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Same Venue as sister

col+andcol+and
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in New Jersey - South
Ok so here's the run down, I have been dreaming of my perfect wedding since I was young and i had everything picked out and then a year ago my sister got engaged and she basically took everything that was my idea and used it.. including the venue. We just had her wedding last weekend and the venue was beautiful and food was great  but there is only one room.. I am planning on a fall/ winter wedding in 2011 and I am just so upset that she had her wedding there. Should i just get over it? or should i look else where...
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Re: Same Venue as sister

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    shannon1787shannon1787 member
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    edited December 2011
    If it's your dream to have it there then you should have it there.  You will make it your own wedding with the touches you add.
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    2010Bride2be2010Bride2be
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    edited December 2011

    If you like it, go with it. But you also said that she took all your ideas and used them. Perhaps you'd want to think about coming up with a whole new venue and concept if you're worried about people comparing or thinking that your wedding was similar to hers.

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    RangergirlRangergirl
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    edited December 2011
    I can actually relate to this very well... I had a similar situation with my sister (who is getting married this weekend) and I debated what to do. In the end I went in the total opposite direction of what my sister did (and what I had dreamed of.) I realized that if I went with what I originally wanted, two things would happen:

    1) No one outside of me and my sister and a few close friends would know that I originally wanted any of those things and it would look like I copied my sister instead of the other way around. Obviously no one wants that.

    2) EVERYTHING would end up being compared between the two weddings... what was better at one, what was worse at the other.

    The other thing is what would end up happening between you and your sister if you had it at the same venue and went with the same ideas. Is she the type of person who would be upset that you went the same route? If I had done ANYTHING the same as my sister, she would never have let me hear the end of it. I actually got in trouble with my family for getting ENGAGED (eight months after she did) before she got married (a year and a half before her wedding). So if that is the kind of sister you're working with I'd recommend against going the same way just to help your relationship in the long run.

    In the end, I found a venue I never even heard of until the day we booked it (literally - we saw it in a magazine, went a few hours later and booked it immediately) that I love more than I ever felt for the other things... our theme ended up being something we LOVE, the time of year ended up being way less expensive than what my sister has ended up paying and we each ended up with the wedding of our dreams.(Well.... planning the wedding of our dreams anyhow!)

    Good luck!
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    col+andcol+and
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    edited December 2011
    thanks ladies, it just gets me so upset. My sister is not the creative type at all so I guess I should be honored that she took all my fall theme ideas! I am leaning more toward winter so I know if i do have it at the same venue i know that decor would be completely different and the only people that would know is my parents friends and my family.. my friends, his friends and his family would not know that it was the same venue. 
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    CHarley2BCHarley2B
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    edited December 2011
    I booked my brothers venue. He got married 2 ago and I basically planned their wedding. We have quite a few guests in common and quite of few new guests. For me it was peace of mind. I know the venue and I know the food is great, they are professional and the guests loved it. To be honest where ever u go ppl are going to compare the two weddings and no matter how different u make it some ppl may think some things you copied. So in the end worry about you and your FI and make sure you're doing what you want and what makes u happy...not just what is different from your sister.
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    nancyrnancyr member
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    edited December 2011
    My sister got married at my venue (Tavistock CC) a year after I did, but it wasn't a big deal because our weddings were at different times of the year and were just different.  I suspect you'll find yours will be too.  Go with it if it's your dream venue, if not just be gracious about it, it won't do you any good to complain <G>.
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