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My tough situation

camaroSSchiccamaroSSchic
First Comment
in Military Brides

Sorry everyone! problem solved.. I just wanted to say thanks for informing me of that military law, i truly am sorry for that.

As far as my spelling goes. Sorry I grew up in a small town where we dont have much of an education. my bad for being stupid!

thanks to everyone who made me feel stupid!! I appreciate it

by the way I do know how to spell, didnt think this was that kind of a website where grammar needed to be checked or "proof read" before people jumped you for it

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Re: My tough situation

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    kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Take his ETA out of this post immediately. OPSEC, OPSEC, OPSEC.

    Also, having a wedding immediately upon HC is not IMHO a great idea. It will be an adjustment for him, no matter how well he is taking this deployment, and reintegration will have rough spots for both of you.

    ETA: If you want to move to KY, do it. Get a job, get a place and live there. But give the guy some time to adjust.
    I hate Dave Ramsey
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    ladystoutladystout member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    First off, please take the dates of your post. You are putting your FI and his entire unit at risk with that information.

    Secondly, if you are that anxious, do a JOP with close family/friends and plan a big wedding later.

    Ditto what Stan said about giving him some time. He may not be the same person that he left as. Be ready to be patient and put alot of WORK into your relationship.
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    kb108kb108 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The OPSEC violation in this post makes me want to scream.  Please remove your FI's return dates immediately.  This is a serious security violation.  As a soon to be military wife, this should be of the utmost importance to you.
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    AlouetteBeansAlouetteBeans member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    maybe you could do a court house wedding and then a reception later when you know things will be more stable and predictable (if you do this, dont lie to people and tell them the second one is your "wedding")

    Also, it is HIRE not higher,  proof reading will help you get hired faster
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    iluvmytxrgriluvmytxrgr member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Ditto the ladies that called out your OPSEC violation.  You are putting your FI and his entire unit in danger.  Not only that, if someone reports this violation to your FI's unit or post, there is a good possibilty that his home comming can be delayed by weeks or months.  You would be to blame for ruining home commings for many other people besides your self. 
    BTW, you aren't just being told this by "overly paranoid" wives.  You have now been told by two service members who happen to be MP's. 
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    laddiebugladdiebug member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    OPSEC  OPSEC OPSEC... Remove that info NOW!
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    MandyBrownNoserMandyBrownNoser member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I really hope you are graduating high school.  And I really hope that you think long and hard about retaking some spelling and grammar classes.
    Fuuck TTC - I'm moving on.
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    kaynix21kaynix21 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Well, here's my opinion...

    When you apply for a job, especially part time, you DO NOT have to tell them you are moving in three, four, five months. Espeically when you don't know if and when it will happen. So there's that. Just don't mention it unless asked straight up, it's OK.

    Now it sounds like you want a summer wedding, ASAP and not a JOP right now. That you want to play for a bigger event with friends and family.

    For a summer wedding, you don't have to book for a cake now. That can be done at a later date.

    Say you pick a date, maybe late summer is better, to be safer, when you are talking with venues and find a place you want, explain that FI is in the military, and have them put in your contact that they will let you change your date, free of charge, if FI isn't home.

    My venue did that with us. If FI gets sent away, we can switch our date, but we cannot cancel for free, just postpone, as long as there is space, of course.

    There are things you can do now if you want a larger, non JOP wedding, to get your planning moving.

    But I agree, it might be better if you do wait. Sorry.
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    danamh83danamh83
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    You definitely need to remove those dates pronto, as that is a huge OPSEC violation.  In the future never post any HC dates bc you are putting the safety of YFI and others at risk.  Plus, it also delays HC for the rest of us gals waiting for our man.

    The fact is his date will change 123456789 thousand times before he gets here.  Re-adjusting is also difficult at first, and trust me you and YFI are going to want time to just be together again and get things back to "normal", without all the added stress.

    True, you might not get the wedding you always envisioned, but it doesn't matter about the wedding.  Either way, you'll still be with the man you love.  Focus on that.  It's not about pretty colors/flowers.  It's about you and him and your love for each other.

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    MellsBellsMellsBells member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    1. OPSEC

    2. Learn to spell.

    3. Military clauses in contracts with your vendors. Solved.
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    kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Your FI is going to need to time to adjust to life back in the states.  Please don't underestimate that.  I really, really, really encourage you to lose the getting married ASAP idea.  Give him time - returning from deployment is never problem free and each Soldier adjusts differently.  Wait til he's home and plan the wedding together after he has adjusted to life back home.
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    armybride6510armybride6510
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with Kaynix and ladies chill with the spell check it's a post not a thesis statement who really cares! 
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    kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_tough-situation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:558cabd5-54ff-46f1-93da-6437d912d885Post:679f424d-c18d-480c-bba6-9d90b08062ce">Re: My tough situation</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with Kaynix and ladies chill with the spell check it's a post not a thesis statement who really cares! 
    Posted by armybride6510[/QUOTE]

    It's a heck of a lot easier to give her advice if we can read the bloody thing.
    I hate Dave Ramsey
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    malanismalanis member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    First of all...edit your post and get his HC dates out of there. That's a major violation of OPSEC. You need to go and read the OPSEC rules. Secondly, a late summer early fall wedding would give him time to get home, go through reintegration, and destress a bit. Throwing him right into a wedding isn't the best idea. Take this time, enjoy your planning, and start looking for employment in KY.

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    StephR1215StephR1215 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    having a wedding anytime after his supposed date is probably not possible. First of all, the date is so tenitive that you two should not have even set one until maybe the winterish time. The dates you are given by anyone in his unit are not the dates he will be back home (most likely) and than he will need time to get his life back to normal. I know you are a new soon to be army wife but you need to look at his needs rather than your wants. The life your about to enter into is going to ask you to give up a lot as well as change plans you may have had for months. And for the love of all that is out there TAKE THE DATES OFF! If you want soldiers/spouses to help you there are plenty of other ways to tell us your information without risking lives.
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    camaroSSchiccamaroSSchic
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_tough-situation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:558cabd5-54ff-46f1-93da-6437d912d885Post:679f424d-c18d-480c-bba6-9d90b08062ce">Re: My tough situation</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with Kaynix and ladies chill with the spell check it's a post not a thesis statement who really cares! 
    Posted by armybride6510[/QUOTE]

    Thanks for trying to defend me
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    camaroSSchiccamaroSSchic
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    to those of you that couldnt read my posting (be it spelling or something else you were upset about) and inform me to remember his needs rather then my wants.. I did want to plan the wedding for later and he said he wanted it sooner.. so please stop making me sound selfish.

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    LbraceLbrace
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    wow...i was just lurking on this board since my FI is in the military...but after seeing how mean some of ya'll are I think I'll stick to my other boards. poor thing- she was just looking for some advice, not to be attacked. and about the spelling thing- if you can read her post well enough to correct her on misspelled words, you can obviously read it enough to "bloody" understand it. i'm outtttaaa here!
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