Dont renew

Casadena

ear Prudence,

I was really lucky to buy my two-bedroom condo when I did because afterward, the rental market went crazy. It is an older building, so it does have a decent-sized kitchen but no dishwasher. I updated the place so it has a deeper sink and a very small washer/dryer combo. I had been looking for a roommate for a while since I have higher standards like needing to be employed and not on the party scene. “Emma” fit the bill well and I even gave her a break on the pet deposit for her cat.

The problem is Emma started dating “Tracey.” Tracey lives with her parents outside of the city, so when she visits, she stays for several days at a time. Tracey pays nothing and can’t work because of her mental health. Tracey claims to have an alphabet soup worth of problems (but has never seen an actual professional—just self-diagnosed). Tracey constantly complains and points out that the apartment is not up to her standards. Often there are dishes soaking in the sink since Emma and I both work. I often cook and prepare meals for several days in advance, so I will finish cleaning the next day. Emma usually gets prepared meals and will leave her few dishes for me to do. This is unacceptable for Tracey. Even finding our used coffee mugs sets her off. She always refuses to rewear any clothes and has nearly broken my washer-dryer twice.

I finally banned Tracey from using the washer-dryer, and she spent the entire weekend sulking in Emma’s room and shouting at Emma (I could hear her through the door) about how my presence in my own place was suffocating her. I rolled my eyes but didn’t say anything until the next visit where Tracey “accidentally” broke several of my souvenir dishes from Japan. She was sorry but couldn’t stand the sight of them in the sink, and it was my fault for taunting her.

Emma wasn’t home yet but I went ahead and told Tracey to pack and get out. Tracey shrieked I didn’t have the right and I told her she could leave physically under her motion or mine. The reality seemed to sink in and Tracey tried to apologize and then left quietly. She apparently cried on the phone to Emma all the way to the train because Emma came home in a fury.

We fought and Emma kept echoing Tracey about her rights so I got out the lease and reminded her of the clause of no overnight guests without discussion or approval. I told Emma I was perfectly happy to let her break her lease and move out next month if she wanted. I know it was a low-blow because Emma has been in bad roommate situations before and can’t pay market rent. Tracey hasn’t been back and Emma hates visiting her at her parents because they barely approve of their daughter being gay. I genuinely like Emma, but this has gone on too long.
Her lease is up in a few months, and I don’t know if I should tell Emma this isn’t working out or try again. She keeps putting herself in a tizzy over what Tracey wants while Tracey doesn’t offer anything but demands. What should I do?

—Was Working Until It Wasn’t

VarunaTT

Yeah, don't renew.  This is bullshit and Tracy needs to get a grip on reality.

banana468

You don't renew a lease.  This is a business decision and it's not fair to you.  She needs to get out.

I'd also question the decision making and critical thinking of Emma.  Tracey isn't just someone who can't work but she's abusive and entitled.  And if Emma cannot see this then she's not making smart judgements and therefore  is not someone with whom you live or to whom you rent.

MyNameIsNot

Sometimes the consequences of choosing to stay with a shitty partner means you're also excluded. You're not responsible for Emma's bad choices. Don't renew the lease.

short+sassy

There is also a middle ground if Emma is still being a pleasant enough roommate, despite the issues with Tracey.  At the lease renewal, instead of renewing it for another year, do a month-to-month instead.

It wasn't a "low blow" at all.  It was actually a kindness because it gave Emma the opportunity to break the lease without penalty if she preferred to move somewhere else where Tracey could visit her again.

There is even a phrase for it with landlords.  Used for when a tenant becomes insufferable enough you want them to leave due to constant complaints about things that can't be helped or won't be changed because it's only their preference.  It's called the "Happy Clause".  It's like this:

"I'm so sorry John that this rental does not seem to be working out for your needs.  I will let you break the lease penalty-free with (insert terms that are usually an X-day notice)."

I've only done it once.  But stories I hear from other landlords is people rarely take them up on it, but the repetitive unfounded complaints significantly decrease or disappear.