Dear Prudence,
My best friend, “S,” is engaged to another friend, “E.” S and E have been together for about two and a half years, and are planning to get married in October 2025. I am generally friends with both, but was friends with S first, and am much closer to S. Since the beginning of their relationship, S and E have had communication issues and have had really high highs and low lows. They are in couples counseling. I don’t think they should get married. I’ve been against it the whole time they’ve been engaged. They both have disabilities that clash, and often make it difficult to live together (for example, E needs a clean space but S can’t maintain spaces, S is over-stimulated by loud noises and E mostly makes loud noises to show affection), and have very different communication styles. I know I can’t tell them to break up. But being around them, together or separately, recently has been driving me bananas, and I become unpleasant and unkind. How do I separate myself, while also still supporting my best friend? I care about both of them a lot and want them to be happy, but I also want to be happy.
—Friend in the Middle