Money Dance/Vent

CrzyCatLady

I just went to a wedding where there was an "Apron Dance" (aka money dance).  I've heard of the money dance before, but this was the first wedding I've been to where they actually did it.

It was the most awkward thing ever.  The DJ actually said, "Okay, everyone, get out your wallets!  You don't have to dance with the bride and groom to give them money.  They need lots of cash to help pay for their honeymoon!!"

My boyfriend couldn't make it to the wedding, so I brought one of my friends who is getting married soon.  I knew the bride at todays wedding was doing a money dance and my "date" is planning to do a money dance at her wedding.  I was secretly hoping see would she how awkward it is and decide not to do it, but she just seemed more excited to do it.  =/  I hate seeing her do something so . . . wrong and not being able to say anything.  AND she wants me to participate in the dance by collecting money.  Oy.  

Ember01

Honestly, I don't see a problem with the money dance. Sometimes at a huge wedding, it is the only time I get to say hi to the bride/groom and have 30 seconds of conversation.

AudgiePodge

Eh, I have nothing against them.  In some areas they're common, in others they're not. You don't have to participate if it's not your thing.

CrzyCatLady

It just was really awkward because I already gave her two shower gifts (one was a work shower) and a wedding gift, and they were very much pressuring us to give more money.  The DJ was very heavy on the guilt and they gave the maid of honor a mic and she actually called out people who hadn't given money/danced with the bride/groom and told them they needed to participate.  Each person only danced with the bride/groom for like 20 seconds and there didn't seem to be any conversation going.  

I can definitely understand wanting to get in some private conversation with the bride/groom, though.  I never really thought of it that way.  I still don't like them, but thanks for the new perspective!  

ravenray

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_money-dancevent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:745073b1-187b-4b24-8c50-92bd537c05eaPost:2732fef2-3241-420b-804e-55890593df59">Re: Money Dance/Vent</a>:
[QUOTE]It just was really awkward because I already gave her two shower gifts (one was a work shower) and a wedding gift, and they were very much pressuring us to give more money.  The DJ was very heavy on the guilt and they gave the maid of honor a mic and she actually called out people who hadn't given money/danced with the bride/groom and told them they needed to participate.    
Posted by CrzyCatLady[/QUOTE]

<p style="margin:0in 0in 10pt;" class="MsoNormal"><span style="line-height:115%;font-family:'Arial','sans-serif';color:#1f1f1f;font-size:8.5pt;">I have no problem with them in general.  They are very common in my area and I don't hold it against anyone (generally couples marry young).  However I do find it offensive when there is guilt trip going on.  If people want to participate then that is great but if they don't want to then they don't need too.  That part annoys me greatly.</span></p>

Ember01

OK, that is a little awkward, calling people out. LOL! I would be horrified if I were the bride. Everytime I've seen the dollar dance, it lasts a song or two, and the dj just makes one announcement at the beginning and another one towards the end.

I was trying to figure out if we could do some kind of a version of the dollar dance without asking people for money. Like I said, I like the idea of having 30 seconds with each guest... But, I can't think of any good ideas

ravenray

I like that idea Ember.  Maybe you can make an announcement.  Something like: "And for the next 4 dances we would like to dance with each guest for a short while. Feel free to line up, bride's side over here, groom's over there."  Something like that?  Or put in on the place cards....

CrzyCatLady

It actually went on for FOUR songs.  The DJ kept saying, "Remember, EVERYONE's Polish at a wedding!" as part of his push for participation.

Ember - Maybe you could just go around to each table to say hi to people that way?

I think I wouldn't have been so judgmental about the whole thing if it had only lasted one song.

polkadot111

Personally, I dont' mind the money dance. It's totally normal in some areas.

jaycee7389

Meh, I really wouldn't care if I went to a wedding and they had a money dance. I think the DJ saying "everyone get out your wallets" was a little crude though.

PaigeMcC

Getting called out would be awkward as balls.

I know money dances are common in some areas...they're not for me but eh, to each their own.

loves2shop4shoes

Wow.  I would probably die of embarrassment.

MLekathLEEN

They're pretty common around here but I don't plan on having one. I'm not a fan of the dollar dance. Like someone already said, guest have already bought a wedding gift and a shower gift, why go for whatever cash they've got in their wallet at the moment too? 

But, to each their own.

Peaseblossom55

Ive never been to a wedding in nJ where they are done.  It seems harmless but awkward.

CCO2012

I am going to have one when I get married. They are very traditional in the Latin American culture and in the area I am from. However, I will make sure my dj. band is not as tacky as the one you mentioned! You should never feel obligated to give money! That's just rude.