Ceremony and Vow Ideas

Catholic Wedding- HELP!!

So, my fiance & I are both Catholic (I'm actually making my Confirmation & first Communion next weekend at Easter). We have decided to go the traditional route, rather than the non-traditional, & have our wedding in the Church.
However, this presents a problem for those guests who are not Catholic- ALL of my side. From what I've read- a Catholic wedding takes place as a Mass (or within a Mass) and Communion is given. My side, being all non-Catholics, will not be able to participate in this part of the Mass. I do not want to make them feel left out. Can we leave this part out of our ceremony? Or have a ceremony, just not as a Mass?
This has been a major stressor for me over the past few days..... :( My fiance is an OTR trucker, so as soon as he gets back in town & we can, we plan on sitting down with our priest & discussing these matters with him, I just wanted to get some feedback from some other brides out there.....

Re: Catholic Wedding- HELP!!

  • edited March 2013
    I might also post this on the Catholic weddings board over on the left hand side.

    I grew up Catholic, though I'm not practicing anymore. I do believe you can have a ceremony in the Catholic Church without it being a full Mass.

    However I've attended a full Mass Catholic ceremony and about half the congregation was not Catholic. They just stayed seated/kneeling during Communion and did not go up. It was totally fine.


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  • As PP have said, you can have a Catholic wedding without the consecration of the Eucharist, but usually this ceremony is for couples where only one party is Catholic. I've been to a lot of Catholic weddings, and I've never heard that non-Catholic guests felt left out of Communion. I really wouldn't worry about that honestly. 
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  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
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    The only other thing left to add is that you should speak with your priest for "option choices".

    At my daughter's mass, Father explained that for anyone not of the Catholic faith, they were welcome to process up to the altar with arms crossed against their chest.  This would signal to Father that although they were not able to receive Communion, they would be asking for a blessing. 

    Many of our non-Catholic guests chose to participate in that blessing.
  • This isn't something to stress over, I promise. As a Jew, I never feel left out at masses or anything like that. My religion is my choice, not something anyone forced onto me. Maybe if they forced me to be Jewish and then told me I wasn't allowed to participate in certain Catholic traditions, then I guess I'd feel left out.
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  • not an issue don't worry those who can't take communion just wont go up
  • It's nothing to stress about.  Those who aren't Catholic can still go up to get a blessing from the priest, if they so choose, or they can simply remain in their seats.  I'm an atheist, but most of the weddings I've attended in my lifetime have been Catholic, and I understand the meaning of communion to Catholics and I understand why it would be inappropriate for me to participate.  I just sit quietly for a few minutes and it's not a big deal.
  • Thanks to everyone for all your helpful posts!! The biggest issue here is that I come from a VERY judgemental, VERY anti-Catholic family of origin. I wasn't raised with the attitude that Catholics are devil worshippers or anything- just that they don't believe what we do. They don't believe that Jesus rose from the dead- they have Him still on the Cross, after all.
    My friends, however, have been very supportive & very excited that I am converting to Catholocism (both Catholic & non-Catholic), as they see what a difference it has made in my life.
    So, having the wedding in the Church, and then my anti-Catholic, judgemental family will feel that I am slapping them in the face by inviting them and them being unable to participate fully in the celebration.
    I do know & understand that the Eucharist is a big part of the Sacrament, however, I'm just not sure it'd be appropriate given the circumstances. If we were to decide to celebrate the Eucharist, could it be just between my groom & I?
    We're going to meet with Father when my fiance gets back into town, hopefully that will clear up alot of questions we have.
    Thanks again for everyone's help!! Helped to ease my anxiety!
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
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    Discuss everything with your priest.  Honestly tell him how your family is anti-Catholic.  See what he suggests.  It could be possible for just you and FI to receive Communion.  Good Luck.
  • In Response to Re: Catholic Wedding- HELP!!:
    Discuss everything with your priest.  Honestly tell him how your family is anti-Catholic.  See what he suggests.  It could be possible for just you and FI to receive Communion.  Good Luck.
    Posted by OliveOilsMom
    It is required that every mass have public communion, meaning open to all Catholics present (not non-catholics, obviously).  You can't have private communion (just B&G) at the mass.  That would kind of defeat the whole uniting purpose of the eucharist.

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