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Date?

darabrownsteindarabrownstein
First Comment
in Not Engaged Yet
Hi Ladies...

I'd love to get your opinions....
My boyfriend and I have begun researching venues to ease the process once we get engaged. We have potentially found something and are now looking into dates. Does anybody have an opinion on a 9/9/2011 date?

Does it give anybody an ill feeling seeing what date it is co-related with?

Thanks so much! Enjoy this exciting process....


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Re: Date?

  • katanne9katanne9 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Not unless you or your families were personally connected in a way to September 11th.

    My friend is getting married ON 9/11 this fall and I don't think it's weird at all.
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  • noelle24noelle24
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ditto katanne. 
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  • paintgirlpaintgirl member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Agree with above. It was a horrible, horrible national tragedy, but it happened on 9/11, not 9/9. 9/11 will always be a day of remembrance for our nation, but that doesn't mean it has to be a funeral every year. Unless you have a personal connection to the event, I think you're ok.
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  • dwest2201dwest2201
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    It's 9/9/11 not 9/11/?? anyways. 

    I would have thought nothing of it if I received an invite with that date on it or picking that date myself for my own hypothetical wedding.   I even know people who lost loved ones and some local firefighters who are friends of the family, my ex boss who went to ground zero with USAR (Urban Search and Rescue) to find bodies in the days and weeks following.
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  • PaigeMcCPaigeMcC member
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I agree with Kat.

    Also, shouldn't you get engaged before you start planning...?  Seems like that should be the first step to me.

    "Popular on the internetz..."
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    Canada is kind of like a whole other world with new things to discover that us americans only dream of. - Narwhal
    Paige I would like to profess my love for you and your brilliant mind. - breezerb
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  • **Mutley****Mutley**
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_date-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9efcf7f3-080a-4848-98cd-885b47a5053cPost:92007470-dbc5-4b5d-b50f-320e80edf40d">Date?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hi Ladies... I'd love to get your opinions.... My boyfriend and I have begun researching venues to <u>ease the process once we get engaged.</u> We have potentially found something and are now looking into dates. Does anybody have an opinion on a 9/9/2011 date? Does it give anybody an ill feeling seeing what date it is co-related with? Thanks so much! Enjoy this exciting process....
    Posted by darabrownstein[/QUOTE]


    I see nothing wrong with using the date.  However, what is this 'easing the process' crap?  I do have an opinion on that.  And it involves a giant side-eye. <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '834e8c80-2b4f-4ab5-8618-3e981d02ee72', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/3/6/834e8c80-2b4f-4ab5-8618-3e981d02ee72.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>
    <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '834e8c80-2b4f-4ab5-8618-3e981d02ee72', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> </a>
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  • hetshuphetshup member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It's fine, people get married on Dec 7th all the time, so 9/11 would be fine too. In many ways it's great too, you refuse to be sad on that day!


    But really, get engaged first.
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  • chipyponychipypony
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    So if you're planning the wedding, isn't that the same as being engaged? You really aren't making it any easier, you're just giving yourself a longer engagement, so why not just get engaged and plan the wedding...no need to put the cart before the horse
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  • jeanacorinajeanacorina
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Researching venues? Okay. Picking dates? Not okay.

    Get engaged before you go talking to vendors and thinking about specific dates.

    "I am looking at different places in the area and gauging the level of formality and the overall feel I might like for a possible late-summer/early-fall wedding. etc" --- No problem!

    "I found a venue we love and I wonder what people think about a wedding on (insert specific date here)?" --- Cart, meet horse. Please swap places.

    To answer the question.... with a question... what happened on September 9? DId I miss something?
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  • **Mutley****Mutley**
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_date-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9efcf7f3-080a-4848-98cd-885b47a5053cPost:f4062438-8413-4892-8a30-dcd4db2fd9e9">Re: Date?</a>:
    [QUOTE]To answer the question.... with a question... what happened on September 9? DId I miss something?
    Posted by jeanacorina[/QUOTE]

    Dara Brownstein is obviously getting married.  Doh! <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '03c86ddf-8e9e-4361-ac7a-30653176f3b4', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/3/12/03c86ddf-8e9e-4361-ac7a-30653176f3b4.medium.gif" alt="" /></a>
    <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '03c86ddf-8e9e-4361-ac7a-30653176f3b4', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> </a>
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  • NarwhalNarwhal
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    OP:

    How is Salvatore doing? Well, I hope.
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  • hetshuphetshup member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I guess it's b\c it's 9/9/11 like 9/11. It's a bit of a stretch really. You know I'm getting married 10/23/10, I'm sure that's something.



    For example-- in 757 Byzantine empress Irene recovers Iconclastic cult at Nicaea, and in 1925 the first horseshoe contest was held. Also women marched  for the right to vote, and in the 1940s the first transport to Birkneu happened.
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  • NarwhalNarwhal
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My parents got married on D-Day.

