Wedding Woes

Ohh I want to swoop this LW up.

Dear Prudence,

I’m a 15-year-old male living with my soon-to-be 17 big brother and my mom and dad. Ever since I turned 13, my father has had a sudden interest in politics and other things like that, but he also has become racist to people of color and is also anti-Semitic. He has never acted out in public, but he has left the impression that those people are bad to my brother and mother. I know that this is wrong but I don’t know what to do about it. He is a good dad but I just want him to be more friendly and caring because I love him.

—Need Some Support

Re: Ohh I want to swoop this LW up.

  • LW know that you can love people who are kind to you and a jerk to others and that means you need to have your guard up and keep your distance. 
  • This sounds so familiar with the political/COVID/societal issues divide that we've seen over the last few years.

    They've always existed (except COVID), but have become exacerbated.  Along with it being "okay" in certain groups to be racist/sexist/anti-Semitic.

    If he's comfortable doing it, the son should speak out in defense at least some of the time when his dad does this.  It probably won't change the dad's mind, but it could open it some.  At the very least, the LW might feel better about himself that the dad isn't reading his silence as agreeing.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Libraries are awesome and it might be time to read about how to address this in your family in a safe place away from them. You can learn tons of ways to bring this up and keep learning more until you feel ready to ask a “why would you say that” or a “what do you mean by that”. 

    I feel for the LW so much to be the youngest in the family and feeling like they’re the only one that sees this is wrong. 
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