Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Oh, I'm so doing this ring warming during the ceremony

I was looking for something to replace the unity candle/sand/cocktail and I think this would be just right for us. I think I might ust ask them to touch tehm for good luck or something, but I'll work out the details later.

RING WARMING CEREMONY

The concept is simple: near the beginning of your ceremony, have your officiant let your guests know that your rings will be making their way through the assembled guests, with an invitation for each guest to hold the ring, say a silent prayer/blessing for your marriage, and then pass it to the next guest. Then the officiant can pass out the rings, and continue on with the ceremony until it's time for you and your partner to present the rings to each other.

Obviously, there are limitations to a ring warming: it wouldn't work well for super large weddings, and if you're having a big wedding you may want to have someone watching the progress of the rings and keeping them moving in a timely manner through your guests.

Some people worry about rings getting dropped during the ceremony — if you like, you can affix them to a pillow or book or some other symbolic item for the passing.

!

charlottesmom0626Knottie37373131

Re: Oh, I'm so doing this ring warming during the ceremony

  • Thats a neat idea!
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  • Sorry, but I think it's theatrical.  A wedding is not audience participation.  Also I think there are a lot of practical issues like REALLLLLLLLY slowing the ceremony down and the possibility of rings being dropped and lost.  Also I think many wedding guests will feel as I do that it is just a bit much.  Hate to admit it,but once you decide to have a wedding, you are putting youself out there to be critiqued, and I don't think the general critique of this idea would be high.
  • I'm not sure I would do this, but I see nothing wrong with "audience participation," I mean, relgious ceremonies sometimes have the congregation sing hymns or maybe recite the Lord's prayer.
  • Sorry-I'm with Alexmom on this one.  As a guest, I would find it cheesy, and would absolutely be snarking about it.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • I love this idea!  I hope it works out well!
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  • Nilla:  I love, love, love the new photo.  What a terrific shot!
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • I like the idea, but logistically, I think having people do it on the way in is SOOOO much better than trying to do it during the ceremony.  Much easier to have your guests come to the rings than having the rings come to them.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • I like the pre-ceremony option more so than during the ceremony. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_oh-im-doing-this-ring-warming-during-ceremony?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:69205022-25a9-45cc-b691-24bf3ec763b2Post:ab28a333-9223-4ea5-a9f8-66966b5bdf33">Re: Oh, I'm so doing this ring warming during the ceremony</a>:
    [QUOTE]Nilla:  I love, love, love the new photo.  What a terrific shot!
    Posted by trix1223[/QUOTE]

    <div>Thanks!  It's definitely one of my favs :)</div>
    Photobucket
  • I absolutely love the idea (especially before the ceremony) but I'm way too much of a control freak to actually do it. On the other hand, it could be a great way to get my future sister in law involved as the attendant before the ceremony. Thank you for the great idea!!
  • Yeah-rings are a vital part to a ceremony.  You can get married without flowers. 

    But the rings?  I just wouldn't want my rings left in a vestibule area somewhere, or for that matter,  passed around to someone who might think they were very clever to say  "oooops, I dropped it." and scare the daylights out of you.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • Fortunately I've been blessed with this amazing woman who is about to become my family. She has graciously offered to be our guest book attendant, but we are not having a typical guest book, therefore, no need for a guest book attendant. She and I have been thinking of different ways for her to be involved the day of and this seemed to be a great idea! Luckily, weddings are representative of the couple and being so close to our families, it makes sense to have her involved in our big day.
  • I love the idea of have them blessed before the ceremony. And, I love audience participation.  A wedding is not just about you, it's about uniting two families, friends, and lots of loved ones.  It's about having all of the support in the world behind you and your FI and about making new relatives.

    So, if you're worried about them being stolen or misplaced, have an area where an usher (someone who has a job anyway - for those that are worried about giving a guest work) could keep watch over them. Or have the ushers take turns as they alternating help guests find their seats.  I
     
    love this idea!! it just needs some tweaking. I personally hate the idea of a unity candle/sand pouring; I like the idea of your families and friends uniting, not just the two of you as a couple. But another great idea I got from another knottie is to have each guest send you a piece of fabric and the sew a quilt (if you're handy) from the pieces. Then, as a cermony of unity, you and your partner woud be wrapped in the quilt symbolizing warmth, comfort and love from your family and friends as they support your journey. 

    Best of luck with this - it will be beautiful!
  • I like the way mrs.jesse did this.  Although I agree that it doesn't replace a unity candle. 

    As a side note about weddings "not being about audience participation" - I have been to a LOT of weddings where the congregation as a whole is asked to promise to support the couple and show them how to love and be loved etc.  and the congregation is expected to say "we do" or "we will".  Do others not do this?  because that feels like audience participation to me....
  • i have to agree with everyone who's in favour of "audience participation" at a wedding.  firstly - you're a guest and a witness at an incredibly spiritual event, not an audience member at a show.  a wedding is about bringing to together a community of people to participate in the joining of two people in marriage.  simply being in the room makes you a "participant."  secondly - i'd rather be PART of the ceremony than just a member of an audience.  given the choice i'd want to feel like an active participant, not just a passive ticket holder.  at our wedding we included guests in reading blessings, singing songs, participating in the blessings and generally taking part in, and creating the joy of the moment, and we had 210 guests.    it makes people feel included, and i personally LOVE the idea of a ring warming.  logistically you'd have to think about the size of your guest list in terms of whether you make it part of the ceremony or a pre-ceremony event, but i think it's a great idea.

    go for it!
  • We did a ring warming, but it was only with the wedding party, and there were only two on each side, so it went super quickly.
  • I love this idea, although, for me, the anxiety of losing the rings might be too high personally.

    I think the before-the-ceremony idea (per mrs.jesse) is more pragmatic.

    You might also think about doing it at the RD if some of the concerns raised here are making you think twice.  Than it's a smaller group of people (depending on your RD).  Just an idea.
  • edited November 2010
    Two issues with this idea:

    1.  Ewwww...I don't want everyone handling my wedding ring before I put it on.  So many people, especially men, don't wash their hands after using the restroom.

    2.  I'm engaged, but am old enough and wise enough to know that most people don't really enjoy going to weddings.  They go because they're expected to.  They don't want to participate, they just want the ceremony to be over with so they can eat and drink.  This ring-warming idea just seems like an opportunity for major eye-rolling and smirking.

    3.  It's not an honor to be asked to do a job at someone's wedding (guest book guard, official ring wrangler, program hander-outer, whatever).  It's a chore, and no one wants to do it.  Except 12-year old girls.

    4.  Did I mention how gross it is for everyone to have their hands all over my brand-new beautiful ring even before I get MY hands on it?
  • Some of these responses are so cynical - I think this is lovely, and would hope that the guests invited to your wedding would be excited to be a part of something, rather than just sit there and listen to Corinthians readings. 
    charlottesmom0626
  • NYCMercedesNYCMercedes member
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    edited June 2014
    sarakans said:
    Some of these responses are so cynical - I think this is lovely, and would hope that the guests invited to your wedding would be excited to be a part of something, rather than just sit there and listen to Corinthians readings. 
    This thread is four years old. The wedding is long over. If you want to post about ring warmings, I suggest you start a new thread.
  • Love it. But I have extreme paranoia when it comes to losing my ring.

     
  • We're doing a ring warming, but only around 15 guests will be at our ceremony. My fiancee and I went to a local pottery place and made the ring bowl and painted it ourselves (which didn't turn out the prettiest, but it's unique) and his little sister, who's 7, is technically the "flower girl" but her job will be to pass the bowl around and then deliver it to the reverend at the end.
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