    You know, June 6.

    Not 1944.
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  • tafft1tafft1 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thinking about possible locales and venues I don't have an issue with - it's choosing a date and trying to get ahead of yourself. Nothing wrong with knowing that you want a spring or fall wedding , or say outdoor vs indoor , etc , and even having some places in mind to check out when the time comes , beyond that , it's unnecessary. Trying to plan things out early will not make it easier no matter how much you may convince yourself it will. In the meantime why not enjoy the relationship , still continue talks about marriage and your common feelings and goals for what you both want to achieve in your relationship now and in the future.

    The date you choose should be something personal and a mutual choice , not just some cool date , in my opinion at least but that's just me.
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  • alooha313alooha313
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    as far as the date, i wouldn't worry about it; while 9/11 is a sad moment in history, the world can't come to a halt every year around that time. 
    we are also looking into venues, setting a date, etc before the actual question has been popped...partly because of $, and partly b/c my OCD when it comes to planning.  we are using my great-grandmothers ring, which is currently being remounted.
    depending on how long of an engagement you are going to give yourselves, then sometimes you need to start planning before its 'official'.  we are looking to next april (i had originally wanted fall, but was vetoed by him), so i am currently playing the date game with the church and reception venue.
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  • jeanacorinajeanacorina
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Why do you need a question to be "popped" if you already know you're getting married and are already planning the wedding?

    Oh, the perpetual "I'm not REALLY engaged, but we have mutually agreed to plan a wedding" situation. Round and round we go.
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  • **Mutley****Mutley**
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_date-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9efcf7f3-080a-4848-98cd-885b47a5053cPost:b177927b-ae8b-4a47-ad5a-3c61d9a4e0c8">Re: Date?</a>:
    [QUOTE]as far as the date, i wouldn't worry about it; while 9/11 is a sad moment in history, the world can't come to a halt every year around that time.  we are also looking into venues, setting a date, etc before the actual question has been popped...partly because of $, and partly b/c my OCD when it comes to planning.  we are using my great-grandmothers ring, which is currently being remounted. <u>depending on how long of an engagement you are going to give yourselves, then sometimes you need to start planning before its 'official'.</u>  we are looking to next april (i had originally wanted fall, but was vetoed by him), so i am currently playing the date game with the church and reception venue.
    Posted by alooha313[/QUOTE]

    Who said that you must have a ring on your finger to be engaged?  Or that there even has to be a question that is asked? 

    Don't kid yourself.  The engagement starts when you start planning together and move towards securing a venue/setting a date.  To say otherwise is just deluding yourself for no reason.  If you want to have an engagement of a certain length, then you start planning when you get engaged and set the wedding for that certain length of time in the future.  You do not start planning, get engaged 6 months before your already planned wedding and then say that you had a 6 month engagement. 

    And holy signature batman!  It doesn't even fit in my window.  Please refrain from posting until you get that thing under control. 
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  • PaigeMcCPaigeMcC member
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    If you're mutually planning a wedding then you're engaged.  You don't need a ring to be engaged.

    Congratulations.


    "Popular on the internetz..."
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    Canada is kind of like a whole other world with new things to discover that us americans only dream of. - Narwhal
    Paige I would like to profess my love for you and your brilliant mind. - breezerb
    Murried Bio
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  • noelle24noelle24
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_date-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9efcf7f3-080a-4848-98cd-885b47a5053cPost:b177927b-ae8b-4a47-ad5a-3c61d9a4e0c8">Re: Date?</a>:
    [QUOTE] depending on how long of an engagement you are going to give yourselves, then sometimes you need to start planning before its 'official'.  we are looking to next april (i had originally wanted fall, but was vetoed by him), so i am currently playing the date game with the church and reception venue.
    Posted by alooha313[/QUOTE]

    Can someone pretty please (with a cherry on top) explain to me WTF is the point of this?  If you need the extra time to plan and save money, why not just "get engaged" sooner?  Honestly, I'd never take someone seriously who was looking at a wedding venue if they told me they weren't engaged yet.
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  • KD+BCKD+BC
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_date-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:9efcf7f3-080a-4848-98cd-885b47a5053cPost:c0851c09-3928-40f9-b2f5-16cf9c221055">Re: Date?</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's fine, people get married on Dec 7th all the time, so 9/11 would be fine too. In many ways it's great too, you refuse to be sad on that day! But really, get engaged first.
    Posted by hetshup[/QUOTE]


    Thanks for typing my thoughts for me!
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  • darabrownsteindarabrownstein
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hi Ladies!

    Thanks so much for everyone's input. My BF and I aren't moving forward officially until we obvi. get engaged. Just narrowing our search and having fun w/ our families while doing it. Unfort, there are a few personal reasons that have led us to go about things this way. But hey...to each their own.

    I wish you all much fun & love as you continue through this exciting process.

    Warmly!
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