Friends wedding too close?

knottie30ab5c3bdec41c1c

Myself and my fiancé have been engaged for two years. We planned our wedding two years after our engagement as we are having a destination wedding and want to give people lots of time to prepare for travel. 

I have a best friend and a bridesmaid that has constantly copied everything that I do over the years. I buy a blue shirt, she buys five. I start doing something (a hobby), she does the same and makes it her entire personality. These have always been minor annoyances until recently she got engaged last week and decided that she wants to get married either a month or two before mine, which is approaching in a few months. Myself and my fiancé have been engaged for over two years and our wedding date is approaching in a few months, and she now wants to get married right before mine. 

It almost seems like she is rushing her wedding just to get married around the same time as me. 

In context, we are both in our early 20’s and not many people we know are getting married yet.

Although I respect her right to choose her wedding day, it is very hurtful to me because now it is very unlikely that I will be able to attend her wedding due to time off work for my own wedding, and I have a hard time believing that she would be able to travel to mine directly after hers. I expressed this to her and expressed my respect for her right to choose her date, but how I felt hurt that she was so ok with us not being a part of each others day. I also expressed how it really felt like she was rushing her wedding just to have it right before mine. 

Am I in the right or wrong here? I understand that she can choose any date, it’s just hurtful to me that she wants to put her wedding right before mine, and that she’s so ok with us not being a part of each others day. It also just really feels like she’s choosing to have her wedding just a few weeks before mine, just to take the shine away from me and on to her. Like I said we are in our early 20’s, and we are the only people that we know getting married. Just feels a little hurtful to me coming from a bridesmaid 

banana468

Let it go.  Getting married is not an accomplishment or a race.  By that I mean, being NOT married does not make you a "childless cat lady" and there's no rush in getting to exchange vows.  

If this is what she wants to do, it's her life.  If it looks like she's getting married before you then instead of looking at this as a competition, smile and be happy for her and then take notes on all the things that didn't go well so you know not to do them when your wedding comes up. 

knottie30ab5c3bdec41c1c

I know it’s not a competition, it’s more so the fact that I wouldn’t even be able to go to her wedding and she’s ok with it just to get married before me. I already have time booked off work for my own and I can’t take any more time. 

MesmrEwe

It may be a sign that the friendship is running its course, and that's okay!  Not everyone can go to everyone else's event and that's okay.  You now have information.  If you're invited, and can't go, send a card and small item from their registry and do not feel guilty about it.  Obviously, you're not a VIP to her in regard to choosing the date, WP, etc. as she chose it close to your event and didn't consult that you would/wouldn't be available so it's not likely she was planning you to be a part of the WP.  Things have an interesting way of working themselves out...