Oh hell no.

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,

Our place is usually where our family hangs out together since we have a pool in the back and a nice shady area where we cook out and eat on the side of our property. My nieces and nephews are roughly split between the teen and toddler age groups. The house next to ours is a rental and a new family moved in. We hadn’t even been introduced when our neighbor started sending her four roughly elementary-age kids over to beg for food or to play in the pool. I send the kids right back home every time explaining that these are private family events. And every time they show up at our next gathering.

I can’t get their mother to come to the door and she has ignored the notes that I have left. It is moving from an annoyance to a headache. Last time, I caught one of the boys stealing an entire dozen cupcakes while my back was turned. He dropped them after I yelled at him and ran back to his house. The cupcakes were completely smashed. We stopped cooking at our place and instead have been going to the park. It’s ridiculous that my family can’t relax and enjoy themselves on my own property because of these people. What can I do?

—Nasty Neighbors

MyNameIsNot

I would seriously think about calling CPS. These are young children without adult supervision repeatedly trespassing on neighbors' property. 

But also, put up a fence. You need one with a pool anyway. 

VarunaTT

You need a fence.  I'd be worried about those kids coming over totally unsupervised and someone getting hurt or drowning,

mrsconn23

LW definitely needs a fence.  Also, I'd call the landlord on her.  Can you file a complaint against the landlord if their tenant is a nuisance to the neighbors? 

But I'd also not be above calling authorities on the kids because you're worried about their safety.  I am not typically a fan of calling the cops, especially on kids, but they are endangered by being outside and trespassing into neighbor's yards with a pool, and that they are asking for food.  I mean, I'd look long and hard at the kids to see if they look under nourished. 

You've tried to figure it out with their parent and she's clearly uninterested (which side note, fucking insane bullshit entitled behavior on her part. I mean, I feel for the plight of single parents and all that, but this is beyond any of that).

I want to know if they're wreaking havoc at other neighbor's homes or if it's the draw of the pool and gatherings LW hosts.  

CharmedPam

I already pictured LW already having a fence! I do.  But no lock so anyone can just come in.
That would be annoying to have to lock it for family members who want in and out though.  It’s also probably not police jurisdiction. i don’t know?

mrsconn23

CharmedPam said:

I already pictured LW already having a fence! I do.  But no lock so anyone can just come in.
That would be annoying to have to lock it for family members who want in and out though.  It’s also probably not police jurisdiction. i don’t know?

There are quite a few people around me with pools and no fences.  They have those mechanical covers that can support the weight of a car or whatever, so it's not required to have a fence. 

I don't LOVE the idea of calling cops on the kids (really, the mom, but you know).  It would be a last resort for me, but sometimes you do need to build a record and having the cops come and basically tell her to knock it off, or else, could be part of the process before you can take further action to alleviate the situation.  I would not take that step unless other avenues of relief didn't work.   I would definitely start with finding out the property owner and bothering them. 

levioosa

I am honestly always stunned by people who have pools and young children but no fence. If we ever have a house with a pool we'll probably have a fence AND one of those covers. This is so much liability for LW. I'd probably send a certified letter to the mom so there's a record just in case anything happens, and I would contact the landlord if they know who it is.

CharmedPam

I get that some pool go-ers don’t have fences… but I’m missing it in the letter where LW says they don’t?

levioosa

CharmedPam said:

I get that some pool go-ers don’t have fences… but I’m missing it in the letter where LW says they don’t?

I think it's more implied because the kids aren't just coming over and begging to swim, they're actually in the backyard taking food. I also feel like LW would have mentioned if they were also jumping the fence to do this. 

VarunaTT

She also said on our side of the property, so I assumed we were talking about what appears to be one continous piece of land, rather than fenced out.

short+sassy

mrsconn23 said:

LW definitely needs a fence.  Also, I'd call the landlord on her.  Can you file a complaint against the landlord if their tenant is a nuisance to the neighbors? 

But I'd also not be above calling authorities on the kids because you're worried about their safety.  I am not typically a fan of calling the cops, especially on kids, but they are endangered by being outside and trespassing into neighbor's yards with a pool, and that they are asking for food.  I mean, I'd look long and hard at the kids to see if they look under nourished. 

You've tried to figure it out with their parent and she's clearly uninterested (which side note, fucking insane bullshit entitled behavior on her part. I mean, I feel for the plight of single parents and all that, but this is beyond any of that).

I want to know if they're wreaking havoc at other neighbor's homes or if it's the draw of the pool and gatherings LW hosts.  

I'll be pretty blunt.  A neighbor can do that and it's not a bad idea because it doesn't hurt.

But most landlords won't really care, if the person is otherwise a good tenant.  Though it could be an extra push, if they feel borderline about the tenant.  It can also be a he said/she said type of situation.  Even if they do care, unless the tenant is on a month-to-month lease, they wouldn't have grounds to even give them a Notice to Vacate over this.  Much less being able to evict them.

About all they could do is contact the tenant and say, "Hey, I've gotten some complaints from your neighbor.  Please don't allow your children to go into their yard."  Maybe the tenant would listen to their landlord even if they don't listen to the neighbor.  But probably not. 

For an even further twist, there are a few states who pretty much don't ever allow landlords to non-renew a lease without paying the tenant a 5-figure relocation fee.  Then people wonder why there are fewer rentals available, which cause rents to go up even more.  And why nobody is building apartment complexes in their area, despite a housing shortage.