Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Is having a Bell Ringer lame?

I've got 3 nephews from the same sister, ranging from 3 to 8. The 8-year old is going to be the "Program Concierge," the 3-year old will be the RB and the 6-year old will be the Bell Ringer.  I've read that the BR is a lame role.  How else can I incorporate the 6-year old?  Their mom (my sister) suggested that having the younger ones both be bell ringers will cause "fights" between them so I'd like to stay away from that.  Suggestions for incorporating the 6-year old in a tactful, cute way?

I am not having a FG, so these 3 will be the only children (well 2 really, since the Program Concierge isn't officially part of the Ceremony) part of the wedding party.

Re: Is having a Bell Ringer lame?

  • yes.  It's also, IMO, very, very AW-ish.  Everyone will know that the bride is about to come down the aisle without a little kid ringing a bell like the town crier.

    I agree with sister2groom:  multiple ring bearers.  The RBs typically don't carry the real rings anyway, so they're really only there to be cute.  And they will be.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
  • I've never even heard of a bell ringer at a wedding. I agree with PPs, just have two RBs.
  • I've seen, at churches with bell towers, some church-affiliated person ringing the bell tower at the end of the service as the bride & groom walk down the aisle and exit the church.  It is a celebratory gesture, they also ring the bell at the end of some services throughout the year. 

    If this is the bell-ringing that you mean, then I think it would be fine to have the 2 kids do it as long as they are strong enough.

  • Will you have other music?  I like the idea. 
  • megk8ozmegk8oz member
    2500 Comments
    edited November 2010
    Do you mean like having them walk down the aisle ringing little bells? Because honestly, that sounds positively obnoxious ... and unless the bell is promptly being taken away after the processional, asking for a problem. I mean, what do you do if he starts fidgeting during the ceremony ... while still holding the bell? While 6 year-old may be more "controllable" than, say, a toddler, they most certainly do still fidget.

    Even if the bell is just for the processional and will be promptly whisked away afterwards, it still sounds like an obnoxious idea. Just have all the little boys be RBs. The only thing a RB really does is stand there looking cute, surely all 3 of them are capable of doing just that.

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  • I think we need some clarification on what this "bell ringer" role entails...

    - ringing (little bells) to indicate the start of the service, summoning the crowds into the church?
    - ringing (little bells) walking down the aisle to signify that you are on your way?
    - ringing (large church bell-tower bell) at the end of the service in celebration that you are now married?

    If you have a bell-tower I think it's nice to have it rung at the end of the service by someone capable.  But not a fan of walking down the aisle or the narthex with bells.

  • I was a bell ringer once... I built a bell tree from adult handbells and did the chiming of the hour right before the bride came in.  Mom was the organist, and when we got in the venue, the organ "bell" sound was just awful ... so we ran to the back, set up the bell tree, and I chimed the hour at the appropriate time.  I also chimed the hour after the ceremony was done at bride's request (for organ bells, again but we had to change).  

    Is that the kind of bell ringer you're talking about?  Seems a little odd otherwise... "the bride is coming, the bride is coming!"  okay Paul Revere go back to bed now... 
    July 16, Our Wedding Day, is also International Juggling Day!
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  • Yes, he would be the type of bell ringer that would come down the aile and "announce" the bride is coming.  I regret now not thiniking this trhough, and last month I had already asked him.  Ugh.  Lesson to learn: think through things at least a week before you decide. But honestly, I never thought it was lame until I came on here!  I'd rather have him be a RB now.
  • I personally say that if it makes you happy and it means something to you to have them in your wedding, then no it is not lame. If you are doing it just to make other people happy, and you aren't fond of it, then yes it is lame. Think about yourself and your happiness. People can sit through bells ringing if you like, I for one would never think OMG they had kids ringing bells, I would think that there is some personal meaning behind it.
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