Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
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Mothers, Mother-In-Laws... Role Situation

Okay, here is my situation...

My finance's brother just got married 6 months ago, parents escorted him down the aisle. Well they loved that so much that now they've just invited themselves to do it at our wedding, without my fiance so much as mentioning it, nevermind asking them. (At the brothers wedding it was a bit more un-traditional... The bride had her mom walk her in, her dad wasn't present)... We were going to go the more traditional route where the bride is the only one escorted in. 

However... now the situation is that I am having my Dad walk me down the aisle, and just my Dad, I'm really stuck on that traditional aspect there becuse I think that will be a very touching moment for me.  However, this leaves all the parents with active roles except my Mom.  She will be very hurt, I don't know what to do.  I am planning to have her light the candles so she is still an important and recognizable part, the only problem with that is my future MIL would have to light them with her, so we have someone from both sides of the family... but then my Mom will just have to sit down while my FMIL going back to the back to join my fiance and Dad.

I just don't want my Mom to feel left out, I know the way this situation is unfolding will hurt her feelings, I'm just not sure if there's a better way to set this up or something else she could do... Suggestions??

Thank you in advance.
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Re: Mothers, Mother-In-Laws... Role Situation

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    I guess I'm not seeing how it would be less touching if both your parents walked you down than if just your father did?  I think it would be tough on your mother if your FI had both his parents escorting him, but only your father escorted you.
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    I agree with 2dbride, but on the other hand, do you think your mom would feel like you were only having her walk you down because both of FI's parents are walking him down? I would feel like you were only doing it because you felt bad. 
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    How about asking your mother what SHE wants to do?

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    BeeBee22BeeBee22 member
    First Comment
    edited September 2010
    How about your FI telling his parents he wants to do it the traditional way?  He won't walk down the aisle at all, but enter at the side with his guys. Now is a good time to start standing up to one's parents as a couple if you haven't already.
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    Nix FI's parents... unless he wants it! If he doesn't, have him talk to his parents and give them other roles if they really want to have an active role in the ceremony.

    We're having both sets of parents light the unity candle toward the end of our ceremony so that everyone is involved (and yes, my dad is walking me in alone-- that way no one "poo-poo's" about it b/c daddy walking little girl down the aisle is traditional, so if you REALLY care that dad got to do two things when you only got one, then grow up. Your kid is getting married-- that should've happened by now).
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