Oops I accidently registry stalked!

KD+BC

The invitations for my bridal shower went out yesterday and I realized I should probably double check the registries to make sure nothing was discontinued or missing. I got really confused because a couple things had disappeared from the guest view, the pillow shams and the hamper. I started searching the site and they were still available to buy. It occurred to me that maybe they had been purchased. I looked and they had! First gifts purchased! I vow to not look anymore because I don't want any surprises ruined. My mom will check to make sure we don't need any more small gifts or anything like that. Exciting!

To the marrieds/those who are getting married soon: did you registry stalk?

To everyone else: do you think you would be able to refrain from looking?

catemeg

I am terrible at surprises.  I'd hunt for, find, and shake my Christmas presents (if my Mom didn't wrap them super tight with like 80 bows, I probably would have unwrapped and rewrapped).  I keep checking to see if my great-grandmother's ring is where we put it - when it's missing, I'll know he's starting on my ring!

The only way to keep me from looking at stuff is to make it impossible.  My parents started locking my presents in a closet with a combination lock.  My boyfriend is going to take the ring now and put it in a safe deposit box so that I can't check on it.

And with a registry, I'll have to just have someone else have the password to check and let me know, "Oh, you need a few more inexpensive items" once in awhile so I don't stalk it!

[Deleted User]

My mom originally kept telling me that I wasn't "allowed" to look at my registry after I started it, but she's given in because she's so bad at using the computer that if we needed to add or delete something, she'd probably either end up wiping out the whole registry or end up putting 50 of one thing on it.

I don't plan to "stalk" my registry, but I do plan to "monitor" it just to make sure like you said nothing is missing or discontinued, etc (a friend of mine got married same time frame as me 2 years ago and she ended up having to add a whole bunch of stuff after Christmas because a lot of people shopped the holiday sales).

I don't think it'll ruin the surprise, really.  In my thinking, I put those items on the registry as suggestions for people to get us, knowing full well a lot of those items will be purchased for us...I just won't know until we open the gifts who got what - that'll be the fun surprise.

Hazel_B

The bride I'm MOH for apparently does not registry stalk at all. When I went to see about buying a gift for her I noticed a lot of stuff was discontinued. I told her about it and she did nothing. Then at the shower on the weekend, some people were semi apologizing about their gifts because so much of her registry was discontinued.

Now that was frustrating.

So, to answer your question I think I'd check to make sure things aren't discontinued but I wouldn't intentionally go see what people had bought.

Edit - I agree with Angie, who has bought it will be the big surprise.

KD+BC

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:b28e91a2-c80f-4985-838c-b2fbe2cd9cab">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]I just won't know until we open the gifts who got what - that'll be the fun surprise.
Posted by AngieD&JoeD[/QUOTE]

Yeah, that's the problem. JCPenney's tells you who purchased the item.

KD+BC

Hazel: That's just inconsiderate. I've been a guest at enough showers and weddings to know that there has to be enough on the registry for all price ranges. I'm terrible at picking out gifts for people and I don't want people to have to go through that with me. I showed my registry to my mom, sister, BMs, and grandma to make sure there was enough in all price ranges and not too many in the over $100 range.

To add the bad registry stories, a guy I went to college with is getting married and he posted the link to his wedding website. I looked on their registry and the only things less than $50 were plates and cups...at $40 EACH. I couldn't imagine being a guest had only being able to afford to buy them 1 plate. How annoying! They also had a $700 rug on it.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:3350738a-c518-4a83-b810-347689e5c589">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked! : Yeah, that's the problem. JCPenney's tells you who purchased the item.
Posted by KD+BC[/QUOTE]

OK, that would be different.  Is there a way to hide that feature?  That's a bit of a bummer, but I'd probably still double-check (maybe tape a strip of paper over the monitor of the side you know it says who it's from? <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />)

hetshup

Hazel, I have a bunch of stuff that is discontinued, but I've been really really busy and haven't had time to update.


