Anxious.

NurseyK

I'm anxious because although we aren't engaged and I know it's coming, the anticipation is getting to me. I moved in with him with the mutual understanding that engagement is imminent, so it's not like I should be cranky about it. But I am, a little bit. I'm getting so anxious waiting that my GERD is getting bad again... Oh how I love Prilosec, it keeps me from puking acid daily when I get stressed.  (Yes I have seen a GI doc about this.)

I'm a little bit sad because I was secretly hoping it would be this weekend, but instead he is working on cars, and I am watching season 1 of prison break. (Sidenote: highly recommend Prison Break!) Our one year anniversary is May 18th and I also secretly hope it will be that night or week. But I know if I hope and think too much that it won't happen... right, Murphy's law. 

I don't want to bring this anxiety up with him until way after our anniversary, just to give him the benefit of the doubt without being a nag. So help me get this off my mind or so help me God, I might go mad. 

Thanks for reading my rant.

ravenray

Breathe!  He is going to forget about your anniversary.   Just kidding.  Go read a good book.  Garden.  Play video games.  Paint your nails.  Go out on the town.  Anything to get your mind off of it.  Besides the more you think about it, I am firmly convinced that the less surprising it will be when it happens.  And you want it to be a surprise right?

luvdncn90

I'm sorry I can be of no help. I'm getting anxious too! M keeps saying it's going to happen soon and sooner then I think.

Today I went shopping with my mom, aunt, and sister-in-law and we went into Zales and I found this gorgeous ring that I'm in love with that was super inexpensive because of the sale they're having. I told him about it and how much and he was like oh I want that information....yeah, he's really not helping me keep my mind off of things. But when he says it will happen soon I believe him and so I'm not as anxious anymore.


Just know that guys have their own timeline with things. Maybe he just wants everything to be perfect or maybe he has a plan. I know it sucks but just trust him. 
Go shopping, read a book, pick up a new hobby, take an art class or something that interests you. There's lots of things you can do to keep your mind occupied.

[Deleted User]

I have GERD too!!! I totally understand how you feel.  Does your GERD act up when you get super happy too? I hate that it acts up with the good along with the bad.  Before I was diagnosed, I was told that my metabolism was really fast and I did everything the doctors told me to, but I was still getting vomiting ill EVERY WEEK! Try breathing calmly and really focus on your breath, also only sleep on your left side.

I feel as if a year is a little too soon to be getting sooooo anxious about a proposal, you need to be able to look back on the time as bf/gf without feeling stressed or anxious about it.  Think about how much of your life you will spend as his wife, now think of how much time you will spend as his gf.  It really isn't that long in the grand scheme of things, so you need to enjoy the dating stage THAT much more.  It's ok to get antsy here and there, but do not become obsessed with it, do not get super disappointed when it does not happen.

Concentrate on being in a calm mood, so that GERD doesn't get the best of you.  It's better in the long run to have the least amount of upset with GERD.

stemms8810

I am getting anxious too.  Our house closes the end of May and he knows I won't move in with him until we are engaged.  He already told me he bought my ring and there will be a proposal this summer because he wants me and my daughter to move in this summer.  Sooo, I am left wondering will it be before the house closes or after?  Fortunately I have plenty to keep me busy but if I was already living with him I would be even more antsy so I understand your feeling.  It will happen and when you least expect it so just relax, it will happen soon!  Like you said, it should be imminent!

lunarsongbird

You sound...well...anxious. Hit it right on the nose.

I'm so sorry your GERD is starting to act up again. A little anxiety about the engagement is fun, but not when it causes terrible heartburn to go along with the heart ache.

Have you heard of GABA? First my accupuncturist told me about it- then my endocrinologist told me about it. It's an amino acid. I take it only when I'm feeling particularly edgy, cranky, or anxious. "GABA is referred to as the "brain's natural calming agent". By inhibiting over-stimulation of the brain, GABA may help promote relaxation and ease nervous tension." (clicky)

It also helped my SO a lot when he was trying to process when his mom just got diagnosed with breast cancer. It also helps with sleep.

Are you feeling any better today?

NurseyK

Lunarsong - Yeah actually, I'm feeling a lot better today.  (this is long)

Greg and I went out for a late dinner/drinks last night. It was good to just be able to talk and laugh about nothing. Joking, on the subject of mother's day, he mentioned that his mother would be thrilled if we got prego before getting engaged because he is so old. I was like, yeah right that's not happening. Joke continues, he tells me he paid off my pharmacist to trade my BC with sugar pills. I'm replied.. hahaha, RIGHT you wish bucko. Conversation continues, he then brought up wanting to try as soon as we get married and maybe next mother's day will be different for us. I know he really wants to become a parent, and this is so exciting for us, but I have to remember that we may not be married by this time next year, and we may not conceive right away.  This is so much to think about!, I said. He said, you have nothing to worry about, it will happen soon enough. Just hearing his openness and that I have nothing to worry about helped a lot. 

Today was really nice. It was a brunch at his mom's house, which included his 10 closest family members.  I laughed to myself a little when his mom asked me if we had any big news to announce because I caught her glancing at my left hand. It's like they are all waiting for it, too. Everyone in his family is so kind and his sister and I are starting to bond more like sisters. Also in his family no one argues.... which is more of the type of family dynamic that I am used to. It's weird yet comforting to be in such a loving / positive situation. I feel good today. We still aren't engaged, but so far I have been able to just enjoy today and not stress.

