Newbie---just got news of possible deployment! :(

goodme02

Hey ladies, I am new to the boards here...but I just need somewhere to vent/get advice from people who understand... My fiance and I are finally getting married December 19th after being together for 6 years (he's been in the USAF for 4 of them). This is wonderful, and I'm so excited.......but I just got news yesterday that he might be getting deployed the first week of January for 4 months! It's not like we haven't been through deployments before, but this would be just when we were going to be getting our life started together...and I can't help but be saddened, upset by this. I was planning on moving to Alaska where he is stationed after the wedding, but now I don't know what to do...I really don't want to stay living at home after I am married...it will be like nothing has changed. Will I be safe/comfortable on base if I do move and I am there for the first 4 months all alone? I really don't know how to go about all of this..this is just throwing a huge wrench into our big plans that we had. Any advice is welcomed...

mehgank

I'm so sorry, that really stinks. But, also, there's not a whole lot you can do about the fact that he's getting deployed, you know? It's not really up to you. (sorry to sound so harsh, I don't mean it that way)I definitely know where you're coming from. I'm moving to Miami and a week and a half to be with my FI....only....he won't be there because he's currently deployed and will be till the end of November. And then, there's a chance he'll be getting deployed again in December till July (our wedding is next October). The strain of deployments is NOT easy, but you need to find out your resources at the base (ombudsmen/wives of his buddies on the air crew). I'm guessing he's stationed at Elmendorf AFB, right? I can tell you first-hand that that base rocks. The gym is amazing (each treadmill/bike/elliptical has their own television), their commissary is huge, and they have lots of places to shop at. There's also a pretty nice mall in Anchorage, too.  

Astephenson89

I am in a similar situation as you, my FI is leaving 2 weeks after our wedding. I will be staying with my parents while he is gone so that will give us a nice chance to save a lot of money that we would be paying in rent. Then right before he comes home i will get a new lease so we have somewhere to be together when he gets home. Good luck to you!!

blondiealwayfun

lol it sucks being with your parents, but it does save money, and also they keep you company when he is away..

corinnaandmatt

We were stationed in AK. Depending on the base, Elmendorf or Eielson, winter will be challenging time to move. Depending on your housing situation it may take a few weeks to get into a place and it will for sure take some time for your belongings to get shipped to AK. If he can secure housing before you arrive it will make it easier but if not, 4 months will not be that long considering you will need to be on orders to even move there and sometimes they drag their feet. Once you are married, the other wives on base will be great support and you can take that time to get to know them (especially since their DHs are going to be gone too!). On another note, AK is FANTASTIC and I highly recommend getting there as soon as possible! We loved it and I only wish we had more leisure time to explore the area.

ishatag

Before my FI deployed the first time, he made sure to get us moved into a house together. It was kindof fun unpacking his random stuff while he was gone. I felt kinda sneaky going through his things though! lol. Four months is not too long, (although here I am going crazy at 5 months) If you can find a positive attitude about 'building the nest' for him to come home to, you might be okay. Good luck!!

something_nice

I decided to move out of my parents house, even though Mike is deploying again (we're getting married when he gets back), because the family stress on top of the wedding planning stress, deployment stress, working and going to school just didn't seem like it was worth the savings on rent. But then my family is kinda kooky and I like my space when I'm coping with stuff. So if it was me in your situation I would go for it, 4 months alone to explore a new city sounds like an adventure to me.

sfeliu

i think it is pretty sucky but think of it as a positive thing. sure he'll be deployed for four months but you'll be in a new place so four months sounds about right for you to get settled in. get to know the area, maybe some studyin at a local university, finding a job if you'd like. anything that will keep you occupied and know that once he comes back he'll be coming home to you, his wife, rather then an empty home. you can also maybe jazz up the place, change furniture around and things like that so when he comes home its kind of like "man it feels good to have a wife at home." :]] and base ofcourse is super safe. my FI and I are still planning our wedding and he's joing the AF at the end of the year but my father served for 20 yrs in the USMC and living on base was great. there's always something to do. my mother wouldn't trade any of it for nothing in the world.

kaynix21

Aw, that suckst that he'll be depolyed right after you get married, takes out the fun of being newlyweds...If it were me, I wouldn't want to move to where his station will be when he gets back...I think it would be lonely. Since it's only four months, maybe staying home won't be too big of a deal. It'll go by quickly, you can work and save money, and rent...it's not all bad.Boo deployments!

Junebug060609

FWIW, my husband is deploying for a six months in January.  We got married in June...so we'll spend half of our first year married appart.  It happens.  I'll miss him, and I'll be dealing with selling the house and moving to our new location while he's gone.  But such is life.

As for your situation: You are lucky that its not a longer deployment and that it doesn't seem to be messing with your wedding date.  I've been to Alaska in winter, to an AFB actually (are you going to Eielson?) to visit a friend, and I wouldn't recommend moving up there in the winter if you'll be by yourself and not have a job.  Days are really short up there and it gets damn cold.  You'll need good winter gear, and if you're at Eielson you'll need to get your car equiped so it can be plugged in to keep your fluids from freezing.