KD- You should slap your own hand.

KD+BC

I promise not to look again!

[Deleted User]

A $700 rug?  That's just insane.  We're not done with our Target registry yet, but it was neat when I went on their yesterday to make sure everything from Monday made it on ok they had this neat feature that told me how many items I had in each price range and how many items they thought we should have in each price range (based on the # of guests). 

With how money conscious we both are, we're definitely trying to keep things in a good range of prices...right now we have things priced from 94 cents up to $179...I think we've got it all covered.

catemeg

Speaking of bad registries, my BF's 19-year-old cousin just got married.  We couldn't make it, so we were going to send a really nice gift instead.  Well, her registry STARTED at $50 - and those were for each wine glass!  And towels were $55.  Handtowels were $45!  Ridiculous!  She also had a $800 vase - she's an Army wife, so will be relocating frequently, so it seems silly to register for expensive fragile stuff!

And the uber-expensive wedding we went to didn't have a registry at all.  And that annoyed me since my BF is horrible at buying gifts and I don't know them or their tastes (since it's his friend).

breezerb

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:4f466e1d-1960-4da8-b86b-a013372e240a">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]I am terrible at surprises.  I'd hunt for, find, and shake my Christmas presents (if my Mom didn't wrap them super tight with like 80 bows, I probably would have unwrapped and rewrapped). 
Posted by catemeg[/QUOTE]

I was also this kid. I would open a couple presents and re-wrap them after.  But then I would get this overwhelming guilty feeling.  Didn't matter though, I did it every year until I was mid-teens.

 

Hazel_B

Hetshup - I hope that i didn't offend you on that one. You've also had a ton going on, I can't really say the same for my friend. I told my friend about the discontinued issue about a month before the shower and just doing a quick look now, it is much worse. She barely had anything on her registry in the first place and literally half of the items are discontinued.

hetshup

Oh no, I wasn't offended. I  actually had something more interesting to say, but got distracted and now I can't remember what it was. She could just be angling for money. Our new place doesn't have nearly the room of the house we moved from, so, discontinued stuff it is. I'm sad we don't have room b\c I really want a blender.

KD+BC

Hetshup: I don't know if this is an option for you but we are putting shelving up in our garage where we will keep less used things like a blender. We have an attached garage and right outside the door is a perfect area for shelves. We have very little cupboard space.

heyimbren

I'll be honest, I'm stalking my friend's registry. I'm not totalli sure why... I find it interesting?

I'm not sure if she's forgetting to delete things, or if she just wants a lot of stuff. She has two different priced toasters on there (big price difference... like $100) and 5 sets of 4 piece dish sets in one colour, and 5 in another = 10 sets total. She's in the middle of finishing it though, so I'm going to wait to say anything.

I would probably registry stalk, as much as I love surprises. It would just be too tempting and easy to do.

Hazel_B

Hetshup - I think you are definitely right that she is angling for money. When I visited her it was constant "we are planning on buy / replacing this" after the wedding.

breezerb

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:48600464-46cd-468a-b87d-8ee32037d9f7">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]I'll be honest, I'm stalking my friend's registry. I'm not totalli sure why... I find it interesting? I'm not sure if she's forgetting to delete things, or if she just wants a lot of stuff. She has two different priced toasters on there (big price difference... like $100) and 5 sets of 4 piece dish sets in one colour, and 5 in another = 10 sets total. She's in the middle of finishing it though, so I'm going to wait to say anything. I would probably registry stalk, as much as I love surprises. It would just be too tempting and easy to do.
Posted by heyimbren[/QUOTE]

Can you imagine if she actually GETS all those dishes? 

ekathleen684

I like to stalk other peoples registries so I'm pretty such I'll be HORRIBLE with registry stalking. It wouldn't be bad if I could get my mom to password them but you can look ANYONES up to see what they're getting.

and yes, I was the kid who would upwrap presents and rewrap them before my parents came home. I love surprises but I hate them if I know they're coming.

heyimbren

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:5f7c57aa-2e0c-4d32-bd79-8e6fce5c19ab">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked! : Can you imagine if she actually GETS all those dishes? 
Posted by breezerb[/QUOTE]

I actually am leaning towards believing that she wants all of them. In both colours.

