*insert whine here*

KendallR10

Do we have to invite his chain of command?

FI is pretty upset with his CO and he doesn't really know the rest very well outside of work.

And I don't want to make the rest of the guys from his unit that we are inviting to feel uncomfortable just because they are there. I want everyone to enjoy themselves and not be all worried

calindi

I don't think it's mandatory, just suggested. And it's very likely his CO will decline - they know their subordinates just want to have a good time without Big Brother watching, and they get invited to tons of them. General etiquette is to invite his direct supervisor and CO.

SamiJoeB

Etiquette says yes, you should invite the CO, XO and his supervisor (I'm pretty sure). The CO and XO more than likely won't come, and his supervisor probably won't either, unless they're really close. It's differen't for Officers, but your Fi is not an O so that's irrelevant.  You don't HAVE to invite anyone, but thats what etiquette says you *should* do.

Why is your FI upset with his CO?

KendallR10

samijoe you have a pm

LOLways

1. Not inviting supervisor. He is a jerk and a misogynist.

2. Not even sure if I'm inviting CC and DO... Will be @ different duty station by the time invites go out.

Obviously my situation is different than yours, but don't waste an invite on someone your FI doesn't get along well with. If you wouldn't want them at your wedding, regardless of their position in the chain of command over your FI, then certainly don't waste an invite on them.

Edit.... My spelling is effed up. I think that vaccine I got today is getting to me... . Ugh.

SamiJoeB

back atcha

KendallR10

your turn sami

SamiJoeB

yours again.

KendallR10

yours

prettyirishgirl

hehe tag game going on

I would say the supervisor, CO and XO probably wont come, but it is proper to invite them. I'd also say this depends on if you just moved to that post, are moving away from it etc. In our case we will probably invite them. Because they most likely wont come, but we are prepared if they do. We also thought it would be a good gesture since we will be moving and requesting leave from a new chain of command that we will end up at for quite a while. We didnt want to accidentally and unnecessarily hurt feelings or fall short of expectations. Now if you're not moving soon and you already have an established relationship (whatever it may be) then I'd say etiquette could be relaxed if you have strong feelings another way. I'd just suggest remembering that since they most likely wont attend it may not be worth the two or three invitations and hypothetical four or so seats.

This i not all encompassing, but i'd at least consider the fact that although your FI may not get along with his commanders you as his new wife will have to get along with the other wives and girlfriends as well as possibly his coworkers regardless of how either of you may really feel about them. If your new to a post or aren't already involved in that group this may go a long way to help ease the way with very little effort on your part. That isn't to say that a group wont be accepting without that gesture, but it couldn't be bad.

jmpiccione11

We're not necessarily inviting his chain of command. However, I am friends with his CO's wife so in that situation I could see where I would invite her with the assumption she's bringing him to the wedding.

KendallR10

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_insert-whine-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:012c65d8-b4bd-42f9-92e5-664f4999f500Post:239b8394-d8c5-45d1-a371-378e8b813ecd">Re: *insert whine here*</a>:
[QUOTE]hehe tag game going on ;) I would say the supervisor, CO and XO probably wont come, but it is proper to invite them. I'd also say this depends on if you just moved to that post, are moving away from it etc. In our case we will probably invite them. Because they most likely wont come, but we are prepared if they do. We also thought it would be a good gesture since we will be moving and requesting leave from a new chain of command that we will end up at for quite a while. We didnt want to accidentally and unnecessarily hurt feelings or fall short of expectations. Now if you're not moving soon and you already have an established relationship (whatever it may be) then I'd say etiquette could be relaxed if you have strong feelings another way. I'd just suggest remembering that since they most likely wont attend it may not be worth the two or three invitations and hypothetical four or so seats. This i not all encompassing, but i'd at least consider the fact that although your FI may not get along with his commanders you as his new wife will have to get along with the other wives and girlfriends as well as possibly his coworkers regardless of how either of you may really feel about them. If your new to a post or aren't already involved in that group this may go a long way to help ease the way with very little effort on your part. That isn't to say that a group wont be accepting without that gesture, but it couldn't be bad.
Posted by prettyirishgirl[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>We don't live on post. FI is active national guard

</div>

prettyirishgirl

yeah then in your case i'd jsut be like ehh not so much