Coast Guard wedding...

mrsjmwolfe

Hi all!
I'm new to the military situation, as is my FI. He leaves for boot camp in Cape May in April. Though we aren't sure what will come after that as far as picking a rate and such, we have booked a venue for November 2013. The venue said that they will work with us if he can't get leave and won't be home. A Master Chief he talks to said that it shouldn't be too difficult. Were any of you/are any of you in this situation? Any advice from other Coast Guard families? How hard will it be for him to get leave, or does it all depend on where he is/who is Master Chief is?

Sorry for all the questions! Thanks!!

kara811

I am not too familiar with the CG but I would wait on planning the wedding until after he is done with boot camp and when he finds out his rate and duty station. Also, keep in mind some jobs in the CG are deployable too, so you really should just wait it out. 

Also, I would scrap this screen name since it has your initials and future last name, there are always creepos lurking the internet. You should read the sticky at the top of the board about OPSEC and PERSEC. I'm sure there are other ladies on the board that are more familiar than me when it comes to the CG though. 

amh04

I second what Kara said, you should really wait on planning for him to finish Boot, find out his rate/schooling and reporting to his first duty station. I'm not sure how CG is but it could be hard for him to take leave especially if he just reported.

How long have you guys been together? How did you meet? While I suggested to hold off on planning you could still do things that don't require booking. Pick your colors, themes, locations. You could even meet with vendors and just have the ones you really liked marked down and then have a back up so when it does come time to sign contracts you already know who you are going to go with.

I'll also venture to ask how old are you and your FI? I know most of us recommend waiting to do a deployment before getting married, esp if he is planning on making this a career. Deployments are a great way to learn a lot about one another. GL with the planning and welcome to the MB board.

*Also agreed with reading PERSEC and OPSEC.

Danidawn20

I second all the PPs

Zimsgirl

I'm not great with much military stuff but ditto to Kara. Just wanted to say Welcome to the Board!

SamiJoeB

Ditto Ditto Ditto (especially the OPSEC/PERSEC remarks and getting a new sn!) ! Congrats and Welcome to the board!! Tell us more about yourself!!

Also, for what it's worth, my FIL is a retired BMCM (Master Chief) so I'm pretty familiar with CG stuff, and IrishCurls (I'm not sure if she's posted here yet or not) is a CG Wife!

Welcome again!

Irishcurls

Hi, and welcome! My H is CG as well!

No one can really answer how easy or hard it would be for him to get leave. It's all about the needs and coverage of the unit he's at. However, like PPs said, I can't stress enough the uncertainties of all of that until he actually gets there. Depending on the rate he chooses, some nonrates go to A school very quickly, others have 18 month wait lists...and that could affect his ability to get time off. 

Basically, I would say, enjoy planning and being engaged, make sure if you book or hold any other vendors, be upfront and get military clauses (in writing!) so you can change the date if need be. And have fun with the rest of it!! 

We got married in CT! Where are you looking, if you dont mind me asking?

edited clarity

Irishcurls

Hehe hey jinx Sami!!

crownsuperstar

I don't really know much about the Coast Guard.  H is AD Army.  I did want to say hi and welcome! 

Yes, please do tell us more about your wedding.  We would love to hear. 

ana66

First off, Congrats on your engagement and wedding!
And now to the good stuff, the wedding =]
I am AD Coast Guard, E-3/AN, and my husband is AD Coast Guard E-4/EM3, so we have some experience. =]

The serious part:I would honestly suggest at least doing a JOP wedding before he goes to boot camp and having your ceremony with your family and friends when you can. By just having that marriage certificate, he will get more money at boot camp and when he moves, the coast guard will pay to move you with him. They will NOT pay to move you after he is already stationed some where. Plus, you will get all the medical and dental care that is offered for military family members.

I would be very careful when booking a reception site without knowing where he will be stationed. If he goes to certain units it could take months for him to get qualified and majority of units will not allow leave to be taken until the service member is fully qualified. Also, if he gets stationed on a boat (which as a male non-rate coming out of bootcamp is extremely likely) he could be underway during the time you want your wedding. There is no way around this. It is just the nature of the Coast Guard.

The great part: The Coast Guard is wonderful! There are many places to be stationed and a great family to be involved in. It is the best branch by far and the opportunities are endless. I hope everything works out for you guys! If you have any questions at all about weddings, coast guard life, or the coast guard in general please let me know. I will be more than happy to answer them. =]]

melbelle24

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_coast-guard-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:36fde3c8-fca3-4cad-9487-c8a0a6246105Post:1d2ab012-c912-4ba6-8fa3-9114306a3f6a">Re: Coast Guard wedding...</a>:
[QUOTE]First off, Congrats on your engagement and wedding! And now to the good stuff, the wedding =] I am AD Coast Guard, E-3/AN, and my husband is AD Coast Guard E-4/EM3, so we have some experience. =] The serious part:I would honestly suggest at least doing a JOP wedding before he goes to boot camp and having your ceremony with your family and friends when you can. By just having that marriage certificate, he will get more money at boot camp and when he moves, the coast guard will pay to move you with him. They will NOT pay to move you after he is already stationed some where. Plus, you will get all the medical and dental care that is offered for military family members. I would be very careful when booking a reception site without knowing where he will be stationed. If he goes to certain units it could take months for him to get qualified and majority of units will not allow leave to be taken until the service member is fully qualified. Also, if he gets stationed on a boat (which as a male non-rate coming out of bootcamp is extremely likely) he could be underway during the time you want your wedding. There is no way around this. It is just the nature of the Coast Guard. The great part: The Coast Guard is wonderful! There are many places to be stationed and a great family to be involved in. It is the best branch by far and the opportunities are endless. I hope everything works out for you guys! If you have any questions at all about weddings, coast guard life, or the coast guard in general please let me know. I will be more than happy to answer them. =]]
Posted by ana66[/QUOTE]
Just as a FYI, we try to dissuade people from doing a JOP before training/deployment just to get more money. But if you do choose to do this, please at least be honest with your family and friends and TELL them that you're married.

calindi

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_coast-guard-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:36fde3c8-fca3-4cad-9487-c8a0a6246105Post:4a90b9b2-6a8f-42d9-90ff-1fa75e3fa296">Re: Coast Guard wedding...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Coast Guard wedding... : Just as a FYI, we try to dissuade people from doing a JOP before training/deployment just to get more money. But if you do choose to do this, please at least be honest with your family and friends and TELL them that you're married.
Posted by melbelle24[/QUOTE]

Very well said!  It all is a personal decision, obviously, but getting married by JOP is a wedding - you can, like PP said, have a reception later if you want, but if you're going to do that, why not just have the day you get married be your one and only wedding day?  There's no reason you couldn't plan it before he goes if it's important to you to be married before he goes AD.

Irishcurls

I just want to go on record saying getting married for 1) money and 2) moving help is gross in my opinion.