Choosing a ring

SKP82

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:3950616e-43e4-4fd3-a6b0-a75efc445471">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry, This is my first time on any bridal site. I'll check them out as well as a few other local jewelers. Note to self first hand experience then post... Otherwise they think you are an imposter. Nope just a gal who is getting engaged soon.. Oh and my moniker is my birthstone and birth year nothing sinister here either..
Posted by sapphire57[/QUOTE]

No need to go check out your local jewelers and let us know your reviews.  As MotoLyn pointed out, it wouldn't matter on this board as very few of us are near where you live. 

If you are not a spammer and plan to continue to post here, let us know something about yourself.  Introduce yourself to us and then go with the flow. 

motoLyn

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:3950616e-43e4-4fd3-a6b0-a75efc445471">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]Sorry, This is my first time on any bridal site. I'll check them out as well as a few other local jewelers. Note to self first hand experience then post... Otherwise they think you are an imposter. Nope just a gal who is getting engaged soon.. Oh and my moniker is my birthstone and birth year nothing sinister here either..
Posted by sapphire57[/QUOTE]


I'll  give you the benefit of the doubt and say welcome to NEY.  Just remember posts like your first one is like Jeana mentioned running into a room of strangers.  In  my opinion waving your arms around and yelling.  Hope you stick around, go visit the store and if you like to share your experience with us great.  But if you disappear we'll know better.  And to reiterate, my future in laws live in the area so I have been through there looking through jewelry shops already, a majority of them.  What I think might differ from what you think of the place.  But its all opinion right.

ericsbabygirl26

 I swear people on here are so hostile sometimes. I understand, she's new, but really guy???. I thought it was a little odd to talk about a store you've never been to, but she was simply giving suggestions. Geeze when did it become a crime to come on a message board and post what you think? Why do people post and then get what i feel like is harrassed and made fun of  just because it differs from some of our opinons. I thought the purpose of boards was to have fun, post ideas, issues, not be mean to new people.

sapphire57

I'm  Sylviana I live in Newport Beach\Costa Mesa .  I got divorced 10yrs ago and  was reluctant to even try this again, But, I finally met my prince.. We are in the early  stages of ring shopping. There is alot of everything here in my area it's absolutely overwheming.



Sapphire57

sapphire57

Thanks ericsbabygirl26

Elle1036

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:1db22139-70fd-438a-96a7-0f57fea6d5af">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]  I swear people on here are so hostile sometimes. I understand, she's new, but really guy???. I thought it was a little odd to talk about a store you've never been to, but she was simply giving suggestions. Geeze when did it become a crime to come on a message board and post what you think? Why do people post and then get what i feel like is harrassed and made fun of  just because it differs from some of our opinons. I thought the purpose of boards was to have fun, post ideas, issues, not be mean to new people.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

Telling the OP the way things tend to work on this board is not "hostile".  It's actually pretty considerate, in my opinion.  We could just let her continue to make posts that make her look dumb, but we didn't.  And I don't think anybody was particularly mean to her in the way they said things.

Trust me, if you had been around a year ago, you would see that things on this board are postively saccharine now compared to the way they used to be.

The purpose of these boards is to ask for and receive advice, like the OP mentioned, but it's strange to offer unsolicited advice, which is what she did.  It has nothing to do with her being new.  If I had made that post, people would make fun of me, too.  I daresay we'd even make fun of Jeana if she'd posted that, and she's a former mod.

jeanacorina

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:2c377701-cbb5-43e1-845a-e5fcfa90e5f8">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm  Sylviana I live in Newport Beach\Costa Mesa .  I got divorced 10yrs ago and  was reluctant to even try this again, But, I finally met my prince.. We are in the early  stages of ring shopping. There is alot of everything here in my area it's absolutely overwheming. Sapphire57
Posted by sapphire57[/QUOTE]


Nice to meet you!

Also, my first post here WAS met with some harsh words. I told everyone they were meaner than a video game forum, which got me made fun of even more. It was painful. That's why I try to give newbies the benefit of the doubt.

Elle1036

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:2c377701-cbb5-43e1-845a-e5fcfa90e5f8">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm  Sylviana I live in Newport Beach\Costa Mesa .  I got divorced 10yrs ago and  was reluctant to even try this again, But, I finally met my prince.. We are in the early  stages of ring shopping. There is alot of everything here in my area it's absolutely overwheming. Sapphire57
Posted by sapphire57[/QUOTE]

Congrats on finding someone who makes you happy.  You could always try asking on your local board if you want some jeweler recommendations.

ericsbabygirl26

i like the benefit of the doubt thing

SeaTea02

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:1db22139-70fd-438a-96a7-0f57fea6d5af">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]  I swear people on here are so hostile sometimes. I understand, she's new, but really guy???. I thought it was a little odd to talk about a store you've never been to, but she was simply giving suggestions. <strong>Geeze when did it become a crime to come on a message board and post what you think?</strong> Why do people post and then get what i feel like is harrassed and made fun of  just because it differs from some of our opinons. I thought the purpose of boards was to have fun, post ideas, issues, not be mean to new people.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

