Not Engaged Yet

In limbo but it is so amazing here!

Hi all, I don't post that often but I lurk all the time and you guys won't believe how helpful reading all your random posts has been over the past 6months-I would go so far as to say you kept me sane! This is probably one of the most unconventional engagements you'll here and I'm sure a few of you won't agree with it but hey for being different! We got engaged on new years eve, well day, it was 12.34am to be precise. My fiance (wow still doesn't feel real-for reasons that will become clearer later) was planning it for 9th Jan (day after my birthday and didn't tell me this until after he'd proposed) but spontaneously got carried away in the moment and asked me. By the seaside in a lovely big house we'd rented with 8 of our friends who were all downstairs! It took my breath away, I wish I can remember everything he said but he seemed to be down on one knee for a long time! He put his diamond ring on my finger as we have been given my great-grandmas ring which he wants us to reset and choose the setting together-I can't wait! He wants to ask my parents permission before we tell people and I know he's been planning the 'original' proposal for about 18months so I told him he should still do that once he's spoken to my parents
Wedding Countdown Ticker

Re: In limbo but it is so amazing here!

  • Sorry TK clunked out on me before I could finish and that should have read 'could' still do the original if he wants. So since nye we haven't told anyone but when we're alone have revelled in being engaged and although not traditional it's actually really lovely. We can enjoy discussing bits and pieces about what we want but not have anyone hassling us - it's actually quite nice to have this time for just us to enjoy. So FI says he'll still do something like what he planned but I don't know any details except it'll be around my birthday (Sunday). I can't wait so I got a spontaneous romantic proposal AND still a planned one to come-I feel like the luckiest girl alive and am so grateful to have found my fabulous man. I guess I just wanted to share with some people and also to tell people that it's not always conventional or planned or spontaneous (depending on what you want) but its always fabulous no matter what. Thank you all again.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Well congrats, I don't think any engagement is conventional or unconventional.  Must be an exciting time right now for you.  I remember that glowing period after Danish Man and I got engaged.  When is he going to ask your parents?  If he were proposing on Jan. 9th shouldn't he have already asked before proposing so not delay the announcement?

    What setting are you thinking of for your grandma's stone?  Hi by the way, did I already say Congratulations?
  • They were away until Christmas and we were away until yesterday. He's going to speak to them this week, not sure when, don't want to know. They've been annoying us for ages about when we're getting married and we've been living together for 2years so I know they'll be delighted but that's why he wanted to wait to announce it to respect them and I guess bring some normality to it! Thank you for your congrats :)
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • ...congrats?

    So, you're engaged, but you're not?  I'm confused.
    I french with my man
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • I agree with Tarra 100%. Deception is never good. Just be honest about how things happened and ask for their blessing if it's important to you. I'm sure your parents will understand and be happy for you.


  • We are engaged he just feels he should ask them before we tell everyone, I guess for their blessing rather than approval. It was his idea to also do it the way he planned and I have no qualms either way. The result is the same and everyone's happy!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I don't see the point either. You are going to lie for the rest of your life about how he proposed?


  • I think this is kinda cute :) Congratulations!
  • I agree with some of the other posters...this is an adorable story and I see nothing wrong with it. Are you technically already engaged? Yes. Do you need your parents permission? No. Is it sweet that he wants to ask for your parent's blessing and offer you the ring in the way he originally planned? Absolutely. 

    Sometimes I think people can get too worried about "traditional" views on engagement and marriage. I think if both of you are happy with this, then you should enjoy it and not worry about what others think.
  • A spur of the moment date...and then a kick asss romantic date...all sounds good to me!
    LilySlim Weight loss tickers
  • I think that's really sweet too. He just couldn't wait!!

    It makes sense to tell your parents first anyway. It's cute he wants to be tradiational but I imagine a funny scenario where the parents jokingly (and convincingly) say no... and FI is like "Uhhh....well... I already asked and she already said yes!" That should be in a movie.
    ******************************************************

  • I understand completely! It's not exactly a re-do, just following through with what he had originally planned. If I had spent a lot of time planning something for my FI I would for certain want to do it for him no matter what. I think it's very respectful that he wants to ask permission still (my FI didn't because our engagement was unplanned, but I still think it's sweet).
    My FI and I wanted to keep our engagement to ourselves for a while as well-it lasted three days!
    I don't view it as you deceiving anyone.
    Be happy, it's your life.
    In my wildest dreams, you always play the hero. In my darkest hour of night, you rescue me, you save my life wedding planning guide
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards