another day almost added to the time since i've seen him last. i can't complain, we've got a great situation considering. we have the ability to talk, in some form, pretty much everyday while he's out there... which is great. i know im luckier than most, so the idea of whining about him being gone seems petty to me in comparison to SO many military siginificant other's at home, patiently (or anxiously) awaiting their next contact.
he'll be home in, hopefully, less than three months. so again, something exciting to look forward to. i just, sigh... i just dont know.
i feel strange. i feel like the furthest thing from a "military wife". i dont know how im supposed to just assume that role. i mean, itd be nice to think that we'd maintain some sort of separation. but i heard this one quote that totally stuck with me... when you mary a marine, you marry the marine corps.
i just want to marry him. is it not just that simple? aside from his line of work, aside from silly deployments. am i really about to be so far into everything i dont stand for? im proud of his service, and i fully support anyone who willingly gives up their freedom for ours. but, i dont know. is the way i'm feeling selfish? wanting substansial separation of work and home? is that even a possibility? i love him, and honor his work, but i dont want to be coined just another military wife. i don't have the attitude, the tough skin, the typical political stance. i don't agree with the war, i hate weapons and brute force. i just want to be his wife... his yoga teaching, nature loving, peace striving, "hippie princess" (as he calls me) partner for life.
am i always going to feel this stifled? the last time i even attempted to join a group of military significant others, i was unfairly, and brutally banned. i dont think i can successfully walk on eggshells for a prolonged period of time

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man. i hope someone around here has some sort of experience with this.