<div>I'm not sure, but how you are making the responses on this thread where people voice their opinions to sound like a crime.</div><div>
</div><div>And you mean harassed and opinions. Try the spell check button. </div><div>
</div><div>Edited for clarity. </div>

Beads921

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:1db22139-70fd-438a-96a7-0f57fea6d5af">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]  I swear people on here are so hostile sometimes. I understand, she's new, but really guy???. I thought it was a little odd to talk about a store you've never been to, but she was simply giving suggestions. Geeze when did it become a crime to come on a message board and post what you think? Why do people post and then get what i feel like is harrassed and made fun of  just because it differs from some of our opinons. I thought the purpose of boards was to have fun, post ideas, issues, not be mean to new people.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

<div>No one harassed or made fun of. Rather they offered their opinions, which is exactly what the OP was doing. </div><div>
</div><div>Moving on...</div>

desertsun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:1db22139-70fd-438a-96a7-0f57fea6d5af">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]  I swear people on here are so hostile sometimes. I understand, she's new, but really guy???. I thought it was a little odd to talk about a store you've never been to, but she was simply giving suggestions.<strong> Geeze when did it become a crime to come on a message board and post what you think?</strong> Why do people post and then get what i feel like is harrassed and made fun of  just because it differs from some of our opinons. I thought the purpose of boards was to have fun, post ideas, issues, not be mean to new people.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

Guess what? People DID post what they thought.

I must have missed the memo from the Knot Gods restricting my free speech to puppies and rainbows.

Or possibly I misread it as pooping on rainbows.

ericsbabygirl26

As I said before some on here are just not nice and apparently have nothing better to do than make new people feel like crap. Rather than giving kind advice, they give advice that comes off as "better than you" and and like a jerk. I didn't say that others weren't entitled to their own opinions but it was the way the advice was presented that made the advice seem rude and  the newbie thanked me for it. And i did spell check so it must have missed a word, my bad.

AudgiePodge

eircsbabygirl- Saver of the newbs! ..that didn't really need saving.

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:d24be0ce-5809-4142-8298-a6263f0a8488">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]eircsbabygirl- Saver of the newbs! ..that didn't really need saving.
Posted by AudgiePodge[/QUOTE]

<div>Someone (for someone else) used the phrase "Captain Save-A-Newb" over on the Wedding Party board.  Made me giggle.  As did this.</div>

ericsbabygirl26

nope just voicing my opinion, that i've felt since i joined and i"ve joined TK multiple times over the last few years

SKP82

Apparently the Knot Gods also believed this to be spam as the original post is now removed. 

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:f50d3ba1-4d57-47be-b45c-6291e6d78878">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]As I said before some on here are just not nice and apparently have nothing better to do than make new people feel like crap. <strong>Rather than giving kind advice, they give advice that comes off as "better than you" and and like a jerk. I didn't say that others weren't entitled to their own opinions but it was the way the advice was presented that made the advice seem rude </strong>and  the newbie thanked me for it. And i did spell check so it must have missed a word, my bad.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

I believe I possibly gave some of the more sarcastic responses.  I don't think anything I said implied that I am "better than" the OP. 

She may have "thanked" you, but she also responded "Fair enough" to our suggestions.  What here offended you so?  If it's something I said, I would like to know.

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:1db22139-70fd-438a-96a7-0f57fea6d5af">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]  I swear people on here are so hostile sometimes. I understand, she's new, but really guy???. <strong>I thought it was a little odd to talk about a store you've never been to,</strong>but she was simply giving suggestions. Geeze when did it become a crime to come on a message board and post what you think? Why do people post and then get what i feel like is harassed and made fun of  just because it differs from some of our opinions. I thought the purpose of boards was to have fun, post ideas, issues, <strong>not be mean to new people</strong>.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

I did, too, which is why I assumed it was spam.  That is not allowed here.  No one was mean to the OP. 

I don't get it.  Are you having a bad day?  (That was not a sarcastic question; I remember what you've been going through recently and am wondering if you could possibly be taking out other emotions here.)

ericsbabygirl26

HMMM only if i get a cape and some sweet looking tights:-)

ericsbabygirl26

@ skp82. Thanks for asking how I'm doing and remeberingIi am going through alot right now. I'm having a rough day, but no nothing out of the norm, I shall say nothing I'm not used to handling. Like previously stated i feel sometimes people's advice is given harshly, even when I first joined I think people are kind of rude that's all. I didn't personally take offense to anything.

