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Wedding Woes

H is a child

My husband “Grant” has forever complained about my mom’s body odor, as she doesn’t believe in wearing deodorant. Well, he decided to enlist our 3-year-old son “Dylan” to play a mean prank on my mother.

My mother came over last weekend, and when she went to give our son a hug, he said loudly, “Grammy, you smell like butt!” My mother was so upset she left, and Grant was laughing so hard I thought he would piss himself. Then Dylan asked my husband if he had “said it right.” Grant’s laughter stopped and he gave me a guilty look. When our son was out of the room, I asked him point blank if he had put Dylan up to saying such a rude thing to my mother. He admitted he did, but claimed it was to try and convince her to do something about her body odor. I fail to see why he couldn’t tolerate her for a few hours and had to resort to using our toddler to humiliate her. My mother is still upset about the entire episode. What can I do to make my husband apologize?

—My Husband Is a Bigger Child Than Our Actual Child

Re: H is a child

  • Why doesn't your mom want to wear deodorant?? I understand there are cultural issues that can be at play here so I'd want a far more thorough understanding if this is an ESH situation or just your H. 
  • banana468 said:
    Why doesn't your mom want to wear deodorant?? I understand there are cultural issues that can be at play here so I'd want a far more thorough understanding if this is an ESH situation or just your H. 
    This is pretty much where I am. I understand, even with cultural issues in play, why it would be difficult to be around someone who didn't use deodorant even for a few hours. But surely there are far better ways to deal with it than telling a child who doesn't necessarily know better to say something nasty to a relative.
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  • If her smell bothers him, he can sit further away. What the husband did is cruel and is teaching the child that bullying is how you get people to do what you want. No amount of being stinky makes this ok. 
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