Maid of honor not invited to bachelorette party???

knottie66553b59180c0b7c

Scenario: The bride tells the maid of honor "I don't want you coming to the bachelorette party." Does the maid of honor have any responsibilities (planning, financial, whatever) for the bachelorette party?

ILoveBeachMusic

If I were the maid of honor I would rethink this friendship. The MOH is never obligated to plan or provide money for a bachelorette party. 

Jen4948

The maid of honor has no responsibilities beyond showing up to the wedding ceremony and reception on time, in good spirits, wearing the designated outfit, properly grooming herself and with appropriate attention to personal hygiene, and perhaps posing for some photos.

But I'm struggling with the notion of a bride telling her MOH she doesn't want her to attend her bachelorette party (unless there was a fallout between them of some kind). I do think it's wrong for anyone to tell anyone else they don't want them to attend their event: I think the correct approach is to simply not invite them. I just don't get this between a bride and her MOH who are supposedly on good terms.

MyNameIsNot

knottie66553b59180c0b7c said:

Scenario: The bride tells the maid of honor "I don't want you coming to the bachelorette party." Does the maid of honor have any responsibilities (planning, financial, whatever) for the bachelorette party?

The MOH wouldn't be responsible anyway. The bach party is optional by anyone who chooses to offer to throw it. Typically the MOH is the bride's BFF, so that's often who wants to throw a bachelorette. 

In this case, the MOH is probably rethinking having anything to do with the bride at all. That's not how friends behave. 

MesmrEwe

The only scenario I can think of this as okay is if the MOH is new to sobriety or of a particular religion that frowns upon anything to do with a strip club and bride wants to go on an all night C&B Thunder down under bender for the Bach party. If I was the MOH and none of the above applies, I'd be questioning the friendship and involvement in the wedding at all other than maybe a guest...

If the MOH isn't the one hosting the event they are under ZERO obligation to provide anything for the event whatever event that may be.  As Jen mentioned.."The maid of honor has no responsibilities beyond showing up to the wedding ceremony and reception on time, in good spirits, wearing the designated outfit, properly grooming herself and with appropriate attention to personal hygiene, and perhaps posing for some photos." 

MobKaz

knottie66553b59180c0b7c said:

Scenario: The bride tells the maid of honor "I don't want you coming to the bachelorette party." Does the maid of honor have any responsibilities (planning, financial, whatever) for the bachelorette party?

The bride should have little say in the planning of a bachelorette party.  Obviously, the person planning the event does need to know who can be invited, since you can only include people invited to the wedding.  For that list the bride would have to be involved.

Are YOU the MOH?  If you are and have been "disinvited" to this party, I would disinvite myself right out of the wedding as well.  Were you told/pressured into hosting this event?  It sounds as if you (rightly so) declined or questioned that expense and burden.  If the response of this bride was to prevent you from attending because you did not kowtow to her, I would get out of Dodge and never look back.

levioosa

I don't need more information. But I want more information. At any rate, the MOH (or Bridal Party/Groomsmen in general) are not required to plan, pay, or host any events. If they offer, it's a nice extra. But there is not a world where I can imagine telling my bff, my MOH that she doesn't get to attend a pre-wedding party if she wants to go.