Wedding Woes

I feel for you and don't have a good answer

Dear Prudence, 

I’m a married single mom to two young boys. I am the breadwinner and primary parent while my husband works part-time. He’s a wonderful father (present, engaged, fun but firm) but a crappy husband (my needs are dead last every single time). We’ve been together a long time and as I look back on our relationship, I see all of the red flags I ignored, mainly due to low self-esteem issues and being afraid of being alone. I’m in therapy (solo, my husband refuses to go) trying to reconcile the anger I have at myself for not leaving the relationship early, at him for being such a hunk of junk to me, and the idea that I wouldn’t have my boys if I had left early on. I’m really struggling and my marriage is in rough shape. Due to financial reasons, we can barely afford my therapy, let alone a divorce. The idea of not being with my children every day is gutting. Finding time for myself is nearly impossible and I have zero privacy. I feel like a zombie most days and putting one foot in front of the other takes monumental effort. How do I survive this?

Re: I feel for you and don't have a good answer

  • This is hard.  Is there a way you can prioritize yourself while in the home?  Things like not doing the H's laundry, his chores, etc? 


  • Leave. It will be hard and expensive, but it's not worth living in a miserable marriage when he isn't willing to do anything about it. 
  • VarunaTTVarunaTT member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    OP needs to leave.  He's not going to change and it will continue to pull you down.  It will be hard; it won't be harder than this.
  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Leave LW.  It doesn't get much worse than being a married single mom.  You deserve better than this!
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