boyfriend. What happens someday when he gets his lucky break and makes the big time? On the other hand, what if that never happens? I love him, but I can’t have four guys and fake blood in my apartment 20 hours a day! I am sure that kicking him out would mean breaking up permanently. What should I do?

—Marat’s Girlfriend

short+sassy

Assuming this is a real letter, why is the LW constantly zooming from 0 to 100.  They could put more boundaries in place, first.  Because there are only so many scenes that can be filmed in a studio apartment.

Running a failing business is arguably worse than being unemployed and that is what the LW has hitched their star to.  I know they keep talking about love, but there also seems to be a healthy dose of being a future gold digger.  If so, he is not a good "investment".  It's delusional to think that talent alone means someone will make a financially prosperous living in the highly competitive tv/movie industry.

banana468

How great is this guy in the sack that it's worth the financial loss for you?  

CharmedPam

I’m still stuck on the “I love him like a puppy dog” part

mrsconn23

Oh god, 'artistic genius'.  Art is...subjective, LW.  From what you've described, he's some A24 knockoff and won't get a second look from them. 

Anyway, the logistics of this is mind-bottling if it's been longer than a week or so. HOW the hell aren't the neighbors complaining?  I don't imagine this death scene stuff is going quietly.  

Anyway, talk to your BF LW.  Tell him that you didn't realize how much of an undertaking this would be and set a timeline for this to be over or they need find somewhere else to 'genius' all over.  If he can't abide by it or breaks up with you because you asked him something incredibly reasonable, then you have your answer. One day, when if he makes it to the awards show stage, you'll have a story to tell. 

banana468

CharmedPam said:

I’m still stuck on the “I love him like a puppy dog” part

And.....puppies grow up so their owners can be excited that they stopped chewing holes in the carpet.