Good thing Fi doesn't post here...

SarahP787

I just wanted to share with everyone that yesterday I realized that, since I'm graduating in June 2012 and getting married in July, I'm going to have a brief window where I'm no longer covered by my parents insurance and not yet covered by Tricare. I mentioned this to Fi, and his suggestion was to secretly get married at the courthouse a few months beforehand and then have the wedding as planed! Oh man, I about died. How is it that otherwise reasonable people think that's a good idea...??

firsttimersluck

LOL
True story:
My FI wanted the same thing. He wanted to get married back in May for me to have dental again, and so that we could get all the crazy transition paperwork done
 --- />(no no, not the military side, school crap (because my college messes up everything and if I don't have the right name, I don't graduate. and it will be THEIR screw up) as well as the car crap because it's in my mom's name so we can't put it on his insurance until it's in MY name but we don't want to pay to put it in MY name before we change my name.. ack... stressful.... etc etc.. random crap like that stuff)
 
And I just laughed... I was like.. yeah sure.. you go ahead and get on that and we'llmake it happen. Two months later: Not so much. I knew he wouldn't go get the paperwork and all that jazz himself. Slacker. (not that I wanted him to. I specifically said that because I knew he wouldn't)

Then we thought we may get a JOP like.. two days before the wedding because our officient is out of state and it's a pain to get all that stuff figured out for her... but we've said screw it let's do it right. I don't want to have an "Anniversary" I want an Anniversary. :P

SarahP787

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_good-thing-fi-doesnt-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:b35b56c6-6234-4e1b-be47-021561c7663ePost:4f65f6ee-77a1-4d58-8ef8-5ee09cb0d9e6">Re: Good thing Fi doesn't post here...</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't want to have an "Anniversary" I want an Anniversary. :P
Posted by firsttimersluck[/QUOTE]

This exactly! I told Fi if I didn't want my family to be at my wedding, we'd be eloping on some random mountaintop like he wanted. So having a JOP on our own defeats the purpose of having the big ceremony, as far as I'm concerned.

firsttimersluck

True that! I tried to convince Fi to have us both get dressed up in white, go to Mt Baker and elope in the snow with our photog so we have awesome pics. He didn't go for it, so he can wait :P (he still tries to wear his wedding band though.. what a dork.)

greeneke2

ohhh lord.  I almost didn't read the last sentence and I about had a coronary! haha.

SamiJoeB

Haha.. Good for you Sarah!! some women at the gym today were talking about military marriages and how none of them last and that SM don't deserve "happy marriages" anyway and I very nicely said "Hi! I'm new, My name is Sami, My H is in the Marine Corps and I was in the Navy.".. It took all I had not to step on the back of the scale during their weigh ins.

firsttimersluck

B!!!!!!!tches Sami. Well done on kind killing! :P
I feell you.. I go to  hippy college that has HUGE protests every time an ROTC program tries to start up there... In fact, so many teachers frown upon military/former military that the teachers that are Supportive have this little "veteran" sticker on their doors so you know.

SarahP787

Woah! People are so rude...

FTL, that's crazy about your school! My undergrad college is a super hippy school, and there were definitely some unhappy rumblings when they started an ROTC program last year - but I don't think most people are actively anti-military! That's just sad... I feel like it's possible to be anti-war without thinking soldiers are bad people. My school is even rennovating part of the Career Center into a veteran's center! And for serious, my roommate took a class in which they were literally required to hug trees, so we're a legit hippie school...

calindi

Sarah, how old will you be when you graduate?  If you're under 26 years old, you can stay on your parents insurance regardless of work status, marital status, etc.  It's one of the big pluses (as well as no pre-existing conditions) that came out of the healthcare reform act.  Have your parent whose plan you're under ask their HR department - it shouldn't cost them any extra!

For what it's worth, FI has tried to convince me several times to get married early.

firsttimersluck

I swear the military has like.. wired all the guys to want this..

Yeah Idk what the deal is with my dumb hippie school.. bahaha I wanna take a class where I hug trees!! I think a lot of people don't think that through.. It's a big stereotype that all military WANT to go and shoot things up. I'm also in the math department so we have a LOT of teachers that aren't from this country (bolivia, russia, germany china, etc) so I think they have a bit of a jaded view. meh..

SarahP787

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_good-thing-fi-doesnt-post-here?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:13Discussion:b35b56c6-6234-4e1b-be47-021561c7663ePost:9d133d9b-774f-43dc-8d11-f826c36b9078">Re: Good thing Fi doesn't post here...</a>:
[QUOTE]Sarah, how old will you be when you graduate?  If you're under 26 years old, you can stay on your parents insurance regardless of work status, marital status, etc.  It's one of the big pluses (as well as no pre-existing conditions) that came out of the healthcare reform act.  Have your parent whose plan you're under ask their HR department - it shouldn't cost them any extra! For what it's worth, FI has tried to convince me several times to get married early.
Posted by calindi[/QUOTE]

Ah ha! That's awesome. Problem averted :) Not that I was super worried about having no insurance for like 2 months, but Fi was convinced I'd be tempting fate and be hit by a bus or something.

SJnTimmy

I think marrying before the actual ceremony is pretty common in the military world.

My FI and I have discussed it.  But it is so NOT what I want.  Don't get me wrong.  I know it would be easier in the end, but when I marry Tim, it will be the greatest day of my life. I couldn't imagine not sharing it with at least my family. 

We haven't done a lot of things the traditional way.  We did things the way it was best for us so I understand why so many military couples get married in secret, but I have too big of a mouth to keep it shut.  I know a couple who will be married for almost 3 years before her parents will know.  I mean, ya know, that's a little ridiculous.  But it isn't my life so whatever.

And I can't believe that about all ya'll schools.  Most of my professors are retired from the different branches.  I actually took a class on Vietnam War with a Vietnam Vet. It was great.  Just seems strange to not support the military.

ggirl2001

Haha my FI wanted to get married to do JOP as well. Not for benefits or anything like that, but wanted to be married before he left. Sometimes he can be sweet . We ended up not doing it obviously, and I am very happy with our decision. We are able to plan the wedding we want and have just one anniversary.