Dear Prudence,
My sister and I have five girls between us. She has four and I have one, “Susan.” We always had low-key family birthdays with a few additional children over. Neither of us wants to indulge in elaborate kid birthday parties.
The problem is that Susan is the oldest and has expressed distaste for these celebrations and wants to do more involved activities with her friends. And even the least expensive option is pretty pricey. We don’t make a lot so throwing down $500 for two hours at an indoor activity park or ice skating doesn’t make sense. We finally agreed that Susan could pick an activity with one or two friends—but now my sister is upset that her girls didn’t make the cut.
I pointed out that this was Susan’s choice and that she is growing up and wants to socialize with her actual peers rather than just her cousins. We see each other every week and can still have family parties. My sister claims her girls are heartbroken at being”rejected” like this. I feel this is disingenuous and she is milking the situation more than it is worth. She keeps bringing up the subject no matter what I tell her. I really don’t want to avoid family get-togethers. What now?
—Party Poor