Military Brides

These bridesmaid dresses?

I hope TK's hunger is sated for now, because I need another point of view on this before my mother drives me mad. 

So, We went back when I was trying on dresses in MS and my MOH tried on a few different bridesmaid dresses. We saw one we liked, but no one was in love or spoke up (Mother-more on that later). At that point we were looking at long dresses, our favorite was a chiffon.

Cut to, about 2 weeks ago. My MOH had ordered a dress from JCrew to wear to another wedding as a guest, but she had told me it might work as a BM dress. She went ahead and ordered it in navy. She got it in and it looks great, but she wasn't able to wear it to the other wedding because she needed to have the shoulders taken up. 

 (I don't know why the links are being weird) The color would be Dark Pacific. We would have red or gold shoes and bright red flowers. 

I sent the link to my mom basically saying that since my MOH already has this dress and there isn't another one I can think of that I love, why don't we just do this one (she is buying my sister's dress, hence why she has input). There just isn't another dress I have found that I would want to ask my MOH to spend another hundred dollars on. I mean, I know she would if there was something, but as long as it's close enough to navy and not hoochie, I'm fine with it. 

My mother is now freaking out because she things that dress will look completely wrong with my dress and that it won't look "formal" enough. Our wedding is not formal. I mean, I'm wearing a wedding dress, and it's in a beautiful church, but it's a 2pm and the reception is a buffet style cocktail hour with no dance floor. I think a knee length dress is fine. And, moreover, I don't really feel like searching for a bridesmaid dress while I'm 11 hours away. 

In the same lace as my dress. 

I guess, I'm looking for opinions. Is my mom right, should I talk to my MOH and see if she's up for getting a long dress? Should I (nicely) tell my mom to take a short walk off a long pier and buy my sister's dress myself? Anything in between or suggestions are appreciated. 


Re: These bridesmaid dresses?

  • dude, get the dress you want to get. This is something you can stand your ground on. Will your sister look good in it? Can your mom afford it?  If you like it, go for it. FTR, my wedding was evening, i wore a full dress, and my sister had a MOH from Ann Taylor that was cocktail length. 
  • Your mother is absolutely incorrect in thinking a cocktail dress can't look formal. If you like that one, your MOH likes it, then I'd move on. 
  • Thank you guys! I've been so zonked on Nyquil all day, and I'm glad you guys said what I was thinking. To answer the few questions, my mom was expecting to pay around $150 and this dress is on sale for far less and is simply constructed enough that my grandmother could do any alterations in an hour. And my sister will look good in anything on earth, she's a size 4 and 5'10", so probably just a little bigger that the JCrew model wearing it. 

    Gg- That's exactly what I told her. That most brides wear big/formal dresses and cocktail length is perfectly appropriate. I don't want them having to take care of a full length thing all day. 
  • My Mom is wearing a knee-length dress at my wedding, which is not exactly a black tie affair but surely isn't a casual event.

    I think your Mom probably just has some old school stereotypes and ideas stuck in her head, and sometimes those are hard to change (i.e. my Mom insisting on ivory invitations, until I challenged her to go to a stationary store and she realized ivory isn't a 'must' anymore).  Show her some pictures from StyleMePretty or TheKnot with bridesmaids with knee length dresses? 

    And as the other ladies said, if you can't sway her opinion, this is one place where it's 100% fine to say, "I respect your opinion, but this is what I want, and as it won't hurt anyone to do it the way I would prefer, this is exactly what we're going to do."



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