Wedding Woes
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This is a deal-breaker, IMO.

Dear Prudence,

Packages constantly get stolen in our apartment complex so I usually send packages to the parents of my girlfriend (with their blessing). I ordered several large and expensive Lego sets after finishing a major project as a reward for myself. They got delivered to the house but went missing in the few days it took me to swing by. The delivery driver shot a picture of the packages and my girlfriend’s mom swore she left them in the laundry room for me. What happened was my girlfriend’s stepsister, “Amy,” helped herself to the packages. She claimed she thought they were hers and when she opened them her sons went crazy and wanted to play with them. Amy didn’t see the “harm.” Her sons destroyed over $2,000 in Lego sets and all I got was a tub of mismatched pieces.

I told Amy that if she paid for the replacements we would call it even. Amy claimed she didn’t have the money because she was saving to fix up her car, and a real man shouldn’t be playing with toys. I threatened to take it to small claims court which is when Amy’s father stepped in and paid me back. Now things are very frosty between my girlfriend and her family. Initially, my girlfriend was on my side but now makes comments about how I escalated things and should have let it go. We finally had a fight where I told her it wasn’t my fault that Amy was a damn, dirty thief and that what she did wasn’t any different than taking money out of my wallet. I am now sending packages to my workplace and it is a hassle since I work hybrid. I thought I had a pretty good relationship with my girlfriend and her parents until this. Is this a red flag or not?

—Let Go of My Lego

Re: This is a deal-breaker, IMO.

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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Deal  breaker territory.  The only good person here is the father.


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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    I bet this isn't the first time and it won't be the last that Amy pulls this shit.  And she apparently gets away with it since no one will allow her to suffer actual consequences. 

    If you continue down the path with your GF, this situation isn't going to change and they may not ever warm up to you since you (rightfully) demanded accountability and they are all mad at you for it.  Your GF, instead of standing up for you, who was wronged, is now caving to her family and pressuring you to back down/off.   Is this worth it? 
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    levioosalevioosa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Nope. Sometimes SIL sends packages to our house because they've had theirs stolen before (so have we but apparently they feel out house is more hidden). I would be livid if we had a family member over who decided, "let me just see what this package is," only to return it after significant goading, broken and missing pieces. Nope. You are 35 not 5 and you can read and clearly that package was not for you. I've even accidentally opened up H's package before and I've gone, "oops, sorry I opened this on accident. It's actually yours, my bad." 


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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    mrsconn23 said:
    levioosa said:
    Nope. Sometimes SIL sends packages to our house because they've had theirs stolen before (so have we but apparently they feel out house is more hidden). I would be livid if we had a family member over who decided, "let me just see what this package is," only to return it after significant goading, broken and missing pieces. Nope. You are 35 not 5 and you can read and clearly that package was not for you. I've even accidentally opened up H's package before and I've gone, "oops, sorry I opened this on accident. It's actually yours, my bad." 
    No one ever mistakes $2k worth of Legos as an 'accidental' purchase for them/their kids.  Furthermore, the Legos LW is likely talking about are definitely not meant for kids and the packaging is pretty clear how intricate they are.  Amy is a lying thief and gets cover from her family, including LW's GF.  Leave the lot of them behind, IMO. 
    RIGHT?! 

    Lego assembly kits are pretty well marked, noted with age recommendations and any parent not living under a rock knows that these aren't cheap.   
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    "Real adults don't steal from people.  Especially their sister's boyfriend."
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    levioosalevioosa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    mrsconn23 said:
    levioosa said:
    Nope. Sometimes SIL sends packages to our house because they've had theirs stolen before (so have we but apparently they feel out house is more hidden). I would be livid if we had a family member over who decided, "let me just see what this package is," only to return it after significant goading, broken and missing pieces. Nope. You are 35 not 5 and you can read and clearly that package was not for you. I've even accidentally opened up H's package before and I've gone, "oops, sorry I opened this on accident. It's actually yours, my bad." 
    No one ever mistakes $2k worth of Legos as an 'accidental' purchase for them/their kids.  Furthermore, the Legos LW is likely talking about are definitely not meant for kids and the packaging is pretty clear how intricate they are.  Amy is a lying thief and gets cover from her family, including LW's GF.  Leave the lot of them behind, IMO. 
    Right? In no world would I ever mistake a Lego set for adults for legos meant for 3-10 year olds. I bet if something had happened to the kids (like god forbid choking on a small piece) somehow sister would have blamed LW for that too. 


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    Yah this is over. Maybe look into a post office box in your neighborhood. 
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