The "honeymoon" period....

dwest2201

I believe that the honeymoon phase lasts about 2 years, I've been in 3 long relationships one to my so called first love (just over 2 years, when shiit got rough he bailed, but we were only 19 so whatevs), my exH (with for 5 total, but got tough at just under 2 years) and my BF now (2 years was when we were previously engaged, had just moved in together and were stressed about other stuff...shiit hit the fan left and right). 

As others have said beyond just a time frame for the honeymoon phase to over, it is also important to go through some hard times, illness of each other, serious illness or death of family or close friends, as well as the just flat out dumb shiit that we all do from time to time...I mean obvs more so them than us, but we've all done at least one dumb thing.  I can honestly say I knew that BF was the type of guy that I wanted to marry after I was hospitalized about 5 months into us dating (my dissolution wasn't even finalized yet) and he dropepd everything to be there for me for 3 days (he worked from my hospital room), helped with my son, took care of my cat and apartment and was just so supportive and loving even though I looked like death and was mostly just in and out of sleep...seriously I was in really really bad shape, my big tough dad thought I might not make it the first night, I was on morphine so I didn't realize at the time how bad I was.  That is the man that I want to marry, and even though he's been a royal pain in my ass from time to time I love him more than anything for the truly sweet and caring guy that he is!

As for puking...I've got a couple good ones, but I've never puked ON BF, that is pretty hilarious, Paint!  Once we were at a bar and I was drinking more shots than usual but feeling good...then not so good.  I went to the bathroom and didn't come back.  One of his girl cousins came in to check on me and I was puking and refused to come out or let her in.  I talked to her and said I'm not done, but I'm okay.  She kept saying he was worried about me to please let her in...but I hate having someone see me puke.  Well she goes and tells him...he comes into the womens restroom and jumped onto the counter and over the stall like spiderman (he's like 215 lbs.) and was holding my hair and rubbing my back and then got me some damp paper towels.  That was almost 2 years ago.

More recently I was pretty drunk and feeling frisky...we were hot and heavy into sexy time when a position change made me have to vomit. like. right. the. eff. now.  I pushed him and said "stop"...he was being all sweet like "oh did I hurt you, lets switch" but I just pushed him and ran for the bathroom.  I made it into the bathroom and puked on the floor right in front on of the toilet.  I was crying and saying how sorry I was in between pukes.  So much for sexy time!  I told him I would clean it up but he did it all, and held my hair and got me a big cup of water and then helped me to bed and put me into my pj's and tucked me in.  In the morning we had some good laughs over that...I did atleast wake up and make him breakfast the next day though. 

ETA: Holy shizzer that was long!

kellyt89

I'd agree with the 2 year thing, it was at that point where I started to really evaluate my 1st relationship in terms of "can I live with this person forever?" (and decided...no).

My SO and I were friends for 6 months, then dated on and off for 6 months and have now been official for a year (it will be a year exactly on Tuesday, aww ).

In the past year we've dealt with a lot - learning about and learning to deal with each others' mental illnesses, family and personal health issues, major life transitions, being LDR now, a and a dual stomach virus that ended up with both of us in the hospital, among other lesser things.

We've seen each other at our best and at our worst. We've definitely fought, we know each other's annoying qualities. But I would still say that in most ways we're still in the lovey-dovey honeymoon phase - I still light up when I see him or talk to him, we're both very naturally affectionate people, etc.

I know that we'll go through rough patches, that we're in it for the long haul (which means we'll deal with periods where maybe the sex drive drops off, or whatever. But we're a team, and that's my favorite thing. *insert gag noises here, but still*

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_honeymoon-period?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:c11e5967-b282-49fc-8b00-3c0b32454398Post:321e5d0b-6504-4d4a-8b31-b099cc37ac41">Re: The "honeymoon" period....</a>:
[QUOTE]I think the true test of happiness and what ultimately will make or break a relationship is going through hard times. I'm talking loss of employment, health problems or some other major turn for the worse. The sunshine and rainbows disappear and things get heavy, but <strong>if you can see through difficulties together, you are a stronger couple for it.</strong>Don't be afraid of this initial honeymoon phase ending. You will become comfortable and the rush of seeing eachother will fade to some degree. That is the natural evolution of a relationship. You still get that giddy feeling from time to time, but not constantly. It's wonderful that you are so happy, but dont cling to the idea that your honeymoon phase will never end. It will, and thats ok.
Posted by Lil B Mama[/QUOTE]

I really agree with what Lil B Mama said here. Every relationship has ups and downs. BF and I have been through lay-offs, going back to school, job changes, family deaths, marriages, illness & surgeries together. We've seen each other at our highs and lows...and we've continually decided to stay and support each other through it all.

At some point the honeymoon phase fades away and a deeper respect and love comes in. I love BF for everything we've faced together to date. He knows to get me chicken broth & Ritz crackers when I'm sick, he knows to just hold me when I cry and not ask questions, he knows to not ask how much longer i'll be when i've changed my outfit 3 times...these are the things that make my stomach flip when I think about him after years of dating each other. These are the things I appreciate in him the most now.