I actually never realized how expensive household items can be until I looked over hers. $45 for a salt and pepper shaker? Geeeeez.

KD+BC

Bren, they don't have to be that expensive. I would never buy a $45 salt and pepper shaker set. We registered for a $10 pepper grinder.

jeanacorina

I did registry stalk a little bit, but only every few weeks. Most people gave us our gifts at the wedding, so it didn't really spoil any surprises. They bought things in the week before the wedding, when I was crazy-busy and didn't have time to stalk.

I also didn't stalk much before my bridal shower, however most of those gifts were purchased the night before the shower. All my peeps are procrastinators, apparently.

My fondest registry memory is still that certain someone who sent the very first gift we got--  they didn't have a return address and I didn't recognize the name. I was tossing and turning that night worrying about how to thank someone I didn't know!

I figured it out around 1am, as I recall.



Unexpected kindess is so awesome. It warms my heart every time.

KatyRoseM

I registry stalk some.  I like some surprises, I never look at my presents early.  Fi also really loves giving surprises, so I don't try to figure things out, even when I do I usually act like I havn't. 

leia1979

The discontinued registry items reminds me a bit of my friend. She didn't really want to register at all--she and her husband live in a 1-bedroom and don't have room for more stuff. She registered for very few items to satisfy the midwestern contingent of the family. Most everyone else gave cash. I know some people don't go for cash-as-gifts, but it doesn't bug me one bit. It's highly practical.

I can't imaging we'd register for much, so I'd probably be okay not looking.

mellimel19

I love surprises, but I don't know if I'd be able to stop myself from registry stalking. Hopefully when the time comes I'll have the willpower!

babybchbum

I ADMIT I REGISTRY STALKED FOR MY SHOWER 

[Deleted User]

hetshup - the small space (my townhouse is 1162 sq feet - which includes one-car garage space) is exactly why probably half or more of our registry is going to be storage stuff.  We're including some underbed storage, over the door (every door in the house is going to have something hanging from it, I do believe), even one of those cabinets that goes around the toilet (we saw 4 or 5 in Target and because we really don't care, it's going in the commode room, of course, we chose the cheapest one - $35 as opposed to the others that were $80 or more). 

I'm also trying to include a lot of collapsible items (like colanders, measuring cups, etc) - anything to save space.

KD+BC

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:50619a6c-b34c-497a-8d7f-9dc2e592f504">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]  I'm also trying to include a lot of collapsible items (like colanders, measuring cups, etc) - anything to save space.
Posted by AngieD&JoeD[/QUOTE]

That's actually a really great idea!

Jeana: <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

tafft1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_oops-accidently-registry-stalked?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:680af21f-ffa2-4f1d-bf0c-a5f697cc399fPost:66e7b0ec-7cd3-484b-96e2-2badd297ae2d">Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Oops I accidently registry stalked! : That's actually a really great idea! Jeana:
Posted by KD+BC[/QUOTE]

Agreed on the collpasable stuff ! We found out the hard way stuff takes up way too much space in a 1 bedroom 800 sq ft apartment , lol. We had to buy a bakers rack just so we had room to store things we use often , but it makes the kitchen look so awesome now so no complaints there ;) Somehow we found room for everything..and by the time we make the apartment "ours" it will be time to move haha

katanne9

I didn't stalk. It made my showers more fun bc I had sort of forgotten things by that point and made me more excited to open gifts.

After all my showers were over I looked them over regularly.

fontassidy

I learned my lesson about killing the surprise, w/my engagement ring...not that it lessened the overall awesomeness of the moment, but if I had it to do over again....

...I'm not planning on stalking my registry at all. If anything, FI or my sister can check and make sure things aren't d/c'd, etc.