Dear Prudence,
I’m a 74-year-old gay man. My husband died 11 years ago after a 40-year relationship; it took me two years to restore equilibrium, but it’s nine years later and I’m perfectly happy to be the single man that I am now. My friends know that, but I still belong to some of the gay sites I used to belong to and, on those, men ask me why I’m so reluctant to find someone else to be romantic with. I tell them I grew up as an only child (it’s the truth), and I’m happier like this. What I do need, however, is friends, and it’s beginning to seem to me that the only good friends I have are the folks that staff the restaurants I go to. (I do document my meals out at a website, so it scratches my writer’s itch.) I’m not sure what to do to make new friends, something I was never good at before I met Jim. I’m still working as a college professor, but entirely online due to some health problems I have. How do I make new friends at this advanced age?
—Professor Gourmand