SKP82

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:df78f7a9-7edf-4aa2-a38e-0682ba86ca9c">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]@ skp82. Thanks for asking how I'm doing and remeberingIi am going through alot right now. I'm having a rough day, but no nothing out of the norm, I shall say nothing I'm not used to handling. <strong>Like previously stated i feel sometimes people's advice is given harshly, even when I first joined I think people are kind of rude that's all.</strong> I didn't personally take offense to anything.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

I'm glad you are handling things well.  I understand what you mean when you say you think people's advice is given harshly.  That is why it is suggested that you lurk on the boards before posting and becoming involved.  The reason is to take the temperature of those who post on this particular board. 

I remember your first post and the types of responses you got, but I understood why people reacted the way they did. 

The women on this board are genuine, kind people who give amazing advice when asked.  Give the girls on here a chance; they will surprise you if you stick around, I think.

SeaTea02

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:f50d3ba1-4d57-47be-b45c-6291e6d78878">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]As I said before some on here are just not nice and apparently have nothing better to do than make new people feel like crap. Rather than giving kind advice, they give advice that comes off as "better than you" and and like a jerk. I didn't say that others weren't entitled to their own opinions but it was the way the advice was presented that made the advice seem rude and  the newbie thanked me for it. And i did spell check so it must have missed a word, my bad.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Check out the Wedding Bee. They are puppies and rainbows over there and they all think we are a bunch of meanie heads too. </div><div>
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</div><div>
</div><div>This is going to be my new sig. </div>

PandaBurr

I'm a genuinely mean person. >_>

desertsun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:f50d3ba1-4d57-47be-b45c-6291e6d78878">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]As I said before some on here are just not nice and apparently have nothing better to do than make new people feel like crap. Rather than giving kind advice, they give advice that comes off as "better than you" and and like a jerk. I didn't say that others weren't entitled to their own opinions but it was the way the advice was presented that made the advice seem rude and  the newbie thanked me for it. And i did spell check so it must have missed a word, my bad.
Posted by ericsbabygirl26[/QUOTE]

<div>I think there is a difference between sharing a painfully honest but respectful opinion and being condescending and mean. I think most of the posters here fall in the first category. </div><div>
</div><div>But I like the way you aren't afraid to state your opinion even though you know it isn't exactly popular, and I particularly like that you're able to do it in a way that is calm and not whiny or insulting. Good on ya, Erics. :)</div><div>
</div><div>ETA: I still think if you think the board is too mean, you should find either your big girl panties or a new board. Chastising people about it isn't going to change a damn thing. Just sayin'.</div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

Elle1036

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:6153108f-3010-4294-9394-3ce4a25fc584">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm a genuinely mean person. />_>
Posted by PandaBurr[/QUOTE]

True story.  She tried to sell me a defective moissanite.

Yep, Panda, I'm going to keep referencing this story and trying to make you look bad, just because I find it fun.

bourgehm

Sea, I want that siggy.

peekaboo2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:09350fca-afa8-4fa8-96d5-aa2a6b2fff53">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Choosing a ring : Check out the Wedding Bee. They are puppies and rainbows over there and they all think we are a bunch of meanie heads too.  This is going to be my new sig. 
Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]

<div>Puppies and rainbows all the time is obnoxious.  I find us to be more...realistic.</div>

PandaBurr

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:3e8b8746-3a2c-47d3-8f39-de65047a0335">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Choosing a ring : True story.  She tried to sell me a defective moissanite. Yep, Panda, I'm going to keep referencing this story and trying to make you look bad, just because I find it fun.
Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

See. Proof. I'm just a mean person who thrives on insulting people and bringing them down.

Also, I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids and <em>that dog!</em>

heyimbren

I also think it's more effective to specifically point out a comment you find to be mean when it is made rather than a general "some posts are so mean!!!" I see nothing wrong with replying to a post and saying "hey now [name] your comment here [comment] could've been phrased better."

I also think tone is often misread. It's really easy to miss the sarcasm or joke if you aren't familiar with a poster.

Elle1036

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:57375bc1-892b-4962-9d05-6dcf71b264c0">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Choosing a ring : See. Proof. I'm just a mean person who thrives on insulting people and bringing them down. Also, I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids and that dog!
Posted by PandaBurr[/QUOTE]

Ruh-roh!

desertsun

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_choosing-ring-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:32ca55be-02d2-428d-b207-6c9475da9e76Post:0a267312-9f6d-45ed-be9b-58f099dd57e8">Re: Choosing a ring</a>:
[QUOTE]I also think it's more effective to specifically point out a comment you find to be mean when it is made rather than a general "some posts are so mean!!!" I see nothing wrong with replying to a post and saying "hey now [name] your comment here [comment] could've been phrased better." I also think tone is often misread. It's really easy to miss the sarcasm or joke if you aren't familiar with a poster.
Posted by heyimbren[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>True story!</div><div>
</div><div>

</div>