So I have a friend that is approaching her 2nd wedding anniversary next month. Her hubby really wants kids, but she's not ready. We've been friends since college and before meeting him, she always said she never wanted to be a mom. Once engaged she had a brief period of "baby fever", but after the wedding it subsided. They've bought a house that is a real fixer upper (ie: major construction) and she's working crazy hours. He was laid off and only working a PT job for about a year, but has recently found full-time work.
I saw her this weekend and she tells me that they talked and she said she didn't know if she would ever feel ready to start a family...so they decided that they weren't going to try, but they weren't going to prevent it either. I took that to mean she's going off birth control and they'll see what happens. When I said "so you could be pregnant in the next month or two", she said the idea made her want to throw up.
I'm trying to decide how to talk with her about this. I'm the ONLY person she's told - her husband doesn't even know she's mentioned it to me. I just feel that having kids is a huge decision, one that shouldn't be made with a "we'll see what happens" attitude. I almost feel that maybe she told me hoping I would be brutally honest with her, but I don't know.
What should I say? Should I say anything? I'm a firm believer that friends and family shouldn't judge a married couple's decisions since they themselves are not in the relationship - but this choice will effect more than just the two of them.
Help! I wold love to hear your thoughts and would appreciate any advice you all may have. (Sorry it turned out to be so long)