Dear Prudence,
For the last year ,I’ve been attending a weightlifting class three times a week, with a rotating group of about 20 regulars. It’s mostly women but a few men attend too who really gel with everyone. It’s a really positive class and everyone chats before and after and cheers each other on during class. Everyone always says it’s the people who keep them coming back, including me!
The slight issue is that about every other month, we try to go out for a happy hour or something after our workout. While the concept of, “Hey anyone up for some beers on a patio right now?” after lifting sounds great, in reality, it just isn’t fun. There are a few people in the group who honestly just talk too much (including our otherwise beloved instructor) and are constantly doing this strange thing of trying to outdo each other with sardonic anecdotes about dating, their families, etc. I imagine this is a common workplace scenario but I’ve been self-employed for so long that I’m out of practice on how to avoid irritating people to connect with the ones I like.
This isn’t the most serious issue, but do you have any thoughts on how to shift the tide of a group conversation when one or two people keep taking over others? There’s not anyone specifically I’m interested in seeing one-on-one but I do really care about the group dynamic as I spend more time with these people than most of my close friends!
—Tired of the Monologuing
Re: Deal with it or don't go?