NurseyK

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_anxious?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:c585345a-cdef-4dd8-9dd5-bedaa071b188Post:e6395f23-bb99-4b39-954f-588e58bad383">Re: Anxious.</a>:
[QUOTE]I have GERD too!!! I totally understand how you feel.  <strong>Does your GERD act up when you get super happy too</strong>? I hate that it acts up with the good along with the bad.  Before I was diagnosed, I was told that my metabolism was really fast and I did everything the doctors told me to, but I was still getting vomiting ill EVERY WEEK! Try breathing calmly and really focus on your breath, also only sleep on your left side. I feel as if a year is a little too soon to be getting sooooo anxious about a proposal, you need to be able to look back on the time as bf/gf without feeling stressed or anxious about it.  Think about how much of your life you will spend as his wife, now think of how much time you will spend as his gf.  It really isn't that long in the grand scheme of things, so you need to enjoy the dating stage THAT much more.  It's ok to get antsy here and there, but do not become obsessed with it, do not get super disappointed when it does not happen. Concentrate on being in a calm mood, so that GERD doesn't get the best of you.  It's better in the long run to have the least amount of upset with GERD.
Posted by amsybot[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Actually, no. It gets worse when I'm stressed, lacking sleep, and eating foods that I'm allergic too. Also, not so bueno when I have to eat dinner late because I work such long hours. The solution to that I have found is to just skip dinner.</div>

lunarsongbird

Yay! I'm so glad that you had a good weekend!! Andrew's family is also very supportive! His mom already says that she loves me...but I haven't said it back yet, becaue it's usually just in a text message.

Today we are at my parent's house and he is changing my car's oil. I've never had a guy work on my car before...so it's really quite cool! He even said I could take a nap!

NurseyK

Lunar -Greg does cars, too! Yesterday he changed my spark plugs, and today he is going to change my timing belt and the three v belts.  It's a little weird trusting someone other than the dealership to work on my car.  I have faith though because he built his current engine from the ground up and was restoring cars before he had a license. What does your BF do?

lunarsongbird

He works in the wine industry! LOL. He used to be a sommeilier for the Ritz Carlton in Half Moon Bay (the hotel in American Wedding) and now he is a wine distributor. He practically built a car with his dad when he was younger though.

I feel very strange doing nothing while he is working so hard though. I told him this morning, "I don't think there is anything I can do that you can't." And he said..."Hm...giving birth." So we've decided to exchance a lifetime worth of auto care for childbirth. LOL.

What does your BF do for a living? And then what does he want to be doing for a living?

NurseyK

Lunar - I LOVE WINE! K, got it? Don't forget it. I used to live near San Jose, and I have been to Half Moon Bay. Such a pretty area! If I could live anywhere, assuming I'm grossly wealthy because you have to be there, I would move back to the bay area, and live in the beach towns! So I take your SO brings home wine all the time? Grounds for termination if he doesn't, in my book. j/k.

Well BF is an engineer by nature. For work he is a solar engineer. It fits him because he a little bit of a tree hugger, but not to an extreme, and someday wants to convert our house to solar powered. He recently came up with a genius idea that will ideally help the company stay afloat. Since the idea was originally his, he is really busy with work these days. He loves his career and wouldn't change much.

For play he keeps his vehicles (both every day and an antique truck) running up to par. He is involved in countless home improvement projects, and it's a miracle when something gets finished. Also, he serves as my culinary guinea pig, which keeps both his tummy and his heart filled.

He has told me that if he could change his career to anything in the world, he would be a pilot for Cessna. Who knows, life has barely started, maybe it's still in his cards.

What do you do? From my name, you can hopefully guess what I do. I like to think of myself as a legal uniformed narcotic distributor, of sorts. My job requires me to be part ninja, part comedian, part tissue holder.... and hold a license to do such tasks.

lunarsongbird

Yes, Andrew and I quite the collection of wine. Before he met me- he went on a trip to Burgundy in France and bought all sorts of wine. However- we live in a 550 sq. ft apartment. So it takes up quite a bit of room. LOL.

I asked Andrew what his dream job would be- and he told me to teach people about wine. Hm. He's never told me that before. I wonder if he would like to work at a wine school. He always told me his dream job was to own a cute wine shop. ::shrugs:: The boy loves wine. But guess what? His degrees are in ancient histories and archeology. LOL!

Once he told me that some archeologists (?) discovered wine in the Titanic- and they opened it, drank it, and it was excellent!!

Do you specialize in anything particular?

I am a Human Resources Coordinator for Ross Stores, Inc. How did you end up in the Tuscon area?

My dream job- Gosh. I've thought about this one a lot. More then anything- I want to be a mom. However- I have a strong desire to help women- women that are struggling with everyday life. I have degrees in Business Management and Psychology. I've thought about being a massage therapist.

Hazel_B

Just breathe!

GERD definitely sucks. I find diluting apple cider vinegar (the whole stuff) with water helps to take the edge off.

lunarsongbird

Interesting....apple cider vinegar is also supposed to uplift mood, as well.

NurseyK

lunar - check PM 

lunarsongbird

My very first PM! Hooray!!