Ceremony without readings?

sweetpea0911 · November 2010

Can someone give me examples or tell me about a wedding you've been to without readings? We have been going over our ceremony text, making edits here and there, and FI suggested just removing them all together. Having never been to a ceremony without at least one reading, this makes me feel a bit uncomfortable, though it's possibly because I can't wrap my brain around it. What say you? ((Also, ours is a church ceremony, if that changes your opinion/examples at all.))

Beachy730 · November 2010

A friend of mine who got married in August got married in a church just for her dad. But they wanted it to be as quick as possible. They had the readings, but the reverand read them. And honestly, a lot of people were talking about how much they didn't like the ceremony. It was just too rushed, and not personal at all. I like hearing the different readings, and seeing people near and dear to you reading them.

tenofcups4me · November 2010

I didn't have any readings at my first wedding. In general, I just don't care for them and think it's kind of silly for someone to stand up there and tell me about what marriage should be like. I get that some couples like them and that's their perogative at their own ceremonies, but for me, they felt like useless time-wasters (and are often contrary to my own personal thoughts on marriage). I think that most of the weddings I attend don't have readings.

It's funny, but unlike the previous poster, I haven't found readings to be personal at all -- using someone else's words to describe marriage doesn't add anything "personal" in my opinion.

Lisa50 · November 2010

I'm pretty sure we are headed in the same direction -- no readings, unless my cousin (the minister) wants to read something in particular. We've actually been more focused on music, in particular a violin duet my son and my cousin's wife will play.

schadbourne · November 2010

i personally will have one reading in the form of a poem, that is the only reading we will do but we are not getting married in a church and are pretty nontraditional. I don't like readings because I think they dragg out a ceremony and I feel as though most readings seem standard and make the ceremony unpersonal. I love that my ceremony will be about 15 min tops. I understand I am minority.

Maybe try and compromise with your FI and do one reading that really means something to both of you (unless religion makes you do something different)

i could pm you what my ceremony will look like if you want

good luck!

JenO24 · November 2010

for our wedding we didn't have any readings.
it was a beach ceremony and i didn't want anyone to feel like they had to shout just to be heard.
our officiant did read a few words that i had given to him describing don and my relationship, but that was the closest thing we had to a reading.
our ceremony still took about 30 mins since our officiant took his time and made the whole experience something amazing.
not having readings won't make your ceremony less unique and there's nothing wrong if there is a reading too. its up to the couple. your minister should be able to help you with your ceremony if your worried that it'll be over in a blink of an eye to any guests.

LauraT25 · November 2010

I don't think you need them if you don't want to have them. We had two, and our ceremony was still very short (15 minutes) - short enough that some people commented on it, though not in a bad way. I let both of our mothers pick the readings from a large list we had compiled, so they chose things that expressed best what they felt, and it seemed very personal to us and our guests.

I do, however, find many readings to be very impersonal, and it just makes it worse if it's forced upon someone and/or the bride and groom don't find the words meaningful. I think you should skip it if there's not something that you think works in your ceremony.

megk8oz · November 2010

We didn't have readings. We couldn't find anything that we liked, and we thought it was kind of stupid to have readings just for the sake of having them, so we just skipped them all together. Nobody seemed to mind.

sheenammeder · November 2010

For our wedding, my brother is the officiant- we are having no unity candel or sand cereomny, and no Bible readings (we are not religious).

In order to add something personal we are haivng a close friend read song lyrics from a song that mean a lot to us personally.

Dont feel like you HAVE to have something becuase everyone else does. I usually find readings to be too long. Ours will be 2 small verses.

belletop · November 2010

We are not having readings, and I attended 3 other weddings this year that did not have readings. It's nice, the officiant talks about things that are IMO more relevant and personal to the couple. It's not like they're just going to skip to the "Do you?" part - there will still be some talking.

artbyallie · November 2010

We're having two songs and no readings.

Summer2011Bride · November 2010

What about finding things you can read that mean something to you? Although we are having some Scripture readings, I teach English and am a huge Shakespeare fan, so we are also having his Sonnet 116 read aloud. Poems, exerpts from books or movies or music could all work as "readings" and still be important to you.

Lisa50 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_ceremony-readings-8?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:5c868428-b2c3-40d3-be89-da3b8cf53e66Post:807aeee4-778b-459c-bba3-8a7891a75030">Re: Ceremony without readings?</a>:
[QUOTE]They're filler. You can easily eliminate them.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

Agree. 100%!

Sarah5683 · November 2010

I'm having problems finding readings for my ceremony also. Thanks for posting this topic and thanks for all of the replies. It gives me more confidence in making a decision to not have them all together.