Dear Prudence,
I have been dating “Cesar” for several months now. I’m not saying he is “the one” yet, although we get along great and our future together looks promising. But (there always seems to be a “but”), there is something about him that I don’t know if I can handle.
We have been intimate, but due to our work schedules, we had never spent the night together until the last couple of weekends. Cesar, when he sleeps, sleeps on top of the covers (wearing pajamas) and basically looks like he is in a coffin. Flat on his back, no pillow, arms crossed over his chest, never moving from the time we say, “Goodnight” until one of us wakes up for the day. He says he is a hot sleeper, so that is why he doesn’t need covers, and that he “hypnotizes/hibernates” himself before going to sleep by focusing on lowering his breathing rate and completely relaxing his body.
One time, I honestly thought he was dead because I could not hear him breathe, and his skin actually felt cooler to the touch. It kind of freaks me out if I happen to get up to use the bathroom and come back to what looks like a dead man lying on the bed. Plus, with him on top of the covers and me under the covers (I need a cover over me to sleep), there is no cuddling during the night, which I have enjoyed with previous relationships. Any suggestions on how to get over this? We are in our mid-20s, so the chance of him actually being dead is quite slim.
—His Sleeping Style Is Freaking Me Out